Know You Now
by Leasbian
Summary: Five years ago, Jane Rizzoli killed Patrick Doyle. Questioning what she learned from the Academy, she quit BPD. Now she's back into Maura's life, not only to protect her from the gang war she's been caught in the middle of, but also to win her back.
1. I'm A Little Rich Girl, Now

**I haven't given up on Some Unholy War. This story came to me from God. Just kidding, I thought of it right as I started to fall asleep. Then I had a dream about it and I really like the idea of it. I know where I'm going with it but I'm not sure if I like what I've done with it so far. Or if I'll continue with it. But, let me know how you feel about it and we'll see. **

**The characters are a little out of character because well they've spent five years apart. They're not the exact same women they were before. **

**Also, I unfortunately do not own these characters or the show. But once I marry Oprah, we'll see. **

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There was a cold sting to the air. Who the hell's idea had it been to have dinner at Alexander's Plaza on a winter night? _Oh right, it was mine because I had to follow up on some leads and I used to love this place. _The snow bedded the ground. Dark clouds occupied the sky. Her breath was optical. The wind transported airy flakes along with it, tossing the hem of her dark black coat. Her raven-hair hid her face from the world, momentarily. Long thin fingers revealed her bemused expression. She shoved her fists into her pockets, regretting deciding against her gloves.

"Time to nut up or shut up." Jane Rizzoli told herself. She ignored the stares she received from the other pedestrians on the street. The restaurant was close. It neighbored the Boston Police Department. She could see Barry Frost sitting there. Waiting for her. She'd almost missed him when she searched the occupied tables. He wore a hat that she noted to mock him for later when they'd become homely with one another again. His trench coat was dark blue or some sort of dark color. She couldn't be certain due to her lack of light. His hands were gloved. He didn't look like Barry Frost, but he looked precisely like Barry Frost. Her heavy-footed steps were detected and heard by the other detective. He looked up from his cell phone and a smile covered his face instantly.

"Jane Rizzoli," He stood to his feet. Scruff stratified the bottom half of his face. "Damn." He took in her alteration in appearance. She looked the same, but older. Jane was aware of it. She'd gained a little weight but most of it was muscle. Her hair was cut to her shoulders.

"Shut up." She rolled her eyes, but didn't bother hiding her smile. There was an awkward approach, he'd wanted a hug but she hadn't been sure. "C'mere." She finally gave up and wrapped her arms around the short man.

"Boy, is it nice to see you." He said over her shoulder. "What the hell have you been up to, Rizzoli?" He'd already known but he wanted to hear it from her.

She pulled away and studied the man in front of her. He looked tired. More tired than he ever did when she'd known him. She felt almost bad. It's probably been his only day off and he was losing sleep because of her. "Like you don't already know. I know you and Korsak have been checkin' up on me."

"Yeah, yeah." Barry laughed and sat back down. He motioned for her to join him. She obliged. "We have. But, we try not to."

"You try not to." She repeated, dubiously. "How is that old fat fuck, anyway?"

"Korsak?" Barry bit his lip. "Retired."

"Naw," Disbelief painted her voice.

"Yup," He nodded. "Been about..." He thought for a moment. His eyes connected to the clouded sky. "A month."

"Man," She mellowed in her seat. "Damn. What about Frankie? He give up?"

Barry smiled. "My new partner."

"Damn." She sucked air through her teeth. "Just...damn." She looked at the waitress about to approach them. The young woman resembled a young Maura Isles. Honey-blonde hair. Curly. It made Jane instantly recall the night undercover at Merch.

"Why you been gone so long, Jane?" The dark man finally questioned after a pregnant silence. Jane couldn't answer that. She could but it wouldn't make any damn sense to anyone but herself. She stayed away because she felt like she'd had no right to be around them. She quit the day she shot Patrick Doyle. A man who'd just been protecting his daughter. He wouldn't have hurt them. Not intentionally. That day made her reconsider all of the training she'd received from the Academy.

"Just needed time." She finally said. "Plus," She shrugged. "Maura kind of got everything in the divorce."

"Divorce?" He grinned.

"You know what I mean." She glared at him. "When she decided Patrick's life meant something to her, she also decided I didn't. Ma picked her side. I had about a hundred voicemails that proved it. You and Korsak would've chose my side but deep down I knew how you felt."

"Jane..." The dark man frowned. "You did what you were trained to do."

"That's why I quit." She licked her lips. The waitress finally interrupted.

"Hi, I'm your waitress for tonight." Jane spotted her name tag. Jenny. "Is there anything I can get you?" The young woman asked as she pulled out the pen from behind her ear.

"Just a salad." Barry leaned back in his chair.

"Since when all you eat is salad?" Jane shot at him.

He patted his flat belly. "Since the Doc told me I was gaining weight."

Jane shook her head. "Damn shame."

"Whatever." Barry made a face. "Will you just choose what the fuck you want already?"

"Alright, alright." She didn't even have to look at the menu. She knew what she'd wanted. It was the same thing she'd always got from the restaurant since her first day at the Boston Police Department. _I'm still the same ol' Rizzoli. _

"The Detective Special." The restaurant had a partnership with BPD since dinosaur times. Jane was sure cavemen ordered that very same special. Even Det. Caveman Rizzoli.

"Anything to drink?" Jenny wrote asked as she noted their orders down.

"Water." Both detectives said at the same time.

"Alright." Jenny smiled. "I'll be right back with your orders." They all knew it was a lie. Jane took a deep breath as she played with the tablecloth. It was wet from the venturous flakes.

"What have you really been up to, Jane?" Barry asked, quietly but boldly.

The brunette licked her lips then filled her mouth with air. She popped her cheeks with her hands and the quickly came out. It was childlike and she knew but it stalled her. "Private investigation." She finally admitted.

"Private investigation." Barry repeated. "Like...Sherlock Holmes?"

"That's something Ma would ask me." The brunette shook her head. "Yes, genius. Like Sherlock Holmes."

"I don't know, it's just weird." The dark man shrugged. "But I can see you pullin' that shit off."

"Big rich and famous idiots hire me to figure out something they could just go to the police about." She laughed.

"You make a lot?" He looked at her.

"Yeah." She nodded. "I ain't as rich as Maura but shit..." She trailed off.

"Shit, I know." Barry laughed. "I looked you up. I thought there was no possible way that JRI was you. Just a coincidence."

"It's me." She smiled. "Definitely me."

"Tell me about it." He encouraged.

"It's just like working for BPD." She admitted. "I mean, it's a little difficult because we don't have the same resources as you but we have something better. New Tech Analysis named Paul Griffin. Fresh out of college Swear this kid could beat you."

"I'll take you up on that bet!" Barry threatened with a grin. He brought a hand to his face to rub his eye. _He's definitely exhausted. You asshole, Jane. _Something reflective on his hand caught her attention.

"Is that a ring, Frost?" Her eyes were glaring, but only to get a better look. She could boldly see the ring but she just couldn't believe it. _How long have I been gone?_

Barry looked down at his hand and smiled. "Oh, yeah." He laughed. "Sorry, we got married three years ago."

"Damn," The brunette whistled. "Is it Anna?" Special Agent Anna Farrell had worked a case with Jane and the rest of her team. She'd arrested Tommy off of a fingerprint that was just circumstantial. But, Anna had really done a number on Jane's friendship with Maura. Making Maura keep it a secret. It took a while but Jane finally comprehended that Maura didn't do it despite her or because she was afraid. She authentically did not want to break the rules. If she could've told her while she'd been under oath, she would have.

"Nah," He made a face. "We tried to work things out. Didn't work. Job still came first."

"I'm sorry." She didn't know why she was apologizing. He was obviously happy with someone else. "Who is it then? Would I know her?"

"Kelly Johnson." He smiled at the thought of his wife.

"Detective Johnson? Of Robbery?" Jane almost high-fived her old partner. She was a beautiful woman. One that she herself had admired a few times when working with her. She was beautiful. Tall but not taller than Barry. Great body. Great detective. But, most importantly she was a great woman.

"She's on leave for twelve weeks." He admitted. He waited for the clock to finally tick in place in Jane's head.

"She's _pregnant?_" The brunette whispered the last word as if it'd been classified information.

"Sure is." He grinned.

"Damn." The brunette had realized she'd been on the edge of her seat. She leaned back. "What about Korsak?"

"Settled down again with Melody and Josh." Barry nodded as if it'd been the right thing to do. Jane had nothing against Melody and Josh but Vince had given her so much shit about settling down after his three failed marriages, it seemed like a stab in the back because she'd left. "They're much happier this time around. You can see it by just looking at them."

"What does Korsak do now?" She asked. "I can't imagine that tub of lard just sitting on his ass all day."

"He doesn't." Barry frowned. "He's the head of security over at the Hilton."

"Traitor." She glared. "Why can't people retire when they're ready? Instead of retiring when it seems convenient. He's going to miss working for BPD."

"Do you?" The question came back so quickly she was sure he'd punched her with it.

"Yes." She admitted. "I'm not going back. I can't go back. But, I do miss it." There was a silence. It was comfortable. Words weren't needed. They just stared at each other. Taking in the other's appearance. Jane's hair was wet from her walk from her car to the restaurant. The curls were more evident than ever. Barry's smile almost never wavered. Never waned. She liked that. He was truly happy to see her again. She could say the same for herself. She was happy to see him again.

"Do you still talk to your mom?" He asked as he walked her to her car. She would've told him it wasn't necessary, that she could take care of herself but honestly she wasn't ready to say goodbye just yet. Barry had been her other best friend. When she left BPD, she left him too. She left all of them.

"Yeah, barely." She shrugged. "We talk on Holidays and birthdays. I call her for hers or Frankie's or even Tommy's. She calls for mine. I call her for Holidays. I always send a present for them all on Christmas. I send her Mother's Day gifts. But, I think she gave up on trying to be in my life."

"Yeah," He nodded, understanding. "Ever check up on her?" Jane should've known better to assume but the very reason she knew better was the very person he'd been referring to. Maura.

"No." She shook her head. "I have no right." There was an awkward silence. Barry sensed her need to change the subject.

"Damn." He whistled, finally looking at the car they'd been approaching. It was black. It wasn't anything too outrageously ostentatious but it definitely turned the heads. It was a 2012 Infiniti M. "This your whip?"

"Yup." She nodded, proudly. "Got her with my first paycheck."

"Seems like something Maura could afford." He reached out to touch the car, carefully. Almost afraid it was fragile. With the way Jane drove, it couldn't be anything _neighboring_ delicate.

Jane scoffed. "Maura could probably buy six of these and not even put a dent into her savings."

"That's a scary thought..." The dark man looked at his old partner. "How much she cost you?"

"I had her built for me." She shrugged. "Cost all of my paycheck, though. Had a flashy car but no damn place to park it."

"Ha," He shrugged. Seemed like Jane. She _would_ go crazy with a car. "Guessing...thirty-thousand?"

"Nope." She shook her head, slowly. "Sixty."

"Damn." He sighed. "You lucky fucker."

"Hey," She put her hands up. "Nobody told your ass to stay at BPD."

"I might just come work for you." He nudged her.

"Nuh uh," She shook her head. "I can't have you puking in this baby when you see a dead body."

"I don't do that anymore!" He defended. Jane just gave him a look. "I don't!"

"Bullshit, Frost." She rolled her eyes.

"Whatever." He laughed. "Listen..." His smile wavered ever so slightly. They were approaching a serious subject. Or at least it was serious for him. "You probably don't want to...but there's a party for Korsak's birthday at the Robber tomorrow. It's a surprise but I'm sure he already knows about it. The real surprise would be you. I'd outrank all of the other gifts...unless someone brings him a Russian drag queen prostitute."

"I'd still be the best gift." Jane cocked her head to the side and smiled. "I'll see if my schedule's clear."

"Huh." He looked like he'd had sand in his eyes. They were glaring at her but he was smiling. "Rizzoli has to clear her schedule." He opened the car door for her. "Be there or I'll find you and fuck you up."

"Gotcha." She clucked her tongue and climbed it. "It was nice seeing you, Frost."

"Call me Barry..." He leaned his side against the door.

"Nah," She shook her head. "Makes me think of Barry White. And you my black friend are no Barry White. You are Barry Frost, the whitest black man I'll ever know. And the _weirdest_. Kelly must be more desperate than anything to marry your ass."

"Shut up." He slammed her door shut. "See you tomorrow at eight."

"Tomorrow at eight." She promised. She altered between focusing on the road and the man in her rear view mirror. When Jane returned home, she smiled. She was back to her reality. The garage door already opened for her.

"Eve's here." She said to herself as she carefully stopped the car. In this garage was three other cars. A used car she'd gotten for when she needed it for stake-outs. The other car was an even more pretentious vehicle than she had right now. That one was used for when she had meeting or appointments with potential clients. To show them that she wasn't fucking around about her money or time. The last car belonged to Yvette Valentine. She unbuckled her seat belt slowly then took a deep breath.

When she entered her home, she'd received a song of barks from two different dogs. Jo Friday and Sadie Monday. Jane knelt down to greet them.

"You're home late." Eve hadn't been facing her. In fact, she'd been sitting at the bar in the kitchen, appearing to read a book. Jane rubbed behind Sadie's ears and looked up to the woman waiting for her.

"Yeah." She pushed herself to her feet, again. "Remember my old partner I told you about?"

"Something snow." She still didn't turn to face Jane. "Bart Snow?"

"Barry Frost." The detective corrected.

"Ah," Eve dropped the book to her lap. "Barry Frost." She mentally noted.

"Went to see him at Alexander's."

"How is he?" She turned around in the barstool.

"He's married." Jane laughed. "His wife is fuckin' hot. Except she's all pregnant now."

"Hmm," Eve wanted to say something but decided against it. "Will you two be seeing more of each other?"

"Probably." The brunette pursed her lips. "I think this could work out, you know? I'm a different person but I'm still the same in a lot of ways. I think he's forgiven me on Maura's behalf."

"Maura." The other woman echoed. "Did you see her?" Eve wasn't blind or deaf. Every time Jane spoke of Maura to her, she picked up on the feelings Jane herself hadn't even known of.

"No." Jane frowned. "I didn't see her."

"I'm sorry." Her apology was sincere. "I should get home." She made a face. "Sadie didn't poop on your carpet."

"Thanks." Jane had almost forgotten why Eve had been there. She'd asked her to babysit her new puppy. This dog wasn't house broken yet. "Take tomorrow off."

Eve looked at her boss. "Really?" She smiled. "I mean, I can come in. I don't mind."

"It's your anniversary, Eve." Jane shook her head. "I don't want Tony coming to kill me because he thinks I'm _having an affair with you_." It'd been an inside joke. When Jane had first hired Eve as her assistant, she'd dropped her off late. Seeing the two spend an hour talking intimately close, Tony Kitsch – one of her investigators – assumed she'd been sleeping with the other woman. It made for a very uncomfortably loud confrontation the next day at work.

"He said he was sorry." Eve punched Jane's arm. Off the clock, she could treat the brunette however she wanted.

"Yeah, yeah." Jane laughed. "So, where is he taking you? I swear to God if it's some phony bologna played out gay dinner, he's fired."

"Since you've given us the weekend off..." The other woman packed her belongings. "We're thinking about going to New York."

"Good luck finding a ticket." The detective shook her head. "There's about a million idiots visiting New York daily."

"Anyone interested in New York is an idiot?" Eve looked at her boss.

"Yes." Jane nodded. "And Vegas and California."

"Tony had his Bachelor Party in Vegas." The shorter woman frowned.

"Tony's an idiot." Jane laughed. "I didn't think you needed _me_ to tell you that. He's the one that waited _ten years _to even propose to you."

Eve thought for a moment. "Yeah, he's an idiot." She looked down at the ring on her finger. Tony had been working Jane before she had. Only, he beat her by six months. He was her first employed detective and when business became a little harder for the both of them to handle, Tony pitched the idea to hire Eve. Jane was a little skeptical of her abilities at first until she noticed how easy her schedule was due to the woman. She didn't have to deal with clients as much anymore. She didn't have to deal with threats from other investigation companies.

"Get home to your husband, Eve." The brunette kissed her friend's forehead. No one replaced Maura in her heart but Eve meant more than a lot to her. Eve was like the little sister she never had. Tony being the brother she'd never wanted because he was just like Frankie. He looked up to her. It meant she had to be careful.

"By the way," Eve smiled up at her friend. "I got rid of your _friend _from last night." She bit her lip and smiled. Friend was a nice way to put what the woman actually was. Which was a random fuck Jane would most likely never see again.

Jane's face flushed. "My...uh...friend?" She received a nod from the other woman. She thought about coming up with some lame excuse about the woman being her maid or something but decided against it. "Thanks." She decided with the truth because there was no point in lying. Eve was more than used to kicking out the random females Jane hooked up with. It was something she'd appreciated about her friend.

"Goodnight, boss." Eve picked up her purse. "I'll see you Monday."

"Don't get pregnant this weekend." Jane called over her shoulder. "I can't afford to fire you and hire someone single." Eve rolled her eyes and flashed her a lone middle finger. With that, Jane was home alone now. Normally in this time she and her dogs watched a movie.

"Let's check what our low life friends have to say on Facebook, shall well?" She looked down at her dogs. They barked. She smiled, content with not knowing exactly what they'd just said to her. The two small dogs followed her from the kitchen to the living room. Her house was only moderately large. It was spacious because she'd been the only resident but it was simple. It was bigger than Maura's home but not too big. It was evident how much money she made but how much of it she didn't spend. She knew better than to go crazy with her money. Angela Rizzoli taught her better than that. But she simply had _too much_ money. She had to buy this place out just to get rid some of it. That much money could make a person go crazy. Jane's company wasn't just for people in Boston or Massachusetts alone. She traveled the United States to investigate for rich people. She was good at her job. Too good. She knew her talent couldn't be wasted.

The living room's hardwood floor creaked under her feet. She loved that feeling in the morning. It reminded her of her childhood home that was now occupied by another family. When she used to sneak out in the middle of the night to go practice softball down at the park. She knew it wasn't safe and once or twice she was bothered by men thrice her age but she did it anyway because she wanted to be the best on her team.

"Let's see." She opened her laptop. She took the seat at the desk and Sadie jumped on her lip. Jo stayed in her spot but only barked up at her. "Sorry, Jo. No more room up here for you." She received another bark. "Then why don't you jump up here and see! You'll just fall off. My lap is small, okay!" She shook her head. She needed a girlfriend. She was seriously having an argument about the size of her lap with her dog. "I'm sorry, Jo." She looked down at the dog. She frowned and picked her up and put her on the desk with her laptop. "Do not try to eat this." She pointed to the MacBook. She received something that corresponded a nod from the dog.

She typed the first few letters to Facebook then waited for the page to load. It didn't take long. She'd already been signed in. So, she read some of the posts from her friends and associates. She rubbed away at Sadie's ears as she read the unbelievably whiny posts.

_ Barry Frost: I had a great dinner with my old best friend, Jane Rizzoli. I missed you, partner. _The post had been tagged with her name and account attached to it. She shook her head and snaked her arms around Sadie Monday to type. She tried to think of a reply.

_Me too, buddy. _She typed but then quickly erased it.

_I know, dude. I missed you too. We should get together again sometime. _She erased that as well. She sighed. Her response would be seen by all of the people Barry had been friends with on Facebook. Including, Maura. Angela. Frankie. Tommy. Vince.

Finally, she decided on something. Her fingers moved quickly as she typed her response on his post.

_Gay._

She closed her laptop and smiled arrogantly. _Rizzoli is still Rizzoli. _

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**Author's Nose: I do this for the tits and giggles. You? Review. **


	2. Dinner With A Rizzoli: Bigfoot Edition

**Author's Nose: I just want to say,_ thank you all_ for your oustanding reviews. I am so glad you guys are enjoying this. By the way, if I call you all lesbians it's just a term of endearment for me. Not an insult.**

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The snow blanketed her street. Everything was white. Everything was cold. She should've been used to it by now. It'd been snowing for a week, and it'd been cold for three weeks. But, there was just something unanticipated about snow. Something she could never get used to. Maybe it was the correspondence with the Holidays. Maybe it was because five years ago around this time, she'd lost her biological father. Maybe it was because her mother had fallen victim in a hit and run accident because the driver was attempting to get _her_. Whatever it was that made this time of year difficult for her, she couldn't help but feel unsocial. She was alone. Not entirely, because Angela Rizzoli made it a habit to always check up on her.

Maura Isles wasn't used to having an overbearing mother but now she had two. Constance Isles was a helicopter mom in her own Constance Isles way. Angela had the system down to a tee.

For the third time today, Angela was calling to check on Maura. For the third time today, Maura felt the urge to take the battery out of her phone.

"Maura." Angela was breathless. She must have been holding her breath until the Medical Examiner answered. "What took you so long?"

"I'm sorry, Angela." Maura frowned as she got out of her car. "I was driving." It wasn't a lie. She was driving. If it hadn't been for the snow and her need for some time away from Angela, she would've answered.

"Oh," She could almost hear Angela nodding. "How are you?"

_The same as I was two hours ago._ "I'm good, Angela." She forced a smile, even though she knew the older woman couldn't see her. At least, she hoped. She knew better than to assume. "How are you?"

"Good." Once again, Maura was sure she could hear Angela nodding. "It's just...I get so lonely around the Holidays. Frankie is always working. Tommy is always working too. I don't have anyone, really."

"I know the feeling." Although she'd had overbearing mothers like Constance and Angela, she still felt alone. It was because she didn't have anyone to come home to. No partner. No children. No one. "What about my mother? She told me she's very fond of you." Maura was lonely, but she wasn't desperate. She'd become accustomed to the feeling.

"I wouldn't want to impose on her and Mr. Isles." Angela's frown was evident in her voice. "Listen...maybe I could come have dinner with you?"

Maura thought for an excuse. Any excuse. She even considered killing one of her neighbors just so she could be first on scene to examine them. _Attractive, Maura. Why don't you tell your therapist how contemplative you are killing others._ "Sure, why not." She let the air out of her cheeks, not realizing she'd been holding her breath in thought.

"Great!" And Angela's smile was evident now. "I'll be over in a jiffy. I'll cook, so you can relax. I know you've had a long hard day." _At least she's aware. _Maura was almost completely devoid of a social life. All of her time mostly went to work. If it didn't, she was surrounded by people from work. The Rizzoli's still joined her for dinner on Sunday nights and she still spoke to Angela at work but they weren't as close as they'd been before. To an outsider, it would have seemed like they'd been closer. But they weren't. They all missed Jane. They were all aware of it. But, none of them would discuss of her.

"I'll see you soon." She said to Angela as she unlocked her door. The older woman said something that she didn't even care to understand. She'd been juggling the phone between her cheek and shoulder. Once she was accessed the inside of her home, she let the phone slip into her hands. Her house was cold. Another reminder of how lonely she'd been. Maura wasn't completely unhappy and depressed. She smiled. She laughed. She had her moments of happiness. But, it was the Holidays. It was this time of year.

The Medical Examiner already knew it was that was unlocking her front door. Angela had moved into an apartment right outside of Maura's neighborhood. So, she didn't think twice about being alarmed of an intruder. She met Angela back in the kitchen when she returned from her bedroom. She rid herself of her heels.

"You look tired, dear." Angela frowned. Maura finally understood what Jane had meant about her mother. The older woman mindlessly said everything that came to mind sometimes. Especially regarding someone's appearance. "Is it the case Frankie is working? What was it...an old man killed in his home just for his property? What has the world come to? Couldn't they let the old coot just die on his own? I mean...he was like eighty right?" She laughed.

Maura smiled. "No, I have Dr. Pike working that case." Angela should have known that. She didn't work any cases with Frankie. She purposely gave them to other examiners. It wasn't because she didn't like Frankie, it was because she didn't want to be reminded of Jane. He was a huge reminder of his sister. They approached cases in the same way. Jumped in with both feet. Most of their leads were guesses that Maura didn't condone of.

"Hmm," The older woman busied her hands as she started the dinner. It wasn't too late to eat. But, it felt like midnight to the Medical Examiner. She'd been so exhausted. "So, there's this man in my building. Says his son is a lawyer." _Here we go, again. _

"Is he?" The honey-blonde played along.

"Yup." Angela nodded. "Defense attorney."

_Oh, that's just unfortunate. _"Good for him." Maura was on her couch now, with her legs tucked under her. Her left foot poked out and she rubbed it.

"He's still single." The older woman said from the kitchen as she chopped away at some vegetables. Vegetables that would lose their protein because Angela was prone to smothering any healthy food in fat.

"I hope he isn't gay like the last lawyer." The Medical Examiner laughed as she searched through the channels.

"I asked." Angela shrugged as she scooped the vegetables up and transported them away from the chopping board. "As far as Giovanni is aware, he's straight."

"Giovanni?" Maura turned.

"The man in my building." The older woman smiled. "Anyways, he showed me a picture of Angelo. He's quite attractive, if you ask me."

_But, I never do. Do I? _Maura had given up on trying to tell Angela no. It was next to impossible to get her to stop searching for Maura's perfect match. "Angelo Alvisio?"

"Yes!" The older woman grinned. "Of course you know him. He works with a lot of your cases."

"I do." She hadn't really _known_ him personally, but she did professionally and she knew that he didn't like Jane. The two always battled against each other. No matter which side they were on, they didn't get along. "Angelo isn't my type."

"You dated Giovanni." Angela stated.

_ Apples and Oranges, Angela. _"Yes." She nodded. "But, that was mostly for his body."

The older woman laughed. "He does have an excellent body. If he were just twenty years older."

"He wouldn't be as sexually active as he is now." Maura supplied with a smile. "I suggest you prefer him at this age." _No need to warn her of the face licking. Jane never warned me._

"True." Angela agreed. "In twenty years he'll probably be as fat as his pop was."

"Most likely." The Medical Examiner turned her attention back to the television. She settled on the Discovery Channel.

"Don't tell me you believe in Bigfoot?" Mrs. Rizzoli asked from the kitchen.

"Hmm?" Maura looked at the TV. _Finding Bigfoot _had been airing. "Oh, heavens no. I believe anything is possible until scientifically proven otherwise. So, I suppose Bigfoot could exist. But, I don't think he does."

"Good." The older woman joined her on the sofa. "Good. Frank. Sr was dead set upon finding one."

"Bigfoot?"

"Yeah." She laughed. "He used to take the kids camping to find one. He thought there were multiple ones." Maura smiled. There was a silence as they watched the men on the television interview some people at a college campus. "Barry is having dinner with her tonight."

"Jane?" She didn't look at the older woman. She kept her eyes glued to the plasma TV.

"Yeah." Mrs. Rizzoli studied Maura's face. It appeared the same, but if only she could hearing the uproarious thoughts in the Medical Examiner's head.

"How is she?" Maura would be lying if she didn't say she didn't think about Jane. She did. Continually. More than she wanted to acknowledge to herself. The last several years of her life weren't the best ones. She'd forgiven Jane. She never really had a choice. Her love for Jane grandstanded any other relationship she had with anyone. It dominated the love she had for anyone else too, including herself. Of course it hurt when Jane killed Patrick Doyle. And she was angry with the detective. She was enraged with her for a long time. But she was _furious_ that the detective_ left._ Without warning. She just turned in her badge and left. For a year Maura grieved for her father but for five years she'd been grieving for the friend she'd lost. She would have known if Jane had died from the other Medical Examiners. She knew the detective was still in Boston but she didn't know much. Barry assured her that Jane was taking care of herself. Maura was skeptical but let it go because she knew she had no right as a best friend to worry anymore. That didn't stop her from worrying, but it stopped her from voicing her concern.

"She's Jane." Angela shrugged. "I talk to her every once in a while. She sounds the same but you know Jane. She's good at hiding how she truly feels. She's good at tricking people into thinking she's fine."

"Right." Maura swallowed hard.

"I hear she's a private investigator now." Mrs. Rizzoli stared at Maura. If the Medical Examiner was uncomfortable, she never let on about it. "Barry says her company is presumed to be one of the best on the East coast."

_Sounds about right. Leave it to Jane to excel at excelling._ "That's good for her."

"I just wish I could get more from her than a phone call." Angela paused for a moment. "I guess it's better than nothing, right? I mean...I get it. She thinks that because we're close, I'll have to choose. I wouldn't. I would never choose between you two. You're both my daughters." Maura only nodded in agreement. "And she's afraid of how weird it'll be. But at least she tries. She tries to stay connected somehow. I do get phone calls. As much as she complained about me, I would've thought she would've stayed as far away from me as possible."

The doctor smiled. "She loves you."

"Then she should come home." The older woman bit back the tears in her eyes. She truly missed her daughter. She didn't care about what happened now. She just wanted her daughter back.

The dinner between the two had been quiet but comfortable. There wasn't much to say. Maura felt guilty and she would always feel guilty for the wedge between Angela and Jane. She felt it was her fault. Although she never asked Angela to pick a side, she feared that the older woman did. That she actually chose Maura over her daughter. Angela would never admit to it but Maura was sure of it. When Angela left for the night, Maura cleaned the dishes. She'd insisted. She needed to keep her hands busy if her mind was going to captivate her. Once she was doing cleaning the dishes, she showered. It was short. Maura went to bed thinking of Jane. Something she was far more than used to.

The next morning, Maura had the day off. Something she wasn't entirely fond of. It meant she couldn't dive elbow deep into body cavity. Instead, she was forced to deal with her bad mood on her own with no distraction. She went to the gym but was only distracted by the men and women that reminded her of Jane. She even took Bass to the vet. It was an excuse to leave the house again. After being diagnosed with a clean bill of health, the honey-blonde took her tortoise back home.

"I wonder if it's too early for spring cleaning." She looked around her home. It was spotless. There wouldn't have been anything to clean. Maura almost missed the vibrations of her cell phone. Barry Frost was calling her. "Hello?"

"Doc," She could hear the smile in his voice. "I've got some good news."

"Has Kelly gone into labor?" Maura had taken special interest in Barry's wife. She was as smart as she was beautiful. Of course, she wasn't as socially awkward as Maura but she did share the same interests.

"What? No!" Barry panicked at the thought. "I mean, I don't think so. Why has she told you she has? Why wouldn't she call me?"

"Frost." Her voice was commandingly soft. "Barry, calm down. Take a few deep breaths." The dark man did as told. Maura waited for thirty seconds. "Everything okay, now?"

"Yeah, sorry." He sighed. "Guess I'm still getting used to all of this."

"I sensed that." Maura held back her laugh. "What is the good news?"

"Huh?" Barry had been completely distracted by his little scare that he'd forgotten why he called her. "Oh, yeah. I guess it's only good news depending on how you look at it." Maura waited, not understanding him. "Okay...I...I had dinner with Jane last night."

"That is good news." _For you. _

"Okay," He sighed. "So you know about Korsak's party right? Frankie told me he invited you."

"Yes." Maura looked down at the mail in her hand. "He did."

"So, you're coming. Right?" His words were anxious. He couldn't decide if he was the barrier of good or bad news.

"I was planning to, yes." She opened the only thing in the envelopes that seemed remotely interesting.

"Don't shoot the messenger." Barry warned. "I, uh, I invited her."

"Her?" Maura looked up from the letter.

"Jane." He breathed.

"Oh." She sighed. "_Oh._"

"If you don't want to come anymore..." He trailed off, unsure if he wanted to give her a chance to opt out.

"I'll still be attending, detective." Her voice was high an octave. She cleared her throat. "This is just a surprise. I haven't seen her in five years."

"Nobody really has." He shrugged on his end of the phone. "But, I mean, if you still hate her..."

"I don't hate her, Barry." That she was sure of. "I'm just a little...surprised."

"I know." He laughed, nervously. "Mrs. Rizzoli is going to pass out."

"You haven't told her yet?" The honey-blonde guessed.

"No." He paused. "She's gonna be my gift to Korsak. Way better than those _dumba-, _Uh, I mean, dumb tickets Frankie got him."

"Very well, then." She quipped. "I'm still going, detective."

"Okay." He nodded. "I'll see you tonight...at eight."

"Tonight at seven." She swallowed.

"Eight." He corrected.

"Detective, I am always early." Even in distress, Maura was still Maura.

Barry laughed on the other end of the phone. "Tonight at seven." The Medical Examiner disconnected the line. Maura let the phone drop to the floor. She was going to see Jane. This changed everything. This changed everything about her program for tonight. She was going to show up, smile and greet everyone. Give Vince his present, then leave. Although Maura always dressed like she was ready to impress, she felt suddenly unfixed about everything in her closet. Everything was off now. Jane was going to be there. She was going to see Jane. After five years of wondering what the detective even looked like, she was going to just nonchalantly run into her at a birthday party.

The thought alone made her nauseous. She was going to _see_ Jane. And there it was. Her breakfast and lunch. So revoltingly displayed on her kitchen floor. Her first instinct would have been to clean it if she hadn't been so mindless. It was as if her soul left her body because dealing with it would've taken more than just throwing up. But she wasn't done. Her throat clenched. Maura dropped to her knees now because running would've just provoked it. Moving in general seemed overexciting.

Maura spent the rest of her day trying to figure out just how civil she should act around Jane. Should she pretend she didn't notice the detective? Should she be honest with herself and everyone else around her and show Jane just how much she'd missed her? What the hell should she do? Angela had called her a few times to make sure she was still attending the birthday party. But, deciding that she just was too anxious to speak to any Rizzoli right now, the Medical Examiner forwarded all of her calls to her voicemail. That didn't do her much justice. That didn't mean she thought Jane any less. She was still nervous. Every second closer to seven only made her even more queasy. She felt like Barry when he'd transferred from Robbery.

Maura had missed a call from her mother. She would've called the woman back right away if she hadn't been trying to create the perfect outfit for tonight. The honey-blonde never really cared that she was outstandingly beautiful and that she dressed accordingly but now she was obstreperously aware of her wardrobe.

_I really _do _dress like I'm going to do a photoshoot. Who knew. Suppose she was right, afterall. _

The medical examiner ran troubled fingers through curly hair. Giving up only momentarily, the honey-blonde picked up her phone. Barry Frost called her twice more. Frankie Rizzoli only once. Even Vince Korsak. Five years ago, she would've thought something had happened to Jane. But, she knew better now. They were all checking up on her.

_Making sure I haven't put myself to death. _

"Bonjour," Constance Isles greeted, pleasantly. "How are you, darling?"

"I am well, mother." The medical examiner tousled her own her in frustration. She wasn't going to find anything to wear. "How are you and father?"

"Father is swell, dear." Constance paused for a moment. "Something the matter?"

"No." Maura tried to lie. "Yes but I would prefer not to discuss of it, right now."

Constance nodded, although her daughter couldn't see it. "We miss you, darling. Promise me you'll visit the estate in New York, soon." After her admission just before being run down with a car, Constance had become the mother she'd always wanted to be. It took some getting used to for both of them but it worked out. Maura visited her mother when she could but if it was impossible for her to get a weekend away, the older woman and her husband would visit their daughter instead.

Maura had given up on trying to find her biological mother. The modification in her relationship with her social mother seemed more prominent. More proving. Of course, that didn't ease her curiosity but it did perturb it for the time being.

"I'm afraid I have plans tonight, mother." The honey-blonde felt a wave of guilt but it was quickly vulcanized when she remembered exactly what she'd be doing tonight. "Next weekend?"

"We will return to England." The older woman's frown was evident in her voice. "Henry and I have a benefit Sunday. Are you free between Tuesday and Thursday, dear?"

Maura could recall her schedule without actually having to look at her planner. She _seriously_ worked most of the time. "If there isn't a case."

"We'll go, anyway." The older woman dismissed. "I'd love to see you for _any_ amount of time."

"Okay." Maura smiled. "I will see you then."

"I love you." Constance quickly said.

"And I love you, mother." Maura grinned before hanging up the phone. She had something to look forward to. She wouldn't spend the Holidays completely alone. Or well, some part of the Holidays.

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**Author's Nose: My nipples say there's a 40% chance of reviews. **


	3. Happy Birthday, You Ol' Lazy Fuck!

**Author's Nose: Still in search for a Beta. I promise I'm not as bitchy as I seemed when I discussed Some Unholy War. Promise.**

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Maura arrived early as promised. Barry was busy setting up the presents and trying to make the bar look as normally as possible if Vince decided to drop by earlier than suspected. Of course, everything so far was going as well as planned with assistance from Melody and Josh.

Maura stood near the bar as she watched Barry work harder than Frankie. The younger detective claimed his indolence had been because he'd spent the day with Vince before the older man's family took over. It was completely bogus but no one tested him on it. Nowadays Vince was _exhausting_. People started to arrive around 7:30, when they'd been expected to arrive. Not all of the entire guestlist showed up. Frankie and Barry were prepared for this. They knew working for BPD meant that you didn't know what night you had off _until_ you had a night off. Those who could make it wouldn't pass it up. Any _reason_ to drink themselves senseless. Maura was far less than thrilled with the approach most men took. They all demanded an alcoholic beverage of their choice and immediately relaxed into pleasantries. Discussing the most horrific cases they'd ever been on. That was what happened at a retiree's birthday party. They would start off discussing the career of the detective, then their own. Which turned into a contest for who has had the worst case of all time at BPD.

"Maura." Angela said as she wiped down the part of the counter she stood at with the towel the bartender had left available.

_So Angela. _

"Yes?" Maura smiled. She'd been listening to the discussion of the three female officers. One of them she was sure was coming on to her but she paid no mind to it because it was a young woman. A woman so young that she would feel like a pedophile for even _thinking _of pursuing.

"I noticed Det. Raymond Hill was staring at your...as-behind." Maura couldn't help but laugh at her friend. "What? What's so funny?"

"You can say _ass_, Angela." The honey-blonde shook her head. Sometimes she wasn't sure how Angela ever raised Jane. Bless her heart. "Though I am not particularly _fond _of foul language, I will not try to change it. There are actually studies that propose using dreadful language relieves tension"

Mrs. Rizzoli thought for a moment. "Anyways," She decided to continue with her original point. "He seems to be _very fond_ of you." The older woman tilted her chin to Maura but she'd been pointing the man behind the honey-blonde.

Maura glanced over her shoulder. She saw a man in his early forties just as she had been. But, he wasn't attractive. At least not to her. His hairline was distinctly receding. His mustache made him look Western and his suit made him look a lot shorter and chubbier than he probably was.

_Please do not approach me. _

"Actually," The Medical Examiner bit back her disgust and subtly pointed to one of Vince's friends from college. She'd met the man at Korsak's retirement party a month before. "I think Robert has a thing for you."

"Ha!" Angela scoffed. "The only thing Robert has a thing for is marrying twenty year olds then leaving them for an even younger woman."

"Hmm." Her statement confused Maura but she wasn't interested enough to care. In fact, she'd been too nervous to really carry a full conversation. How could she when she knew that Jane would be arriving soon? Her eyes always found a way to connect with the watch on her wrist or the clock on the wall.

"He's coming!" The officer who'd been waiting near the door suddenly yelled. Everyone became quiet. Barry had explained the plan to them before. They would all be face away from the windows so the older man wouldn't recognize any of the faces. But, as soon as the door opened, they'd would all turn around and yell surprise. Maura understood the plan. They couldn't turn the lights off in the bar, otherwise Vince would've assumed it'd been closed and went home.

"Mel, I just want to grab a drink." The older man protested to his wife. "It won't take all that lo-" His sentence was cut short when everyone in the joint turned around sharply.

"SURPRISE!" They all yelled in unison. If it hadn't been for his career as a cop, Vince probably would've pulled out his gun and started shooting up the place. Instead, he jumped what seemed like a foot in the air.

"Holy shit!" The older man laughed. The crowd joined him laughter.

"Happy birthday!" It was a chorus.

Vince turned to his wife and son. "You had this planned didn't you?" He accused with a mock glare.

"Actually," Melody stepped around her husband. "Frost and Rizzoli had it all planned out." She grabbed the two men by one of their shoulders and shuttled them to the retiree. "Tell them how surprised you are."

"You knew, didn't you?" Frankie asked.

Vince nodded. "Sorry, kid. I'm a better detective than you give me credit for."

"Not a detective anymore." Barry reminded. "But trust me, I've got something you don't see coming."

"I doubt it." The older man shrugged. Then he stepped around the younger detectives to look at the crowd of people who'd assumed their prior positions and conversations. "Who wants to buy me a drink, huh?" There was a wave of cheers and every person in the place congratulated Vince on surviving another year. Even Maura.

Jane had been at the office. She knew she shouldn't have been but she'd been working on a case for a company was very important at the moment. They were paying her a lot and to be honest the case was really absorbing. It was a franchise restaurant that had been too afraid to go to the police. They'd found traces of Meth in their food when they'd been successfully sued at least three times. The lawsuits were racking up and they couldn't take it anymore. They'd wanted Jane to get to the bottom of it.

"Paul," She swirled in the chair at her desk as she looked at the large LCD screen across from her desk. "Do you see that?"

The Tech Analyst looked up from the document in his lap then turned his head to see where his boss had been pointing to. He'd been sitting across from Jane at her desk. "Looks like someone's pouring something in the food."

"They are." Jane smiled. "Who does that look like to you?"

"I...I don't know, boss." He sighed.

"_Look._" She encouraged as she zoomed in on the video. It displayed a young woman pouring the Meth into the seasoning.

"...Is that Bailey King?" He squinted up at the screen.

"Yes." The detective smiled. She already had known Bailey King – the first woman to sue the company over being drugged – was the culprit the entire time. She just needed proof. Now, she had it. She just needed to go back far enough. The woman had tainted seasoning that wouldn't be used for another month or so. And so a month later, she wandered in to resume her plan.

"Good job." He plumed.

"Thank you." Jane turned the LCD Screen off. "Anyways, I got a party to get to." She looked at her watch. "We're done for the night."

"I can go home?" He seemed almost hopeful.

"Yes." She laughed. "Yes, you can go home." She didn't hire Paul Griffin because he was tech savvy. She'd hired him because he resembled Tommy in looks. He had a sad story behind him as well. He was bounced around from foster home to foster home until one family finally decided to adopt him. He had a hard childhood but he never let that get in the way of how successful he was going to be. And as far as she knew, he never used it as an excuse not to achieve. He was determined. One of the many qualities _all _of her employees had. The detective quickly put on her blazer as she walked around her desk.

"See you Monday, boss." Paul said from the office door. Jane nodded but didn't respond. She would have to lock up. She was just about to turn the lights off in her office with the phone on her desk shrilled. She assumed it was Barry and she was going to call him when she got into her car.

The ride from JR Investigations to the Dirty Robber was short. She was late. She knew it. The party had started at eight and it was already ten. But from the outside, it seemed like the party had just begun. Jane called Barry as she parked her car.

"Where the hell are you?" He demanded. He was almost drunk. He had to have been to question her like that.

"I'm outside. Damn." She laughed.

"You're late." She watched him sway through the window.

_Definitely drunk. Still can't hold your liquor, Barry White Snow Frost. _ "Don't piss your floral panties. Give me a minute."

"Wait, wait!" He turned to Vince, who was whispering something in Melody's ear. Something no one but Melody wanted to hear. "Korsak. Korsak. Korsak." The dark man repeated in different tones until he got his old sergeant's attention. "I know you think that Rizzoli's present was the best."

"Superbowl tickets." Vince stated. "By far the best gift of tonight."

"Are you sure?" Barry grinned. "I have something a thousand times better."

"The party was great but kind of ruined, Frost." Vince smiled. "But thanks for the effort."

"No, dickhead." Barry shook his head. "I have the best gift." He backed to the door. Jane kept her face hidden. He grabbed the brunette's arm more harshly than she would have liked him to. When he pulled her into the bar, there was a song of gasps.

_Jane Rizzoli, you sure know how to knock em' speechless. _

"Jane." Was all Vince could muster. He stared the woman before him. The woman he hadn't spoken to in five years. The woman he hadn't seen in five years. Sure, she'd been in the same city as him and at times he wanted to just track her down and demand she speak to him. But, Jane made it clear she didn't want anything to do with _anyone_ for a while.

"Oh my God." Melody walked around her stone-still husband. "It's so nice to see you, Jane." She'd been the bravest of them all. They all stared, stunned. Melody wrapped her arms around the tall detective.

"Thanks." Jane whispered. "It's nice to see you too." She kept her eyes on Vince. Her words for both of them. When Vince's wife pulled away, the bar was booming with talk now. Everyone seemed to be sketched to their previous discussions.

"Janie." Frankie pushed past Vince to hug his sister. "Man is it good to see you."

"Whoa there, Frankie." Jane laughed as he pulled away. "When did you grow a vagina?"

He hit his sisters arm. "Shut up!"

"Alright, alright." She smiled.

"Ma is going to pass out." Frankie looked around for their mother. "She's probably in the restroom with the Doc."

Jane's heart fluttered. "What?" She swallowed hard. She actually hadn't been planning on seeing Maura. She knew there was a chance Maura would be there but she'd only hoped. Everything in her wanted to see the Medical Examiner, and that was the very reason why she shouldn't.

"Maura." Barry whispered.

It took her a moment but she finally said something. "Vince, you just gonna stand there and or are you gonna finally let your balls drop?"

The older man glared at her for a moment but then grinned. "It's nice to see you, Rizzoli." He pulled her into a tight hug. A hug that was evident that he was making sure she was real and he wasn't just too drunk.

"Alright, alright ya big ol' gallon of shit." She pulled away. Her eyes swept the room. Maura and Angela hadn't returned from the restroom yet. "That's enough." The group of detectives laughed.

"What are you up to now?" Frankie asked as he pulled his sister to the bar. "I hear you're a big hotshot private investigator."

"Oh, yeah." She laughed. "Female Magnum P.I." She received a laugh from all of the men.

_Man these guys are on their best behavior. This is what happens when you're pussy whipped._

"Seriously, though." Frankie took a swig of his beer. "What company you work for?"

"JRI." The brunette shrugged.

"I hear they're good." Vince said as he looked to the other two men. "Heard they solved the Hilltop case before NYPD did."

"You fucks do realize I founded the company, right?" Jane asked. "JRI. As in, Jane Rizzoli Investigations."

It took Vince and Frankie a moment but after the persistent stare from Jane, they both gasped. "You did?" Vince patted his old partner on the back. "Fucking amazing, Janie! I knew there was something about you from your first day as my partner."

"You had me doing coffee runs my first day as your partner, Korsak." The brunette pulled the beer the waiter had left to her lips. "You didn't know jack shit." Vince smacked his lips but didn't respond with anything but a laugh.

Maura had been refreshing Angela's make-up in the restroom. After the older woman confided that she was positive she wouldn't be leaving the gathering alone, Maura couldn't help the amusement that danced on her features.

"Thank you for doing this." Angela said as Maura retouched the older woman's eye-liner. "I'm determined to take someone home tonight. You know it's been three months?"

"Three months?" Maura questioned as she began working on Angela's left eye.

"Since I last achieved an orgasm." Mrs. Rizzoli stated as if she'd been telling someone the weather. "At least with the help of someone else."

Maura could hear Jane squealing and begging for mercy in her head. "Good luck. It'll be difficult to find a man your age at this party that can achieve an _erection_." She could also see Jane in her head staring at her with a flat face. _Terrible joke. _

Angela chuckled then clucked her tongue. "Maybe I should become a cougar." The older woman sighed. "Mary Panelli is dating someone _your_ age." Maura wasn't sure if she should know who Mary Panelli was, but was positive it'd been one of Angela's friends. "She says he has no problem with stamina."

"A man _my_ age?" Maura scoffed. "Maybe I should take interest in his siblings."

"He only has a sister." The older woman frowned. Maura was going to say something about the gender not really mattering but decided against it. "Anyways, I think I can find someone here. Frankie's friends used to always say I was the _'hot mom' _on the block."

"There. All done." Maura stepped aside to let the older woman look at herself in the mirror. She actually was beautiful. With or without make-up. "If this doesn't turn heads, I don't know what will."

Angela winked at the Medical Examiner. "We hall see." She grinned. "Thank you." Both women smiled at each other then Maura washed her hands. She'd given up hope on Jane's arrival. She was sort of glad the detective had skipped out on the party. The entire thing was giving her an ulcer. Now, she could simply enjoy the party. With her friends.

_Because, I have friends. On certain nights. When I'm not choosing to ignore them. _

Angela opened the restroom door but then stopped in her tracks. She saw Jane. Just sitting there like you could find her there every night in the bar for the last five years. She just sat there like she belonged there. She had a beer in one hand and her phone in the other as she snapped away. She took pictures of everything. Everyone. Didn't matter if she knew them or not. She just took pictures. She took periodic swigs of her beer. And laughed. The smile on her face never wavered. She laughed when Frankie patted her on the back.

_Like she's been doing this for years. _

Maura had been unmindful of Angela's behavior until she was ready to leave the restroom. The older woman stood still as she watched her daughter. It was like a dream. And she had had plenty of them. Just the chance to have Jane back into her life. And then Maura saw her. The detective acting as if she didn't have a care in the world. Her guard had never been so far down around her friends before. Maura could tell. But, she could tell she was being searched for. Because Jane's eyes swept the bar again, slowly. Finally settling on Maura, they widened. Then a smirk claimed her face.

_She still looks the same. Smokin' hot. _

The detective tried her damn best to notice her mother standing in front of Maura. It would've been easier if she hadn't been wearing clown make-up. Finally her eyes moved, just as her mother did.

"Janie, oh my God!" The older woman was in front of her now. Pulling her into a tight hug. A hug that wasn't like the others. It wasn't a hug to see if they were all just hallucinating off of good ass beer. No, this hug was to prove to Jane just how much she'd been missed. If she didn't already know it before, she knew it now.

"Can't. Breath. Ma." Jane gasped. Maura, a few seats down the bar only just observed with a smile. A smile that was perfectly Maura. Didn't deflect any of her negative feelings. Just how happy she was to finally see Angela happy.

"I don't care!" Angela swatted her daughter's arm, still embraced in the hug. "You've been breathing for five years without me! Give me a minute!" The detective slumped and abandoned all protests. It took longer than a minute. It took about five minutes. In that time, Jane managed to snake her arms around her mother to snap more pictures. She even took pictures of herself making funny faces in her mother's death grip.

_You haven't changed a bit. _

"Ugh," Angela groaned. "You've ruined my make-up." She pulled away.

"What's this about anyway?" The brunette gestured to her mother's face. "Got a boyfriend I don't know about?"

"You wouldn't know about anything," Angela made a face. "But for your information. No, I do not have a boyfriend. At least not yet." Then Angela scanned the room to decide which man would fall victim. She wasn't going to attack just yet.

"You look pretty, Ma." The detective's compliment started off as a normal vocalization but curved into a whisper.

"Thank you." Mrs. Rizzoli grinned. "I missed you, Jane."

"I know." Jane nodded. "And, I'm sorry."

"Yeah?" Angela glared. "I wish I'd had more than some phone calls. How would I know you're alive? Anyone could fake your voice."

"Yes, Ma." Jane rolled her eyes. "Anyone could fake my hoarse ass voice. Where, just where, have you found anyone that sounds like me? Because if you have, I need to get in touch with them. Maybe we could go to _Hollywood a_nd get a show about cacophonic voices."

Angela glared at her daughter. But, Jane appeared angelic and innocent. "You're still immature, I see."

"I'm not immature." The detective protested with a grin. "I'm just...honest. In a funny way."

"Right." Mrs. Rizzoli was too happy to argue. Five years ago, she would have rolled her eyes and sighed heavily at her daughter but right now, she was happy just to have any piece of Jane she could. She was going to pass out from the abundance of Jane.

"Rizzoli," Vince cleared his throat. Frankie and Jane turned to the older man. "I meant Jane. Sorry Frankie." He didn't even bother to look at the younger man. "Take a picture with me. I want to show the kids at the daycare on my street the ghost of Jane Rizzoli."

Jane punched his arm. "Shut up." She laughed. Angela turned back to Maura, who still had been glued to the bar. She wasn't drinking. It actually seemed like she was nervous. Her smile had faltered.

"You okay?" Mrs. Rizzoli grabbed Maura's shoulder, lightly. "Maybe you should sit down." She pulled out a barstool.

"A million memories just hit me like a wave." The Medical Examiner winced at her own exaggeration. "I mean, I was reminded of the sudden memory of everything I've been trying to forget."

"Me too." Angela agreed as she watched her daughter crack up. Vince had told cracked a joke just before their picture was taken. "But, for tonight. I think I'm going to _actively disregard _the past. What she did and what we all did by letting her leave so easily. I'm going to enjoy having my daughter. And you should enjoy seeing your best friend."

_Best friend. _Maura internally scoffed. _Can she even still be considered that to me?_

She looked at Jane, who looked at her but then looked away when another one of her old friends demanded her attention. From the wave of jumbles in her chest and the symphony of butterflies in her belly, Maura sighed.

_Apparently so._

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**__Author's Nose: Be a dear, and review for Leasbian, please?**


	4. I'm Still Immature You're Still Smart

**Author's Nose: You guys, oh my God, you guys. I have never been so freaking happy to get feedback. I'm like overwhelmed with love right now. You all are so fucking amazing and beautiful and I simply couldn't deprive you of an update after all of your abundance of love. Thank you all, so fucking much and I hope I didn't lose your interest. **

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Jane had never been so emotionally operational. She was willing to do almost anything at this point. If someone offered to go kill the frat boy Barista down at Starbucks, she would've been down. She would've regretted it the next morning, but she was willing. Vince had his arm snaked around her shoulders to keep her glued at his side. Normally, she would've been okay with that. But, it seemed like Maura was patiently waiting her turn with the brunette. She could sense the Medical Examiner watching her. She could sense half of the party trying their damned best not to get caught watching her but the only person who didn't care if she saw – or if anyone else saw – was Maura.

"Best. Damn. Present. Ever." Vince was drunk. "Sorry, Rizzoli." The apology was aimed to Frankie.

The younger Rizzoli put his hands up. "I completely understand." He laughed. "I'm starting to feel like it's my birthday too."

"God," Jane shook her head. "You guys turn into a bunch of girls or something?"

"That's what happens when you're not here," The bartender said over the loud laughter. "when you're not here to kick their asses. These men have their balls so far _up_."

Vince flipped the man off, but the bartender just laughed. Jane however, looked over at Maura again. This time the Medical Examiner had been distracted. She had been approached by some guy Frankie's age.

"Who's that?" She whispered to her brother. He looked over his shoulder.

"Cal." He smiled. "Calvin Hawthorne."

"Calvin Hawthorne." Jane repeated with acid. "_Who _is he?"

"Friend of Vince's from the Hilton." The younger Rizzoli said, as if it were nothing. It wasn't _nothing_. At least, it wasn't to Jane. She never knew what it was but she enjoyed watching men approach Maura just to be turned down. But, when the men were successful it got beneath her skin. She wanted to yell. She wanted to scream. "He's good people, Jane. Don't worry." Frankie was under the impression Jane was trying to _look out_ for Maura.

_Sure. Let's go with that. _

"Right." She quipped as she turned her body entirely to face the two people. Vince didn't seem to notice. Instead, he snaked his vacant arm around his wife instead. Jane wasn't sure if she should interrupt. She _wanted_ to because whatever this guy was saying was making Maura laugh. The honey-blonde giggled at his joke and rested her hand on his arm. Jane glared.

"Are you jealous?" The bartender asked, watching the detective. "Of him?" He tilted his head to the two.

"What?" She didn't look away. _Probably just proved his point. Oh well._

"Don't play stupid, Rizzoli." It took her a moment to recall his name. _Jimbo? Jimmy? Timmy? Tommy? No, that's my brother. Tom? Nope, still my brother. What the fuck is his name? Vinny! Oh, right. Vinny. _"I know it's been awhile since I last seen you but I know how you felt about her. Call it a Bartender's Intuition."

"Fuck are you talking about?" She still didn't bother looking at the man.

"The way you're watching her now." He laughed. "Looks like you want to stab that man in the most painful way in the most painful place with the most painful thing."

"What?" She turned to him, finally. Only because Maura had laughed again and_ Calvin_ had stepped closer to her. _Too much to bear._

"Bet you're planning on getting him alone to saw his dick off with a butter knife." His guess was strangely accurate or maybe Jane was just that easily perceptive. "I'm right on the money." He self-congratulated.

"Whatever." She pulled her beer to her lips. It was empty. "I need a new one." She tilted her bottle to him.

"You drivin' home?" Vinny asked. "Can't be responsible for any deaths."

"What about that poor sailor girl that died her like six years ago?" The man was quiet. "Thought so."

"At least find someone to take you home." He took the bottle from her but didn't retrieve a new one just yet. He waited for her to promise.

"Alright, alright." She surrendered. "I'll get one of these..." She waved her hand quickly. "I'll get one of these kind people of the _Boston Police Department _to take me home." _Or somewhere near it. No way am I letting _anyone_ know where I live now. _

"That'll do." He smiled before he walked away. Jane tried to look _everywhere_ that Maura wasn't. It wasn't easy. Maura was a slender woman but somehow managed to_ always _end up in Jane's line of vision. Maybe it was Jane's fault. She couldn't help but look in the direction of the Medical Examiner. She pursed her lips when Vinny looked to her from across the bar then looked away. She was just about to start analyzing the look when she felt movement next to her. _Don't you dare turn to look at her. You pussy. _

"Jane," Maura was still smiling from whatever joke _Calvin _had left her with.

"Maura." She appeared angry. Irritated. But, her words were soft.

"It's been difficult to get a moment alone with you." They stood there. Right next to each other. A proximity that wasn't new to them but it felt _different_. Nice. Something she would've been used to – and quite frankly _preferred – _five years ago. "You are _very _popular."

Jane wasn't sure if she should take that as a compliment so she was quiet for a moment in thought. "Right." She looked across the room to her mother, who'd been flirting with someone that looked closer than Josh's age. "What the fuck is she doing?" It was rhetorical but Maura was going to answer it anyway.

"She's considering becoming a _cougar._" Amusement danced from Maura's lips in the form of words. "I admire her for expanding her preferences. Younger men are far more sexually active."

"She's about the age of a _corpse_!" Jane hissed. "She doesn't need _sexual activity_." Maura laughed. _God, that sounded nice. I want to hear it again. _

"She's still a woman, Jane." There was that disapproving tone but Jane knew it wasn't sincere. She knew what true disappointment felt like, _especially _from Maura. That wasn't it. "I'm sure at her age, you'll be trying to...how should I put this? Interested in _fucking _anything that will _get you off._" The words stunned Jane speechless. She stared blankly across the room.

"Wow," The detective bit her lip. "This what I missed? Maura cusses now. Wow. Guess I've truly seen everything now. Take me Lord, I am ready." Maura chuckled. _Man, she must be drunk or something. _

"I was just testing new territory." The Medical Examiner shrugged. "It doesn't suit me. It isn't familiar and I most likely won't try it again."

"It suits you." Jane complimented, slyly. "Probably language that should stay in the bedroom, though."

"Trust me, Jane," Maura licked her lips. "My _bedroom_ language doesn't sound _anything_ like that." Of course, she hadn't really been sure anymore. Her dry spell was longer than Angela's. A year since her last orgasm. From another partner and from herself.

"_Alright,_ then." The Detective tried to wet her lips but her tongue felt dry. "Maybe you should take _Calvin _home."

"Calvin?"

_She's going to play innocent. _"You know, Calvin? The guy you spent the last five minutes giggling over." The brunette shook her head as she reached for an abandoned beer._ Completely unsafe but I need it. _"But for the life of me, I don't know what could possibly be _that _funny."

Maura seemed completely oblivious that Jane had just stolen a beer from a stranger. "He told me a joke."

Finally, Jane looked at her. Giving her that look that Maura had received after she'd made a bad joke herself. "A joke?" The detective stared. "What like a knock knock joke? What was it? 'knock, knock' 'who's there' 'the square root of pi'?"

_I missed her sarcastic sense of humor. _"_No._" Maura glared. "What does the zero say to the eight?"

Jane looked at her old friend. "I don't know, Maura. _What?_"

"Nice belt." The honey-blonde smirked. Jane's eyes narrowed. _I can't believe I ever missed that look_. "It's silly now that I think about it."

"Oh, _now_ it's silly?" The detective retorted. "Still the same, Maur." She shook her head.

"I've changed." The doctor defended.

"_How?_" Jane scooped all of the nuts from the small bowl into her hand.

"I just am." Maura wasn't offended. Jane seemed to be unconvinced but let it go. She brought her fist to her mouth and tried to drop as many nuts into it as she could. "_You're_ still the same, I see." The honey-blonde commented. Jane glanced at her as she chewed. "But, I can see you_ have _changed in some ways."

"How?" Her question was muffled.

"Well, not just physically." Maura gestured down the length of the detective's body. "You seem to carry yourself more confidently."

"I gotta," The brunette shrugged. "When I walk into a meeting with clients, they don't want someone who's hunched over and depressed. They want someone they can trust. Someone who will get the job done."

_That has always been you, Jane. _"Well it works." Maura smiled.

"Thanks." Jane chugged down the remaining beer from the bottle to wash out the taste of the stale nuts. "Ay,_ Vinny._ What happened to my drink?" She called.

"I'm working on it, Rizzoli!" The man lied. He really just wanted to give the two women some time alone. They obviously needed it.

"So," Jane clapped her hands clean of the salt. "What have you been up to?"

Maura made a face in thought. _God, she's adorkable. Did I just say that? _"Work." She summed with a shrug. "Nothing interesting has really been happening in my personal life."

"Seeing anyone?" She knew the answer to that. _If she's been chattin it up with Calvin, she obviously isn't going home to a man. At least a man she _wants_, anyway. _

"No." She hadn't been in an actual relationship for five years. She always pawned it off as work, but she intentionally _made_ herself busy just as an excuse not to date. Sex on the other hand. Sex was something she used as crutch for the first four years. A way to express her anger. But, she finally decided it was time to deal with the pain like a normal human being. That was what Jane had always wanted from her. For her to experience things the way others did. _So I wouldn't feel left out._ "What about you?"

Jane thought about the question. "Not in the day time."

Maura laughed, despite the swelling jealousy. "That's new. Normally you didn't have time to see men at night, either."

"Men." Jane scoffed. _Haven't slept with a man since Dean. What a fucking mistake that was. _

"Did things not work out with Gabriel?"

_Who? _"Uh..."

"Agent Dean." The Medical Examiner smirked. _Is it odd that I'm happy she doesn't remember him? It's odd. Oh well, thankfully I'm safe in my own thoughts. _

"Ha," Jane made a face. "No. I think I only thought I liked him because he could understand the demand of the job."

_I could understand the demand too, Jane. _"Hmm." The honey-blonde stared at her old friend. Jane really had changed. She seemed more comfortable with herself. Confident, too. There was just something about her that was sexually attractive. _Who am I kidding? She's always been sexually attractive. But, now, I'm feeling the need to have her carry me out of the bar with those_ very_ strong arms and have her way with me. _Maura hadn't missed the muscle the brunette had collected. It looked good on her. She seemed to find a perfect balance of masculinity and feminism. She was still skinny but she was more toned and Maura had definitely noticed.

"I think...I'm going to go say hi to some of the boys." Jane used her thumb to point behind her. Maura nodded, although she hadn't wanted her time with the detective be over; she understood. It was Jane's first day back.

_Why would she want to spend it with me? _

"It was nice seeing you again, Jane." The Medical Examiner tried to summon a sincere smile. It looked pathetic. If Jane was freaked out by it, she didn't say anything.

"You too." The Detective frowned. _Shouldn't even bother to smile. _"See you around." _Not._ The detective walked away before Maura could offer a day and time.

Maura spent the next hour trying to use anything and anyone to occupy her mind. It didn't work. She'd found her way back to Calvin but his jokes had obviously been stolen from Google in hopes he would get the chance to use them on the good doctor. So, she decided to see what news she could get out of Angela.

"Found any prey yet?" She asked behind the older woman.

Angela turned around. "Yes." But she frowned. "But, none of them are who I want."

"Who do you want?" The Medical Examiner swept the room. No one other than Jane Rizzoli seemed remotely attractive by her standards.

"Someone strong," The older woman lifted her arms slightly to emphasize. "Fit."

"Most of the men here are friends of Korsak." Maura smiled. "They're not fit."

"I _know_." Angela groaned in frustration. "It sucks. I can't be a cougar. I feel like I'm fondling one of my sons." Both women grimaced.

"I can understand your frustration." Maura empathized. Angela looked defeated, and because the Medical Examiner couldn't offer any fun factoids of advice this made her look equally defeated.

Jane had been getting more drunk than usual. Lately, she gave herself a limit. But secretly watching Maura bounce from man to man in the room only made her gulp down whatever alcoholic beverage before her. Vince had been catching her up on his life but she hadn't really been paying attention. She felt bad about it because any other day at any other time when Maura wasn't there to distract her, she would've listened. She would've been interested. But, right now, Maura looked like she was trying to find a man to take home. It bothered Jane.

"Right, Janie?" Vince stepped into her line of view.

"Huh?" _Move, you fat fuck. _She tried to look over his head. All she could see was the Medical Examiner with Angela.

"I said, you used to be just skin and bones." He pinched her arm. "Got some meat on em' now."

"Looks like muscle." Frankie pinched her other arm. Jane hadn't realized when she'd rid herself of her blazer. But now she wore just a red v-neck shirt with black slacks.

"Yeah," She finally pulled her eyes off the honey-blonde. "Got hard trying to secretly investigate people when the wind kept blowing me away." The men laughed. _Pussy whipped. Wasn't even that funny._ "You seein' anyone, Frankie?"

"Me?" He pointed to himself. _Yeah you, dumbass. _"Nah." He shook his head. "Job always comes first. Right?"

_Gotta stop trying to be like, Frankie. It's not worth it._ "Right." She nodded, firmly.

Another hour passed and everyone agreed it was time to start going home. Most people had work in the morning, and if they were lucky, they wouldn't wake up dead from the hangovers they would have. Jane was definitely going to fall victim.

_Can't drive my baby home. I don't want to have her wrapped around a tree in five minutes. _

"I'm not fit to drive." Barry announced as he dropped his keys into the bartender's hat. "I'm definitely going to need a ride." He looked at Jane.

"Don't look at me." She swayed. "I'm drunker than you." To be honest, she wasn't even sure if she were saying the words right. Incomprehensible sentences could've been coming out her mouth. She was too drunk to tell. Or care.

Barry walked away – the closest he could get to walking – to find someone. Meanwhile, Maura had been abandoned by Angela. Who'd been drunk enough to go home with one of the repugnant men.

"Hey, Doc." Vinny said as he collected some keys from some officers. "Mind taking this one home?" He tapped the hat against Jane's shoulder. She groaned but didn't move.

"I'll get her home safe." Maura promised. A smirk claiming her features. "Come on, Jane."

"No." The detective moaned. "Leave me here to die." She'd made a cave of her arms.

"Let's go." The Medical Examiner bit back her amusement. She couldn't help her smile but she'd be damned if she laughed. "I'll leave you to die in your own home."

Jane took a deep breath then let it out sharply. "Fine." She looked at Barry. "Hey, found a ride. Let's go, Barry Snow White Frost."

"With you two?" The dark man looked at the two, becoming dizzy immediately. "Oh, God. I think I'll get a ride with...Josh!" He called to Vince's son. "Give your great uncle Barry a ride home."

Jane shook her head. _Pussy. _

"Well, if he's carpooling with the Korsaks, I'm going to get you home now." Maura wasn't sure where to grab Jane. The brunette was obviously having difficulty carrying herself.

"I got this," The detective tried to say coolly. Maura stood back to watch the detective stumble twice and catch herself on the rim of a table.

"Jane, you're falling over your own two feet." The honey-blonde shook her head. "Here." She wrapped her arms around the brunette's waist from behind. Jane was going to protest, but it felt too nice. Having Maura's arms wrapped around her. For years, she'd imagined mornings just standing on the balcony in her master bedroom to have the woman sneak up behind her and wrap her arms around her. It never happened. Because Maura didn't exist in her world anymore.

* * *

**Author's Nose: So, yesterday, at work I got locked into the restroom for fifteen minutes. I forgot my phone at my desk so I couldn't call one of my coworkers. I'd never been so freaking scared in my life. I literally thought the apocalypse was happening outside of that restroom. Little fun story. Oh and last night I conned my sister into buying me a soda then got her to buy it back from me. Hahah. I'm so evil. Good lord. **


	5. Seduce Her While She's Drunk

Once in the car, Maura had never experienced Jane so vocal. The detective talked about _anything _and _everything _but the directions to her new home.

"Where do you live?" The Medical Examiner asked for what felt like the hundredth time. She'd driven around the same block five times so far. _ Very unsafe for the environment. _

"One time," Jane chuckled. "I was investigating this guy's wife, right? He was this big fat ass like Korsak." She rounded her arms in front of her belly. "Real insecure. He thought she was cheating on him with someone from the gym because that's where she always said she was."

"Where do you live?" Maura repeated. Circling the block once more.

"Turned out, she was working at KFC to pay off credit card debt she had from her twenties that she didn't want him to know about. She thought he wouldn't love her if he knew she didn't come from a rich family like him." The brunette shook her head then rested it on the window and sighed. "The things insecure people do for love."

Maura stopped the car. "_Jane_." She said through clenched teeth. "_Where do you live?_"

"Go north." The Detective pointed. "Drive slow. I'm feeling nauseous." The Medical Examiner nodded and followed the brunette's instructions. "I have this assistant," She fired up again. "Eve." She chuckled. "She's freaking scary. She's just like you. I think that's why I hired her. When I bring someone home, she kicks them out for me, she has my six. Reminds me of nanny from Arthur." Maura gave her a confused look. Jane sighed. "Of course you have no idea what I'm talking about. Arthur was this rich Britt in New York. He had mommy issues. His dad died or something and his mother was never home. She was too busy running a company. So she hired this nanny after his father died when he was like three. This woman took care of him better than his own mom. So, he kind of grew up seeing her as a parental figure. He was arranged to be married to the woman that would take over the company for his mother but he fell in love with some normal woman."

Maura smiled at the plot.

"He was a spoiled brat and couldn't support himself to save his life." Jane made a face. "It was kind of sad, really." She sighed. "Anyways, of course he ended up leaving the woman he was supposed to marry for the woman he loved. The nanny died, though."

"Sounds like an interesting movie."

"They made a remake of it with Russell Brand," Jane licked her lips. "Kind of sucked."

"Nothing ever compares to the original." Maura eyed the detective. But then focused her eyes back on the road, waiting for further instruction.

"Eve's husband is funny." The brunette laughed, suddenly. "He's always going on about how me and her would make a – get on the high way – better couple than him and her would." Maura seemed thoroughly perplexed. But Jane paid no mind. "Got this new employee," She sniffled. "Paul. He's scared shitless of me. I think Tony fucks with him, you know? I think they try to scare him into being better at his job. Kind of pointless. Get off at exit nineteen. I like the kid and he knows it. But he's still pretty fucking terrified."

_A drunk Jane is not censored Jane._ "Interesting." Maura really did try to follow along. Really.

"But, I like that Eve sends the women away for me." This caught Maura's attention. _Women?_ "I mean, I don't say stupid shit like men to get them into bed. I don't tell them I'm looking for a soul mate and I'm ready to settle down. I tell them I'm just looking for someone to fuck. Women fall for the truth just well as they fall for lies."

"Women." The Medical Examiner repeated. _I'm not surprised. I knew she would eventually learn about her sexuality, I'm just surprised she's admitting to it so vociferously. Then again, she_ is_ drunk. She most likely won't remember this in the morning. _

"So, why do they try to stick around in morning and get breakfast and a marriage proposal out of me?" Jane sighed in frustration. "I hate it."

"I'm sorry." The honey-blonde couldn't hide her amusement. She preferred to ignore her jealousy, though.

"Take the next right." The detective instructed. "I mean, it's not _your _fault! Eve thinks it is. She thinks you ruined me for relationships. We never dated, though. But she thinks we did. I mean, sure, in a way some would consider our friendship a relationship. I was willing to do anything you asked. Hell, I still am."

_Wait, what? _

"And I thought I was in love with you. At one point, I really did. But then Dan came along." _Dean._ Maura wanted to laugh at the mistake. "And I thought what I felt for you was just something friends should feel for their best friends. I thought what I had with Dan was normal."

"Normal?" The honey-blonde frowned.

"You can drop me off right here." Jane shook her head in attempt to sober herself. She'd already forgotten what she'd been talking about. "I'll walk the rest of the way."

"Don't be ridiculous, Jane." The Medical Examiner looked at the Detective. "It's midnight. I don't care how safe this area is, you're not walking home by yourself in this state." She gestured to Jane who was showing an inability to keep her eyes open.

Jane wanted to protest but she knew better. She was tired and that would only mean bad news if she got out of the car now. "Alright, take a left." She rubbed her eyes and Maura did as told. "My pin is zero-five-seven-six."

It took Maura less than a moment as she pulled up to the front gate of a very gated community. "My birth date?" Jane only nodded. "Why?" The brunette only replied with a shrug. It was a gesture that told her to let it go. For now, she would. Although it would've been easier to press now than any other time.

"Just keep driving. I'll tell you when we reach my place." The detective's eyes were closed.

_Please don't fall asleep. I am too tired to carry you. _"Okay." The Medical Examiner licked her lips. Jane was beautiful in her tired state. One of the many things Maura didn't know she missed until she realized she missed it. She'd seen Jane this way before. Drunk and tired. She hadn't seen the brunette as chatty but she had versed a very drunk Jane before. Although she knew that she had to be the voice of reason in the past and inform the brunette about the harms of binge drinking, she couldn't help but feel something cozy around her heart whenever Jane let down all of her walls.

"Eve helped me pick this place out." The brunette pointed. "I was going to go with some penthouse apartment." She laughed. "Apparently that's so _bachelor _of me."

"It's beautiful, Jane." Sincerity pinned Maura's words. The house was beautiful. It looked expensive. But beautiful. It wasn't a mansion and it looked like Jane didn't care about what the house looked like because she only shrugged and climbed – or well tried to – out of the car as fast as she could. "Let me help you." The honey-blonde wrapped her arms around the brunette again. She could smell the fragrance bedded with sweat on the detective's skin. A faint lavender musk that was just simply _Jane._

"I'm fine." The brunette protested, although her feet betrayed her when they tripped over themselves.

_God damn you. _

"I can't trust you alone, I'm sorry." Maura admitted as Jane reached for her keys. The detective only shrugged but didn't press. Instead she unlocked the door and swung it open as quickly as possible.

"Got a new dog." The detective smiled, already forgotten what they'd been discussing. "Named her Sadie Monday."

"How..." Maura couldn't find the right word.

"Yeah," Jane fell into the couch. "_I_ like it." She shrugged.

The Medical Examiner didn't know what to do with herself now. She wanted to stay to make sure Jane was okay, but what harm could the detective really get into in her own home? "Well, you're home safely." She sighed. "I should get going."

Jane sat up on her elbows. "Where are you going?"

"Home." Maura frowned.

"But..." The detective fell back and looked at her watch. "It's almost one. Not safe. You can take my bedroom or one of the spare rooms."

_I would much rather your bedroom. _"Really, Jane. It's fine. There isn't much harm someone can do to me while I'm _inside_ of my car."

"They could mug you when you're walking to your door." The brunette argued. "Just...please? Stay here. You can leave as early as you want, tomorrow. I just don't want something to happen to you."

_Five years later and she's still looking out for me._ Maura smiled. "Okay." She nodded. "First, maybe we should change you into something more comfortable." Jane thought about protesting but decided against it. She was too lazy to even argue. Maura helped peel the detective from the couch and half-carried half-dragged the brunette to the nearest bedroom.

"My room's down the hall." Jane sat down on the bed. Maura started with her shirt, pulling it over her head.

"I'll find something in a moment." The doctor whispered. She knelt down to remove the detective's shoes. _She still wears these hideous things. _"You're going to have a very intense headache in the morning." _God, she looks so beautiful. _

"I know." The detective sighed as she fell back into the bed.

"Hangovers are actually the beginning stages of withdrawals." _Hide behind facts. No one needs to know how turned on you are._ "After so much consumption, your body _expects _more."

"I haven't been this drunk since..." Maura could hear Jane's even breaths as she thought. "I graduated from the Academy."

Some honey-blonde hair fell into the brunette's face when Maura leaned over to unbutton the detective's slacks. "All of my peers from college seemed to be very involved in binge drinking." There was a small pause full of thoughts from both of them. "Most of them didn't graduate."

"I can see why." It hurt to laugh but the detective did anyway. "If I didn't know any better, which by the way, I do, I'd think you were trying to get into my panties, Dr. Isles."

Maura rolled her eyes. "I'd be a lot more subtle than this, Jane."

"Yeah, yeah." The detective made a face as she watched the Medical Examiner watch her. "Just get me some sweats."

"Sweats." Maura made a face. "My God, I would've thought by earning a lot more money, you'd at least dress decently."

Jane glared at her. "I do."

"Mhm," The doctor shook her head. She folded the used clothes and put them on the empty desk. "I'll be right back." Jane appeared to already be asleep, but she couldn't tell. She walked down the long hall, checking behind every door. _Just look for the room that's the messiest. _She found the room with the bed that looked like it'd been used. The blanket had been haphazardly opened. Maura smiled. _How Jane._ When she returned to the bedroom, the brunette blew some of her hair out her face.

_Still awake._ Maura smiled. "I got your _sweats._" She mocked disgust.

"You know what," Jane sat up. "If you're gonna make fun of me, you can go sleep on the porch." Her grin proved she was joking.

"Okay, okay." Maura surrendered. "No more making fun."

"Okay, then." Jane lied back down, satisfied. _Guess she _has _changed. _"How's your mom?"

Maura's hands froze, momentarily but then resumed their activity of trying to get the sweats on Jane. It's like dressing a sleeping child. She is of no help. "She's very well."

"Are you guys...close?" Jane knew she shouldn't asking but she did anyway. No matter what she did to check up on Maura – which she never did, at least no purposely – it would only be on paper. She would know how the Medical Examiner would be doing financially, professionally, and maybe even if she'd gotten married. But she wouldn't know how Maura would _really_ be doing.

"Yes." The honey-blonde smiled.

"Good." Jane nodded. "That's...that's good." It was odd how things had changed. Maura was close with Constance and even Angela. She could tell the two were close by their body language with one another. The two had talked comfortably for an hour and Jane tried her damned best not to watch. The brunette didn't know it when she'd started to fall asleep. She just knew she felt like she had sand in her eyes.

_Hope I'm falling asleep and not dying. _"Goodnight, Maura." She mumbled.

Her words were barely audible but Maura caught the gist of them. "Goodnight, Jane." She whispered. She watched the detective sleep for a moment before leaving the bedroom. Tonight didn't end at all like she'd thought it would. Before she knew that Jane would be attending the party, she thought her company would be short. She would show up just to be seen by Vince. Give him his present. Say hello to a few detectives she knew. Then leave. When she learned of Jane's attendance, she changed schedule. She would do just about the same thing, but say hello to Jane – maybe catch up with her, then leave.

But, she wasn't ungrateful with the turn of events. She wasn't unappreciative of how easy it was to slip back into habit with Jane. Maura couldn't stop the smile that claimed her lips. It would be gone in the morning when she realized where she was and who she was there with. But, for now, she was just genuinely really fucking happy.


	6. Up Our Asses

There wasn't light shining through the windows. In fact, it was still dark. _But, why do I feel so fucking tired? _There was a throb in her head. A pain that pulsed throughout her body. She couldn't stop from burping but it tasted of a cocktail of hard liquor.

"Oh, God." Jane groaned as she rolled over. _I remember...Korsak and Frost. Maura. I definitely remember Maura. There was drinking._ The pain in her head was proof enough of that if the alcohol flavored belches weren't. "Never again." She promised herself as she sat up. Her mouth was insanely dry. Ridiculously parched. The brunette futilely attempted to lick her lips. She heaved as she pulled herself from the bed. It was comfortable but something in her pulled her towards her own room.

The detective was in her kitchen now. She looked down at her lack of layers. She was only in her bra and sweats. "I probably called Eve to come get me." She shrugged. "This was all she could probably get me into." Jane was sore. For the life of her she could not remember if she somehow walked in front of a bus at Vince's party. She sighed, heavily.

"Mother fucking Christ." She grunted as she padded down the hallway. Her bedroom door was opened. She could see an arm poked from under the blanket and honey-blonde hair that coated her pillows. _The fuck? _The brunette licked her lips as she walked closer to the person occupying her bed. _Eve? No. This woman's hair is too light. _She would've assumed it'd been a woman she brought home but that wouldn't explain why she was in a _different_ room.

The woman rolled over, away from Jane. She groaned something that sounded familiarly kinky. The brunette grinned. _Whoever she is, she's having sex dreams in my bed. I fucked her so good she's _dreaming _about it. _The detective made a face then turned, going to the other side of the bed. _No way this broad is kicking me out of my own bed. I don't care if she was _Maura Isles_. _The brunette climbed into the bed, away from the woman. No need to face myself with what I've done. Let's leave her faceless for now. When Jane settled, the woman automatically pulled the detective in. Jane only closed her eyes and let her sleep take over her again. Normally, she handled the big spoon duties. But, it reminded her of how much she wanted to be held by Maura. _Might as well pretend, right? _

* * *

Maura awoke around seven. Jane, bless her heart, was still passed out. Somehow the detective had found a way into her own bed. Maura however seemed a bit indifferent by the position she'd woken up in. Somehow, Jane had claimed her in her sleep. The detective had an arm snaked around the Medical Examiner's waist. She looked at her watch. She had an hour to get to work. She was just going to be late and she knew it.

Before falling asleep, she'd changed into something more comfortable. The only comfortable thing of Jane's that she could find were fleece pants (_or pyjammy pants as Jane would put it_) and a cotton shirt that fit Maura a little too well. She pulled herself out of the bed, carefully. She didn't want to wake Jane. The detective was going to need all the sleep she could muster.

"I'm here right, now." The honey-blonde heard from the living area. It was a woman. She grabbed her dress, heels, and coat. Her feet padded to the living room. "Oh, hello."

"Hello." Maura looked up. She felt a headache building into the back of head.

"I'm sure you're very interested in Jane." The woman crossed from the kitchen. "And I'm sure she's very interested in you as well. If you leave your number and name, I will make sure she calls you." _Is she kicking me out? _

Maura smiled. "You must be Eve."

"I am." The woman seemed surprised but not stunned. "Jane's assistant. And in case you're wondering, she wasn't lying last night. She really _is _a private investigator."

The honey-blonde shook her head. "I'm Maura." She bit her lip. "Isles."

Now Eve was stunned. "Oh." She stopped right she was and looked down at her feet. "I'm so sorry."

"Why?"

"It's just..." The woman looked as if she actually feared Maura. "You're Maura. She's Jane."

"We've established identities, yes." _All of my best jokes nowadays and Jane's not even awake to witness them. _"But, you're right. I should get going. She needs to sleep a little longer. Make sure her day starts a little later than usual, will you?"

"Got it." The woman noted as if she'd been taking doctors orders. _Suppose she is, in a way. Although mine are no good to the living. _

"Give her my number." Maura looked around. She found a pen and paper then wrote her number down.

"Gotcha." Eve nodded. Maura was going to tell her not to fear her but her phone started ringing. She knew the ringtone. It was the same Jane had for Angela. Before, the Medical Examiner had thought of it as obnoxious. Now, it seemed to funnily _fit_ Angela.

"Angela." Was all Maura said.

"Well you don't sound like you got lucky." The older woman stated. Maura smiled and rolled her eyes. She pointed to the door gesture to the assistant that she was leaving and Eve nodded. "Where are you?"

"Uhm," She opened the door. _Should I lie? What will she think of it?_ "I'm...at an old friend's house."

"Did you pick up a lucky guy last night?" Angela guessed. When Maura didn't immediately respond, she only took that as a yes. "Was he good in bed? Please give me details. The man I went home with was a complete mistake. Remind me to stay away from Korsak's friends."

Maura laughed as she pulled out of Jane's very long driveway. "Nothing sexual happened." _Now you decide to stick with the truth. _

"Well that's just a waste." The older woman frowned. "What _did_ you get out of it?"

"A chance to relive a time I was most happy." The automatic gate opened for the honey-blonde and she smiled at the memory of Jane's passcode. "Where are _you_, exactly?"

"Don't laugh." Angela's voice was small.

"Okay." _Not a promise. _

"...Stan...ley." The older woman's voice was sad. Embarrassed.

But, Maura couldn't help but burst with laughter. "OCDley?"

"Don't call him that!" Angela tried to hold back her own laughter.

"_You_ created the name!" Maura chuckled. "That is just...too perfect. No more trying to play match maker for me, Angela. Please? _You _went home with_ Stanley._"

"Fine, fine." The older woman agreed. "Due to my insane mistake, you have earned a week of control of your own love life."

"Only a week?" The Medical Examiner checked herself in the rear view mirror._ Looks like I've only gotten three hours of sleep. _

"Don't push it." Angela warned.

"I'll see you at headquarters, Angela." The doctor shook her head at her friend.

"Okay," Mrs. Rizzoli frowned.

Maura smiled. "OCDley." She couldn't help but giggle. It wasn't the scowl she could feel from over the phone. It wasn't the frustrated sigh from Angela. It was that the older woman_ hung up _on her that made her laugh even harder. _I can see where Jane gets it from._ She wasn't sure if it was truly that funny to her or just her emotions toying with her. Whatever it was, she was glad to laugh.

* * *

Noon. It had to have been. Jane hoped it was it was noon. Because if it were any later, she would have felt like a complete waste to humanity. The detective opened her eyes, slowly. The blinds were drawn shut. The light that did sneak through didn't disturb her or threaten her pounding head. She patted the side of the bed next to her.

_Empty. Eve must have been here. _

Jane smiled but then frowned quickly. It hurts to move. _God, just kill me now. I've lived a full enough life, right? Yeah. I think so. I'm ready._ She could hear sounds from the living room. Whatever it was, she only hoped it didn't get any louder. The brunette pulled on an old shirt then walked out of her bedroom, slowly. The closer she got to the noise the easier it became to recognize it.

_The Young and the Restless. _

Jane shook her head. "Oh, you're awake." The assistant smiled from the couch. "Good. I was starting to think you fell into a coma."

Jane flashed a mocked smile. "What time is it?" Her watch had been taken off. _Hope that broad didn't rob me._ "Feels a little late."

"Around one." Eve paused the TV. "I take it you had a lot to drink last night."

"Yeah," Jane grumbled. She rubbed her head as she turned to go to the kitchen. She was suddenly so hungry and thirsty. "I see you made no effort to cook me food."

"Sorry." _No you're not._ "I didn't know when you would wake up. Normally, as soon as I start to cook and you start to smell it, you're awake. I was under strict orders to let you sleep in."

_Who's orders?_ "Did you get rid of my _friend _from last night?"

"No." Eve abandoned the couch to join her boss in the kitchen. "She actually let herself out."

"My type of woman." Jane smiled. "No marriage proposal or anything."

"She left her number." The other brunette bit her lip.

"I take that back." The brunette pulled out a bottle of water. "_Clingy as fuck._"

"Her clingy?" Eve wasn't on the clock, she figured she could be honest without fearing her the loss of her job. "Jane, you named your _car _after her."

Jane spat her water out. "What?" _No, my car is named Infiniti **M**aura. I'd had it engraved on the back of it when I had it made for me._ "Maura was here? No. She wasn't."

"She claimed she was Maura." Eve shrugged. "She looked like her. Even though she wore your clothes, she looked a little high maintenance."

"Couldn't be." Jane crossed the kitchen into the dining room. She dug into a file cabinet and pulled out a thick folder. She shuffled some papers then pulled out a photo. "She look like this?" She held the photo up. Eve crossed the kitchen behind her boss then studied the picture.

"That's her."

"Oh, God." The detective groaned._ I've been calling her a broad this entire time._ "Did she say anything? Nothing happened, right? I didn't try anything with her, did I?"

"She just told me to make sure you got some sleep." The assistant studied her boss. "But, she didn't mention anything happening. Someone called her then she left."

_That's why I was sleeping in another room. God, and I just climbed into the bed with her like a big selfish jackass. You jackass, Jane. You unbelievably dumb jackass._ "Where's her number?"

"Over there." Eve pointed to the desk. "What's the big deal? You two had a sleep over. You said you used to do those all the time."

"The big deal is," Jane paused for a moment as she walked over to the desk. She wasn't physically capable of handling three things at once right now due to her hangover. Talking, walking, and freaking the fuck out. "We haven't seen each other in _five years_. And it wasn't like it was a mutual agreement or that we even ended on good terms. That would've been better. No, I had to go _shoot and kill _her biological father. The only goddamn link to her biological mother, whom I am assume is still MIA."

"She didn't seem upset." The other woman frowned. "I mean, she didn't seem upset with you. It wasn't like she fled or anything. Someone called her and she just excused herself."

"Maura's just polite like that." Jane ran her fingers through her hair. "On the inside she could be cussing you out in fifteen different languages, but on the outside she's as polite as the King's daughters."

"If she was here, I'm sure she forgave you." Eve tried. "You were really drunk so she drove you home. That means she still cares."

Highly unlikely. "Why are you here?" She finally asked, changing the subject. "What happened to your weekend with Tony? That's why I gave you yesterday off."

"You're always the first one into work." The smaller woman shrugged. "I stopped by this morning to get a file for him, but I didn't see you in your office. You're always the first person there, no matter how early it is."

"So you came here." Jane summed. "To check up on me."

Eve nodded. "Yeah." She looked at the photo Jane still had in her hand. "I know I'm off the clock today but I had to see if you were okay."

"I'm a big girl, Eve." Jane carefully put the photo down as if it were a bomb.

"I know, I know." The assistant went back to the kitchen to cook for her boss. Proving just how much of a 'big girl' she was. "You can take care of yourself."

"I can." The detective agreed. "But thank you." The brunette tried to smile.

Eve only let out a small laugh. "You should take a shower. You look like shit."

"Thanks," Jane said, sarcastically. "I'm so glad I hired you."

"Yeah, yeah." The other woman turned. "Just go make yourself look like you're at least_ living_." Jane didn't argue. She felt like shit and she felt dead, too. She was just so tired. It hurt to move. It hurt to breathe. It hurt to just live.

Maura was elbow deep into chest cavity. Starting the work day this way was actually how she got her energy. She loved her coffee but there was nothing quite like performing an autopsy at the start of the day. Unfortunately, when she didn't have very many answers from this autopsy and it made her feel like a failure. Kidneys seemed normal. Heart seemed normal. Every major organ seemed normal. But, that didn't explain this man's suspicious death.

"Jerry," She called over her shoulder. The assistant bolted – as if his life depended on it, which it sort of did – from the lab.

"Yes?" He stood near the door. "Ma'am. Yes, ma'am?"

_He's nervous._ "Could you run a tox screen on this man?"

"Yes." He nodded, frantically.

"Thank you." She smiled. He fled the room before she could give him any blood. The honey-blonde shook her head. "It's not like I'm a nine legged monster here to destroy his career." She said to herself.

"Might as well be." Barry said from the door. Maura's head snapped up then her eyes fixed on the dark man. _It's just Frost._ "Everyone's afraid of the Big Bad Dr. Isles."

"Big Bad Dr. Isles?" She shifted her weight. "I was under the impression they referred to me as Queen of the Dead."

"Nobody's called you that since..." He trailed off. _Since Jane killed my father._ "Anyways, I'm definitely dying here, Doc." The man patted his forehead with his tie. "Kel says it's just my hangover but I think I'm sick."

"Come here." She stood up straight. Barry hesitated for a moment but then walked over, avoiding the corpse on the table. "Still uncomfortable with the sight of a corpse?"

"I'm not exactly crazy because I can't stomach it." He defended. "I mean, I'm not saying anyone who can_ is_ crazy."

"Take your foot out of your mouth, detective." Maura smiled. "It's getting hard to understand you." Barry mocked her. Maura felt his forehead then his neck. "You're sweating excessively."

"Yeah." He frowned.

"Are you feeling nauseous?" She pressed the palm of her hand against his chest then lightly grabbed his arm.

"Yes." He nodded. "I'm so hot, and so cold." He winced at the pain from her arm.

"I think you go home detective." She pulled her hand back. He gave her a distressed look. "You're not _dying_."

"Alright good, because I don't have my Will all worked out just yet." He stared straight at the wall.

"I hope you at least have an Advanced Directive." She sighed as she went back to working on the body, beginning the closing.

"My wife." He smiled. "So, what's the diagnosis."

"Flu." Maura glanced at him. "But, stay away from your wife." He didn't seem surprised of the diagnosis.

"That's like telling me not to breathe, Doc." He frowned.

"How are the two similar?" It was really amazing how she didn't have to even look at the body when she closed it.

Barry laughed. "Nevermind, Doc. It's nothing." He walked around the morgue now. "Anyways, I hear you took Jane home."

_Ah, the primary reason for his visit. _"I did."

"Good." He nodded as he inspected some gloves. "You saved her and her car from hugging a tree." Maura winced. "Where does she live now?"

"I don't think it's my place to forward that information, Barry." Her tone wasn't apologetic. It was matter-of-factually.

"Guess you're right." He looked back at her. All he could see was her back. "It's just, I can tell she's so secretive. But, she's already open with you. I was her partner."

_And what was I?_ "I can understand your frustration." She really could. "But, just give her time."

"Give her time." He repeated. "Guess five years wasn't enough."

Maura whipped around to look at the detective. "This is about my taking Jane home is it?" She wasn't good with perception of underlying meanings but she was getting the gist of what this was about. "You're upset that _I _drove her away and the moment she returns, she's more interested in _me_ than _you_."

Barry winced. "When you put it like that...it sounds..."

"When I put it like that it sounds like the truth." She turned back to the body. "If you hadn't consumed so much alcohol, you could have taken her home, yourself."

"But I did." He stated, flatly.

"You did." Maura shook her head, disapprovingly. "I was one of the few people that didn't drink at all. She offered for you to join us but you declined out of fear of things becoming _weird_."

"It's just I know what it's like between you two." He ignored the body between them. "When you two are together, no one else really matters." _So, it's not just me that noticed?_ "I miss my partner, Doc. I didn't mean for it to seem like you drove her away. You didn't. What happened was just a misunderstanding and a big mistake. But, she ran from you. And the moment she returns, she's _all over you_ like she used to be."

"I'm sorry, detective." Maura didn't raise her eyes this time. "All I did was drive her home."

"Yeah but it won't be long before she's calling you to have lunch." His voice had a bit of resentment to it. Resentment he didn't even bother to try to hide. Maura could match that, easily. "Then she'll be asking you your opinion on her cases. Then next thing I know, you two are going to be the best of friends while I'm still trying to have a damn phone call with her."

"Would you like me to stay away?" Maura snapped. "Is that what this is about? You want Jane all to yourself?"

"No!" He stepped back. "She needs you. I wouldn't take that away from her even if I wanted to. But _I_ should be closer with her! She was my partner!"

"I could hardly tell!" Maura mockingly laughed. "You were so busy throwing up over vitreous eye fluid; she had to turn to _me_ for help!"

"I'm sorry," He bit out. "I'm sorry that I'm not some freak who gets their kicks out of dead bodies. I'm sorry I'm not like Charles Hoyt and I don't like to fondle stiffs. I'm sorry I'm not the _Queen of the Dead._"

"I think you should leave, detective." She warned. He needed no further instruction, the dark detective spun on the heel of his feet then left as quickly as possible.

* * *

**Author's Nose: Let me state that I did _not_ want to make Frost an asshole. If I were straight and into people of my own race (which is black) I probably would be in love with his character. Plus I loved The Famous Jett Jacskon. So, yeah. But, I had to make him an asshole this _one_ time just for the chapters up to come. Please don't hate me or him for being an asshole this one time. Plus, who doesn't like a little drama? I think Frost _should_ be a little pissed how easy it is for Maura to break down Jane's walls. In the show and in fics. He doesn't like the Jane doesn't talk about Hoyt with him but she would talk about it with Maura. So yeah...LOVE YOU ALL. Now review or I won't write. I've been neglecting my chores for all of you, anyway. I'm sure my mom would love a clean house. **


	7. Look, I'm Gay

**Author's Nose: Thank you all for your support. I am in awe of every single one of you. Reviews are amazing and I can't stress how much motivation they give me. **

* * *

The building was empty. Jane knew it because she gave everyone Sunday's off. Even if it meant she had to go in and do all of their work, she always gave them Sundays off. This seemed like the safest place to stay away from humanity and distract herself.

_You're hiding because you're a pussy, Jane. _

She needed some time away from home. Because, the more she stayed at home, the more she wanted to talk to Maura. She didn't want to seem desperate or even push things. What if Maura didn't want anything to do with her? What if Maura only drove her home then stayed because it was late. Not because she'd forgiven her but because she simply didn't want Jane to end up in a bad situation.

_Then again, she could've just thrown me into a cab._ The shrill of her personal cell phone interrupted her thoughts. She wasn't sure if she was relieved because of the call or pissed off.

"Rizzoli." She stated without checking.

"Janie," Frankie said from the other end.

"Hey, Frankie." She leaned back in her chair. "How are you feeling?" _I hope it's only as bad as me. Wow, I'm a great sister. _

"Think I might die." He laughed. "Ma keeps going on about the Hangover Flu going around."

"Hangover Flue?" She opened the file on her desk. _Another case. _

"Yeah," The younger Rizzoli shuffled on the other end. "Says she's been giving out soup all day."

"I could use some soup." Jane frowned. "I still have to pick up my car from the Robber."

"That's _your _whip out there?" Frankie choked. "I thought the guys were just fuckin' with me. They say it has Maura's name on it."

_Shit. _"Yeah," She sighed. "Yeah, Frankie. It's my car."

"Why'd name your car after the Doc?" _Goddamnit Frankie, you're so damn clueless. _

"Hey, Frank." She cleared her throat. "Maybe we should have dinner tonight."

"Tonight?" Frankie looked at his watch. "Alright, dinner in about two hours?"

"Sounds good." Jane nodded.

"And you'll tell me why Maura's name is engraved on your car?"

"Yeah." _Kid's a terrible detective. _"I'll tell you."

"Alright." His curiosity was evident. "Listen, I gotta go. Frost just found a lead in the case."

"Good luck." She meant it. If he couldn't figure out why Maura's name was on her car then luck seemed to be the only explanation for why he and Barry solved any cases.

"Thanks." He paused. Jane was about to hang up. "Wait, Janie."

"Yeah?" She pulled the phone back to her ear.

"I love you."

_Aw, how gay of you Frankie. _"I love you, too."

"Bye." He quickly hung up, suddenly embarrassed. Jane just laughed and put her phone back into her pocket. She read through the case file on her desk without actually comprehending it. Sundays were the hardest days of all. It was just her in the building alone. Though her quarters were small, they seemed a lot bigger when she was there alone. The detective walked around the building with a coffee in her hands as she tried to distract herself from Maura.

"Call her." She told herself. "Don't call her." She sighed heavily. "Why don't you stop being such a big bitch and just fucking call her already? What's the worst that'll happen?" _She could laugh right in your face then hang up. _"Well...I guess there's that."

"Talking to yourself, boss?" Paul asked from the front desk.

Jane whirled around. "All the best investigators do." She smiled. She realized she'd had her hand on her hip, where her gun would've been five years ago. "You know better than to sneak up on me, Paul."

"I didn't sneak up on you." He defended. "I thought you would've heard the door close."

She shook her head. "I didn't." She frowned, letting her hand fall to her side. "What are you doing here?"

"Heard we got a case." He looked down at Eve's desk. Normally, it contained a folder for all of the members on her team. "I thought for sure we were called in. My phone's been off all day."

"Sunday is still your day off. New case or not." She assured.

"Who are you afraid of calling?" Paul slung his backpack back over his shoulders.

"Huh?" _Play dumb. _

"It seemed like you were arguing with yourself over calling her." Worry stained his face. _He looks up to me. Why the fuck does everyone look up to me? Especially guys? I'm like McGyver in their eyes. _

"Oh, it's no one." She lied. She didn't confide in him because she was afraid he would have a problem with her sexuality. In fact, everyone she hired had to be okay with her sexuality. She made sure she mentioned it during the hiring process. She didn't confide in him because she knew he looked up to her. Most of her employees did. She didn't want that kind of weight on her shoulders, but if it was going to be there anyways, there was no way she could be close with them. Because when she disappointed them, it would break her heart to watch them witness their hero fall down.

"It is the puke lady?" He smiled.

"The what?" Jane looked at him.

"The picture on your desk." He pointed to her office. "The picture of you and woman. You have puke on your spandex suit." _Oh, P.U.K.E. _

She chuckled. "Yeah, it's her." _Might as well be honest now. The gig's up. _

"She's beautiful." He seemed unsure if he meant to say the words.

Jane smiled. "I know." She took a deep breath.

"I don't know what the situation is," He looked at his boss. "But, if she's in a picture frame on your desk and she's _still _that beautiful, I think you should call her."

The detective pursed her lips. "What if she weighs eight hundred pounds and has a pizza face?"

"You still love her, right?" He challenged. Jane laughed and nodded. "Then call her." He pointed to the office phone.

"Maybe I should play hard to get." Jane thought aloud. "I mean, she stayed the night. Nothing happened but I don't know. Maybe I shouldn't call her today. You never call the next day."

"Boss," He shook his head. "I respect you but that's gotta be the stupidest shit ever. You love her. Call her."

The detective was going to insult him right back but bit her tongue. "Alright, alright. I'll call her."

"Gotta promise, boss." He smiled. "If you call her – and trust me I'll know if you don't, then I'll work free over time for two weeks." _Shit, he got me. _

Jane appeared to be in thought even though they both knew he'd won. "Okay." She agreed. "I promise I'll call her."

"Okay." He grinned. "If we're not working, then I'm going to go to dinner with my family."

"Still close with them?" She crossed the opening between them to Eve's desk.

"Yeah." He nodded.

"I used to be close with my family." The detective admitted, sadly. "Then I fucked up."

"That's the thing with family," Paul smiled, suddenly. "Even when you fuck up, they're there to forgive them. You just gotta show them how badly you need their forgiveness."

"Three nights ago I didn't even think that I needed their forgiveness." Jane frowned. "Get home to your family, Pauly. Get to them while you can."

"Thank you." He smiled. "Call her." He glared. Jane nodded and the young man's face softened. Jane watched him leave. She was a little sad to see him go. Maybe it was because she was alone again. Maybe it was because he reminded her of Tommy and she missed her brother. She knew her brother worked as a mechanic, now. He was a good one too. She'd found his company on Yelp, but most of the customers preferred him.

Jane dug in her pocket for the small piece of paper that contained Maura's number. It was crumpled from her folding it then unfolding it, constantly. She'd bawled it up a few times and threw it in the trash, just to retrieve it and open it.

Four rings before the Medical Examiner answered. Jane had just given up hope. "Isles."

"Hello, Dr. Isles." The Detective bit her lip. As far as she remembered, she hadn't talked to Maura in five years. _God damn alcohol. _"It's Jane." She cleared her throat. "Rizzoli."

"Hello, Jane." Maura's smile was unmistakable. "How are you feeling?"

_She sounds busy._ "Awful." Jane took the seat at Eve's desk. "Can't remember much, though."

"I wouldn't have assumed otherwise." _Yep, she's definitely smiling. _

"Yeah," The Detective nodded. "How are _you_ feeling?" _I'm not talking about the alcohol, Maur. I hope you've changed enough to get that. _

"I'm fine, Jane." _Please fucking elaborate._ "I've had better days." _And worse. _

"What's so bad about today?" Jane elevated her feet to her assistant's desk. Even though Jane had been her boss, Eve had zero tolerance for feet on her desk. "What, someone try to test the gravity theory and you were the only ME available?"

"I don't think _jumpers _are testing the theory of gravity, Jane." Maura laughed, lightly.

"Bet most of them regret jumping as soon as they do it." The detective shook her head.

The Medical Examiner sighed, but it didn't seem like it'd been focused at Jane. "Most likely."

"You busy?" Jane swallowed hard. "Cause it sounds like you're fucking _Freddie and Jason _over there."

The brunette could see the honey-blonde grimace in her head. "I...wish I could make sense of that sentence."

"Don't bother," The detective smiled. "I just wanted to say thanks. For taking me home and making sure I was okay."

"You would do the same for me." _Damn right I would. No questions asked._ "But, you're welcome."

Jane felt a throb in her head. "Got any special tricks for getting rid of a hangover quickly that only smart people would know?"

"I've gotten that question a lot today." Maura breathed a laugh. "Accompanied with questions about symptoms of the flu."

"Yeah, I heard about that." The brunette pulled her feet back to the floor. "Frankie says Ma has been making soup all day."

"It's very interesting," The honey-blonde shuffled. "Crime fighters who can't fight infection."

Jane bit her lip. _She's trying to be funny. Don't be an asshole._ Jane coughed the closest she could to a laugh. "That's funny."

"You didn't really think so, did you?" _Damn it. When did you become better at reading people? _

"Sorry." It was an admission more than an apology.

"Jerk." The Medical Examiner's smile was evident so Jane didn't take the insult seriously.

There was a voice in the background that sounded like a man. Jane glowered. "Who's that?" _Might be Freddie or Jason. _

"That is," Maura paused. "Detective Frost."

"Detective Frost?" Jane smiled at the professionalism but once she realized there had been acid to Maura's words she frowned. "Why'd you say it like that?"

"He has been in here for the fifth time tonight." _More acid. _

"Why?" The brunette's brow furrowed in worry and curiosity.

"To apologize." The honey-blonde said as if it were nothing.

"For what?"_ Is it because he blindsided her with me? _

"Something he said." Again, Maura tried to dismiss it.

"What did he say?" Jane demanded, quietly. _As if I have any right to demand anything from her._

"Well, it was more of a point he raised." The words were simple but her tone was sad. As if whatever Barry had said to her was true and she didn't want to admit to it.

"What point did he raise?" _Stop beating around the damn bush. _

"You know, Jane." Maura's smile was forced. Even though the detective wasn't there to witness it. "I'm actually neglecting some of my work. I'll give you a call later."

Jane wanted to call her on her bullshit. _But I have no fucking place to do that anymore. I'm not her best friend. I'm not her partner. _"Okay." She frowned.

"Goodbye." Maura said quickly before hanging up. Jane didn't even get a chance to say anything else.

"Goodbye, Maura." She said into the dial tone. "Well, I tried." She pushed her phone back into her pocket. Jane looked down at her watch again. _Maybe I should go visit BPD. _Her only excuse – other than to twist Barry's balls until he told her what he said to Maura – to go to BPD or anywhere near it was to get her car.

Maura stood in front of the body on the table. There was a steel rod going through the man. His death seemed nothing more than accidental. He was a construction worker that fell fifty feet from the air. She'd been working on getting the rod out of the poor victim when Jane had called her. When the detective complained about the noise, she decided that it was the best time for a break.

Now, she was back into the morgue. Staring at the poor man. According to his file, he'd had two young kids at home.

"Doc." Barry said from the threshold of the door. He'd been rooted there for the last fifteen minutes. Trying to get her attention whenever he could. She actively ignored him and she didn't care if it was blatantly obvious. Even when she'd been talking in her bluetooth to Jane about him. "Why didn't you tell her what I said?"

Once again, she ignored him. She put herself back into her work.

"Dr. _Isles._" He pressed. "Why didn't you tell her?"

"_Because,_" She didn't look up. "What good will it do?"

"I'm an asshole." He frowned. "She'll kick my ass all the way back to my ma's womb." Bewildered by his response, she just shook the conversation off as she turned on the small saw. Maura didn't tell Jane because she knew how much the brunette meant to Barry. She didn't want to become to the old partners. She also didn't tell Jane because she knew Barry was right. She'd let herself get too close with the detective again. This was a woman who walked away from her when hated but _needed_ her the most. She would've forgiven Jane a lot sooner if the detective had been around. But she hadn't been. This was a woman who killed her father. A woman who was off sleeping with a man she couldn't even address by his first name – let alone remember it, instead of comfort the Medical Examiner when her mother was in the hospital.

This was because Maura had been so in love with Jane. Knowing that the detective didn't even know her own sexuality back then, she never pursued it. Because their friendship meant more to her. Five years later, Maura was willing to drop anything and everything for Jane.

Barry had been talking to her, but she ignored him. She didn't want to get into another argument with the detective. He seemed persistent. Nevermind the body on the table with a long steel rod piercing the abdomen.

"There you are," Frankie sighed. "I've been looking for you."

"Sorry," Barry frowned. "I've been down here with the Doc."

"If I didn't know any better, I'd think you and the Doc had something going on." The younger Rizzoli joked but Barry gave him a rare look. One that told him now wasn't the time to be implying adultery. "Okay, sorry." Frankie cocked an eyebrow. "Jane's upstairs."

Maura had been doing her best to ignore the conversation going on about her in front of her. But, as soon as Frankie said his sister was there, the Medical Examiner snapped her head up from the body. "She's here." It was a statement. Simple on the outside but her uproarious thoughts gave it meaning.

"Yeah." Frankie looked at the Medical Examiner. "Says she needed to get her car. We're gonna have dinner in a bit."

"So...she's not here to see me?" Barry looked panicked.

"No, but you can go up and say hi." The younger Rizzoli looked back to his partner. "It'll be hard. She's causing traffic up there."

"No, I think I'll stay down here." He looked nauseous. _Now is the time you feel sick, detective?_ "If that's okay with you?" He looked to Maura.

_Absolutely not. _"Sure." The honey-blonde forced. She reinforced her attention back to the body.

"Hey, Barry Snow White Frost!" Jane called from the elevators. "C'mere." She used her index finger to summon the dark man. He swallowed hard and threw a look to Maura for help, the Medical Examiner pretended to be masterfully fascinated by something on her glove.

"Yeah?" Barry tried to smile.

Jane just glared. "What'd you say to her?" The dark man should've known better than to treat Maura with anything other than respect. He'd seen the consequences when anyone belittled the Medical Examiner.

"I just..." He rubbed the back of his head. "Look, Jane. It's nothing, really. I mean I called her Queen of the Dead." The brunette scowled. "Look, I know it sounds bad. I was an asshole. I admit that. But, I apologized a million times to her!"

"You shouldn't have insulted her!" The investigator stepped forward to her old friend. "Why? Why'd you call her that? Because I can't think of any good reason you'd want ruin a good friend." _By dying. _

"Because." Barry's voice was forcefully low. The techs had been staring at them.

_I don't have a job to lose._ "Because of _what?_"

"You would never talk to me about Hoyt." He spat out. "Each time he went after you, you never talked to me about it. Always Maura. _Always._"

"She was my best friend!" _And probably more. _

"I was your partner!" He pulled her into an empty supply closet.

"I don't even want to know how you know of this place." She shook her head at her surroundings.

He ignored her. "You trusted me with your life. I trusted you with mine."

"Right." She agreed, not seeing his point.

"But you can't talk to me about things?"

"You're mad at _her_ because of_ me_?" She demanded. "I would never tell you anything about Hoyt or anything because it was_ my_ life. You never told me you were engaged to Anna. I had to find out from her. Talk about being blindsided." Barry opened his mouth to say something but came up short so he snapped it shut. "Yeah, I thought so."

"You left because of her." The dark man stated. "If it weren't for me, you wouldn't even be a hundred yards near BPD, let alone standing _in_ it."

"You're right about that." She agreed. "But, really man. You can't see what's going on here?" She kept her voice quiet. He shook his head. "If a serial killer took special interest in you. Wanted to do _things_ to you. Who would be the one person you tell if you didn't tell your friends and family?"

"Easy," The detective shrugged. "My wife." Jane stared at him until he clicked in his head. "Oh." He looked at her. "Oh!" _Coming out of the closet _in _a closet. _

"Yes." She nodded. "I was...in love with her." She whispered. "I told her because she was the only person I trusted enough with it. I didn't just not go to you, Snow White. I didn't do go to my Ma. I didn't go to my Pop. I didn't go to Frankie or Tommy. I didn't go to Korsak. I went to Maura."

"You went to Maura." He slumped his shoulders. "I didn't know, Jane. I mean I had my suspicions but I never thought they were true."

"Yeah," She frowned. "Turns out I _am_ a dyke, after all."

"It's not a bad thing." He looked at her. "Really. I don't care. I wish I'd known it before I insulted her. I feel like an ass, Jane."

She smiled. "You should. You're going to spend the next few weeks kissing her ass until she forgives you. Because if you ever say anything like that to her again, I don't care about the badge that protects you, I _will_ fuck you up. I don't give a fuck if I'm arrested. No one talks to Maura like that and gets away with it. You're lucky I like you. You got me?" He nodded. "Now, let's get out of this closet. I can smell the shit in your pants."

"I thought you'd kill me!" He defended, despite his clean pants. "Do you know how many times I watched you chew Crowe out whenever he even _looked_ at the Doc?" Jane knew. She was always ready to back-hand Detective Crowe.

The dinner was quiet. Not uncomfortably quiet but just quiet.

"I don't remember the last time we had dinner together." Frankie admitted as he opened his menu. They were at Alexander's Plaza. _You haven't been doing this job long enough if you don't know the menu by heart. _"Just me and you."

"I think we had McDonald's a few days before everything." Jane hid her smile with the hand cupped around her jaw.

"A _real _dinner." He glared at her for a moment but then turned his attention back to his menu. "Ma keeps trying to get me to settle down."

"She'll never stop until you do." Jane stirred the ice in her glass with her straw. "Why won't you?"

"_You n_ever did." He shrugged. "You were the best damn detective I knew of."

She smiled briefly. "You don't wanna end up like me, Frankie."

"What would be so horrible about that?" He put his menu back down. "You know why you were great? You never let anyone close enough. You kept everyone at the same distance."

"I quit, Frankie." She frowned. "Being a good detective isn't keeping everyone at a safe distance away from you. It's about keeping them close because I promise you, when you have one of those cases where you just need company you'll need all of the comfort you can get. I pushed my family and friends away. One thing they taught you in the Academy is to never quit. I didn't have anyone there for me because everyone assumed I wanted to be alone. So, I quit."

There was a silence. Jane looked around. They were alone. "So, you think I should just go out and buy a wife?"

Jane laughed, although his tone was anything but comical. "No." She smiled. "That's illegal, Frankie. Fuck is wrong with you."

He stared at her three seconds before smiling. "I haven't met anyone."

"You're not looking." She shifted. "You're using your job as an excuse not to look. I promise you Frankie, being married isn't the worst thing in the world. Even though Ma and Pop made it seem like it's easy to fuck up a marriage."

"Why haven't you gotten married, yet?" His eyes glanced to her car then back to her. "Is it..." He nodded to Jane's car. _Infiniti __**M**__aura._

She nodded. "Yeah." She took a deep breath. "I could lie to you and tell you I loved Maura so much as a friend, I wanted to have something to remind me of her. I could lie and tell you I thought it was clever. I could lie... but I won't. I'm comfortable with who I am, Frankie. If you're not, then that's on you. I stayed away for five years. Trust me, I can do it again."

Something that resembled pain flashed on his face before he composed himself. "I already knew, Janie. I just wanted to hear you say it. Ma knows it too. She talks about it all the time."

"What?" _The fuck. _

"Yeah," He chuckled. "When Maura came around. It became kind of obvious. She threw men in your face to see if you'd crack and just tell her."

"I didn't know it back then." Jane frowned. "I mean I did but I thought it wasn't real. At least, that's what I tried to tell myself."

"We always knew, Janie." He brought his glass of water to his lips. "Ever since you started softball. You never knew you checked out your teammates?"

"No." She shook her head, slowly.

"You checked Maura out a lot, too." He made a face."I mean I did it too but it's weird from you because if you were thinking the things I was thinking..."

"I got it, Frankie." She reached across the table and punched his arm. "So, you're cool with it?"

"Yup." Frankie grinned. "I don't care who you love, Janie. You're always going to be badass Rizzoli."

"Yeah." Jane agreed. _Always. _

"So...you're in love with Maura?" It wasn't really a question. More of a statement but he politely formed it into a question. "That's cool. I'm interested in how you're going to tell her."

"Oh, no." The investigator held her hands up. "I'm not telling her anything."

"What's this?" Frankie laughed. "Badass Rizzoli, scared of no punks is afraid of a socially awkward Medical Examiner?"

_Afraid of telling her how I feel. _"I'm not afraid." Jane lied.

"So, why have you been hiding it from everyone all these years?"

"Haven't been hiding it from everyone." The investigator sighed. "Not purposely, at least."

"Are you afraid she won't love you back?" _She doesn't love me back. _"Because once, the Doc gave Crowe and some officer a long ass speech about the Kinsey Scale. Or how homosexuality isn't wrong. She really defended them. Almost seemed like she was defending you."

"How do you mean?"

"I think she knows who you are, Janie." The brunette smiled at the way her brother phrased her sexuality. _He really doesn't mind, _and_ he understands it._ "So, when Crowe and that _dick _were going on and on about how weird gays are, she chewed them out. Just like you used to chew people out for her. She defended you. It was like she was protecting you even when you weren't there. And she was repaying you for all you did for her."

"She defended me?" Jane couldn't help her smile.

Frankie nodded. "Yeah," He looked at the waitress about to approach them. The young woman seemed to be debating on the right time to interrupt. "Which is why you should tell her. I don't see any reason not to."

"How about the fact that I killed her father," Jane offered. "And then ran away for five years."

"Okay, well there's that, I guess." He sighed. "Look, she loves you. You love her." The waitress waited next to the table now.

Jane looked up to her. "I'm sorry about my sister." She grinned. "She's been emotional, lately. Her period and all."

The young woman chuckled. "What can I get you guys?"

"Detective Special." Both Rizzoli's said. They smiled at each other then ducked their heads. They were still family.

"To drink?" The waitress noted their order.

"Coke for me." Frankie said.

"Same." Jane smiled.

"Coming right up." The young woman walked away without another word.

Jane turned to her brother. "Spoke to Pop?"

"Ha," Frankie made a face that looked like disgust. "He remarried."

"What?" The investigator glared, but Frankie knew it wasn't directed to him. "When?"

"Six months ago." The younger Rizzoli leaned his elbows onto the table. "Some bimbo closer to Josh's age."

Jane mirrored Frankie's earlier face of disgust. "The fuck. I thought he wanted to find himself?"

"Guess he found himself between the legs of a woman barely legal." Both detectives grimaced.

"Where is he now?"

"I'm not sure." The younger Rizzoli shrugged. "Not sure if I care, either."

Jane shook the thoughts of her father out of her head. "What about Tommy? Is he settled down?" _Hope he's not still swooning over Maura. _

"Nah," Frankie smiled. "He says he'll never stop playing the field."

_Sounds just like me. _"Is Ma still living with Maura?"

Frankie shook his head. "Nope."

They were running out of conversation. "I think I have to go to New Hampshire for a case this week."

"What's it about?" Jane knew better than to discuss of her cases but it didn't seem like it'd do any harm.

"Nine years ago, this kid went missing." She frowned. "His parents will never give up."

"Think you'll find him?"

Jane shrugged, sadly. "I wanted to turn the case away but all I could think of was Ma. If it were us, she'd never give up. Me turning them away would only make their lives harder. They need closure."

"They do." Frankie agreed. "But, this kid has been missing for nine years. What do you think you'll find?"

"The least I can do is find a body." The investigator leaned back as the waitress put their drinks down on the table. When she left, Jane moved her drink then leaned on the table again. "Anyways, I gotta go to New Hampshire to speak with the lead detective on the case."

"How often do you travel?" The detective asked as he stirred his drink. "I mean, is it worth it? Leaving BPD just to travel a bunch?"

"I choose my clients, Frankie." Jane looked at him. "It's worth it because I get to decide who deserves my help the most." Her brother nodded in understanding. "I don't travel that much, though. But, when I do. I tend to be gone for weeks at a time until I solve the case."

"How long do you think you'll be gone?"

Jane sucked air through her teeth as she thought. "Guess it just depends. I'll stay there for a bit until I get all the information I need."

"When will you leave?"

_21 questions, Frankie. Damn._ "Thursday."

"Maybe you could have dinner with Ma, Tommy, and I?" His voice was small, as if he feared of asking the question. As if Jane would choke him for even thinking of it.

"Maybe_. _We'll see." Frankie grinned. "Goddamn, pull your balls out." He glared at her and she only reciprocated with a grin of her own.

* * *

**Spoiler alert: Frankie and Angela are walking Jane into a trap. She thinks she's going to dinner with them but it's going to be just Maura there. Just like Angela did with Joey Grant. **

**Now review because I'm hot and tired and reviews make me happy. **


	8. Sad news

**So first my laptop broke in ways I don't know even understand possible. I have to wait for geeksquad to fix it and now my Internet if all fucked up. I have to use my iPad but that's really difficult due to fact that I can't upload anything to this website so I suppose I'm taking a short break. I don't want to but circumstance is twisting my arm. But while I'm here I'd love some reviews. It takes me two hours to write and you two minutes to review. So send me love and give me a reason to rush geeksquad on fixing my laptop. **

**also if you have read stories locked Up or cold wind by author Insomniac Jay, I am sad to report he passed away may 9th. We were really close and it would be great if you all could leave some love on one of his stories or something. He was an amazing writer and deserves something. **

**- Leasbian **


	9. Business is Business

**Author's Nose: I know a lot of you won't like this chapter because it's the business side of things. It is encouraged to read it but if you would like to skip it, I won't stop you. Cause...I can't. Haha. But, it's important. **

* * *

Business was slow for the day. Everyone was returning from their Sunday off and getting ready to begin another case. It was getting closer and closer to Christmas. Jane, for the life of her couldn't figure out what the hell she'd be doing this year. The last few years, she took vacations. She'd gone to France the second year without her family. South Africa the third year. Bejing the fourth year. But for the life of her, she had no idea what the hell she'd be doing this year. She knew she needed to begin working on a plan but she didn't know if she'd be available. This new case would be taking majority of her time.

Not that Jane minded being waist deep on a case on a very lonely Christmas.

"Alright, shall we get things started?" Eve asked as everyone assembled at their seats in the conference room. She received a wave of nods so she turned on the LCD Screen on the wall. "This is Benjamin and Amy Bennett. Nine years ago, they're son Avery went missing in the middle of the night on a Friday." She showed a photo of the family then their son. "The case was opened for about a year. Now it is dormant in the basement of the Concord Police Department headquarters. Detective Shamus Kane was the lead detective but is now retired. He has offered his full cooperation. Missing persons lieutenant has agreed to give us copies of the case."

"Did they have any leads?" Tony asked as he jotted down notes.

Eve took a deep breath then put the remote down near her seat. "Yes." She nodded. "Avery's baseball coach had been caught two weeks after his disappearance fondling one of his players." The team grimaced. "But, they didn't have anything to charge him with that related to Avery. They excluded all the teachers at his private school as suspects after investigating each and everyone of them. Both parents have been ruled out. The case is bone dry, guys." She threw a look to her boss.

"There's always something." Jane said. "We can't see it right now. We won't see it until we know all of the facts about the case.

"What do you need from me?" Paul asked.

"I need you to look into their lives, cyberly. Whatever seems odd, you report it to me or Kent." Kent Mavers had been her other investigator. He normally stayed in Boston whenever they left to go to another city. "Eve, I want you in Concord with us. You can talk to the parents. Try to get them to open up. But, for now. Since this family is fucking loaded and very popular there, I want you to keep the press off our asses."

"Got it." Eve nodded.

"Tony, I want you in Concord by tomorrow night. Find out all you can about their other leads, and follow up on them."

"Okay." He closed his notebook.

"Kent, I want you in charge for today. The rest of you will read more about this case." She stood. "No slacking. We have a job to do. I promised this family I would do the best I could. I'll be damned if I'm the only one." The team disassembled, scattering throughout the office as they began on the jobs they'd been assigned. Detective Mavers stayed near his boss' side.

"Taking the day off?" He asked, nonchalantly.

"No." She frowned. "I have court." She put on her blazer.

"Ah," He smiled. Jane liked Kent, but he was an arrogant asshole.

_There's only room for one of us._ "Don't sit at my desk again, today. I gave you a desk of your own."

"It's kind of hard to be boss when I'm in the bullpen with everyone else." He frowned. "They don't take me seriously."

"Then you come to me about it." They'd been walking into the lobby now. She glanced to Eve, who'd appeared to be on the phone already. She glanced into the bullpen where the other two investigators had been. Det. Lisa Holland and Det. Marie Miller. Two beautiful women who would've done a lot better at BPD. They would've been good for the police department. They were hard working detectives in the cities they'd originally been from and even now. But, Boston was male-dominated. They could've done a lot of good.

"I'm turning my phone off from ten to one." She announced. "Then again from five to ten." She received nods. "If anyone needs me, you call me on my personal. But, by God it better be a fucking emergency or I'm coming in tomorrow to kick asses then take statements." With that, she'd been out the door and already walking to her car.

* * *

The day started off late for Maura. First, she'd been just a minute late to work. A minute that meant almost everything to her. She'd made a habit to be an hour early to work everyday. The snow was heavy on the ground now. So heavy, she'd been forced to wear boots from her car to the building and from the building to her car. It didn't exactly match her outfit but it wasn't a complete eyesore.

"Maura." Angela rushed as she noticed the doctor entering the Boston Police Department. "You're late."

_Thank you for the reminder. _"Yes, I know." She used her fingers to rake the snowflakes from her hair. "The power on my street went out. I slept in late." _No need to tell her why you stayed up. _

"Ah," Angela had a mug in one hand and the coffee pot in the other. "Coffee?"

"No, thank you." _I really do need it but I've got to get going._ "I have court in fifteen."

Mrs. Rizzoli glanced at the clock on the wall above the threshold. "I think you should get going."

_I was doing that before you stopped me._ "I'll see you around noon?" Angela nodded.

Once in her office, the Medical Examiner grabbed her files then rushed back to her car. Once at the courthouse she was greeted by Angelo Alvisio. It was slightly awkward to see him after Angela had tried to talk her into going to dinner with him.

"Dr. Isles." He smiled. He looked as Italian as Italian looked. His hair was dark, and his eyebrows were bushed. His skin was naturally tanned. A tan people spent years trying to achieve. "Glad to see you again."

_I wish I could say the same. _"How are you, Mr. Alvisio?"

"I'm a lot better now that you're here." He smiled. "Now that you've proven my client is innocent."

"I am sorry for all that your client has suffered." Maura frowned. "Science proved him to be guilty."

"Until you saw the video of Jesse Lane killing the victim." Angelo finished. "I hope the Boston Police Department is good at apologies."

Maura glared at him. "Maybe we should get inside." She nodded to the awaiting court room.

"Maybe we should." He glared back. "You know," They began walking again. "Sometimes, you remind me of that detective. The gay one."

"Excuse me?" She stopped, immediately.

"Just..." He shrugged. "You two were close, right? You remind me of her sometimes." Maura tried her damn best to hide her smile.

"I would like to call the Chief Medical Examiner to the stand." Angelo said as he walked over to the jury. Maura frowned at her title but walked over to the stand. "Dr. Isles here is the Chief Medical Examiner. Some of you may remember her from the last hearing. Fancy. High maintenance. Refused to give assumptions or opinions but she was strict with what science had to say."

"Alvisio, get to the point." Judge Batter rolled his eyes. "I have other hearings."

"Right, right." Angelo pushed himself away from the jury then walked over to Maura. "Is it true you found blood the blood of the victim on Mr. Wright's clothing?"

"Yes." Maura nodded once.

"And Mr. Wright had been at the crime scene right next to the bleeding victim?"

"Yes." She nodded again.

"I don't know about you, Dr. Isles." He smiled and turned around. "But, if I were going to murder someone and I knew the police were coming to said person's rescue. I most likely wouldn't stick around to be charged with it just to plead innocent later on."

"That wouldn't be the smartest thing to do." Maura agreed. "Not the right thing but the smart thing."

"Now, if you don't remember the statement my client James Wright released to the Boston Police Department," He turned the jury. "It was that he'd been called over by the victim. They were going to discuss business. But, he'd found the victim drowning in a puddle of his own blood." A few of the jurors grimaced. "James Wright tried to save this man. Which was why officers found him at the crime scene next to the body, covered in blood that wasn't his own. It wasn't because he murdered Richard Warner. It was because he tried to save a friend."

"Is it possible, Dr. Isles. That science isn't the answer to everything?"

She sighed. "Yes."

"But, the Boston Police Department depends on you for forensic evidence, Dr. Isles. But, you're too busy basing all of it off of science."

"I believe in science." Maura stated. "It has not failed me. I never assumed Mr. Wright was the culprit. I only stated the blood found on his clothing belonged to Richard Warner. Detectives at the Boston Police Department assumed. I did suggest that Mr. Wright was too short and lacking muscle to manhandle a man the size of Richard Warner."

"But, it seems like you were just insulting him rather helping him."

"I wasn't helping him." Maura took a deep breath to control herself. "My job is to collect forensic information. A man the height and weight of James Wright would have monolithic difficulty handling a man the height and weight of Richard Warner."

"But, we found evidence that clearly shows James Wright is innocent."

"Which would make your premise more probable." She nodded. "That he was trying to save his friend."

Angelo nodded then turned back to the jury. "You are excused, Dr. Isles." She rolled her eyes but fled the stand as quickly as possible.


	10. Walking Into A Trap

It was cold. Not the type of cold that one could sleep through but the type of cold that reminded Maura just of how lonely she was. There wasn't a warm body next to her that she could cuddle closer to. There wasn't a lover who could feel her shiver beside them and wrap their deliberate arms around her. No. There was no one. She was used it. She'd spent forty years of her life alone, why should she be astounded now? She needed a partner. A lover. Someone she couldn't put a face to. The temptation vacillated her. Flustered her bones and shook her reasonless. She needed a one-night-stand. But those were forbidden now by her therapist. It irritated Maura than she was used to. Maura was sexually frustrated. So very sexually frustrated. No random, anonymous lovers were allowed in her bedroom. An agreement that she more than sorrowed now.

Maura Isles loved only three times in her life. The first two were all wrong. The feelings were grotesque. Garrett Fairfield was her first "love". But the only thing she loved about him was the family he belonged to. They meant something to Boston. Just as her family did. She thought she was supposed love him. And it helped that he was good to her. He treated her like he wanted to spend his life with her, which was more than she could say about Ian. He loved her. That much was obvious. But he never stuck around for more than five minutes to actually establish a functional relationship with her. The finally love, Jane Rizzoli. It scared her to think of how much she needed Jane. The bronzed detective killed her biological father. But, Maura was still willing to jump through hoops for her attention. For a moment with the brunette. She was still pining after her. Still dreaming of her and waking up alone, without her. Maura Isles was cold.

* * *

6:28 AM. The angry crimson letters claimed. The time wasn't the problem. Jane was for more used to being awake at this time of morning. What she'd been _doing_ with her time that was the problem. It was the fact she'd just woke up alone again for the fourth day straight since Vince's party. Nothing compared to waking up next to Maura Isles. Nothing compared to falling asleep next to Maura Isles. And it felt more than inexact to have another woman in her bed with her. Jane dropped the toothbrush into the holder as she stared at herself in the mirror of the bathroom. She didn't look like she'd aged much. Her face seemed to have frozen in time. The bags under her eyes were almost permanent. She never genuinely slept. She felt awake most of the night. Jane didn't smile much for the last five years. It was rare that she found anyone that could make her forget the ache and absence in her chest. Eve had been the only one that could help her manage. A true friend. The truest she'd had nowadays. Of course she had her other employees, but they were nice to her just because it'd been the humane thing to do. Their offers never meant much. They were all afraid of her. Just like at the Boston Police Department, everyone feared her. The only person that could take her abuse and still stand up to her had been Maura. Jane's face seemed to be frozen since the day she shot and killed Patrick Doyle. Since the day she'd lost Maura.

The shrill of her phone tore her from the long staring contest with herself. The tune blaring from the small phone gave away the caller. Jane didn't bother checking the caller ID.

"Rizzoli." She stated, her voice still husked from sleep.

"Janie," Angela's reply wasn't instant. "My God, you still answer the phone the same." Jane mumbled something about a lot changing about her but it'd gone by the older woman. "Frankie tells me you're still in New Hampshire."

"I'll be home today, Ma." Jane rolled her eyes at her mother._ Frankie likes to talk a lot of shit._

"I just don't want you backing out the last minute."

"We could always reschedule." Jane sighed. "It's not like I'm going running for the hills, Ma."

"Seems like you did that before." Angela shrugged on the other end. "You could leave again so easily."

Jane's heart sunk at the evident pain behind her mother's words. "I'm sorry, Ma." She sighed. "I didn't think...you...I didn't think you guys really cared that I was gone."

If Angela had been within a foot of her daughter, she would've smacked her upside the head. Because they were miles apart, a smack of her lips would have to suffice. "That's the stupidest thing you've ever said to me, Janie. Aside from the time you were seven and you woke me up in the middle of the night because you thought Susy De Corte was an alien because she talked in her sleep."

"It sounded like she was trying to communicate to another world," The detective laughed. "She talked so loud."

"Sure, sure." Jane's mother shook her head at her daughter. "You can be a sleeptalker when things are bothering you."

"So, I've heard."_ From every woman I've slept with in the last five years. _

"Are you an alien, Janie?" Angela whispered.

_Feels like it._ "Yes, Ma." The detective began packing her clothes as she talked to her mother. "Some aliens sent me on an assignment. I'm what's known as the Decider. I got to decide that the Earth didn't blow up in 2012. But, I'm not so sure about my choice now."

"You wouldn't let a hair on Maura's head be misplaced." The older woman excused. "I missed this, Janie. Your sarcasm."

"Thanks," Jane smiled. "I'm here every week."

Angela rolled her eyes. "I'm hanging up now."

"I'll see you when I get home, Ma." The brunette grinned.

"Eight. Carmen. Remember it."

"Got it." Jane looked down at her watch. She had a plane to catch in two hours. Getting to the airport was going to be a bitch considering it was three days away from Christmas. "I love you." She added quickly when she heard her mother move to hang up.

"I love you so much, Janie." Angela's smile was unmistakable and it made Jane grin.

* * *

Maura stared down at the body on her table. After court with Angelo two weeks ago, it felt like all the cases she'd consulted and worked on meant nothing. Her judgment was questioned. Her work ethic interrogated. She based every opinion off science because that was all she could count on. It was solid and it was all the proof she'd needed. When she'd worked with Jane, she'd grown almost a second opinion behind every case. Like the time the dock worker MJ had been killed. She knew that young woman was a fighter, she'd went undercover without any back-up to prove her father hadn't been drinking the day of his accident. She formed second opinions because of Jane but after what Jane did to Patrick, she couldn't help but detach herself of any feelings. Everything was strictly science.

But, now staring down at this body she couldn't help but feel that her work had been compromised. This man looked like Jane. Tall, bronze, and toned. He had fallen victim of a undercover drug bust gone wrong.

"Det. James Stevens," Maura said into the recorder. "Has three bullet wounds. The first two suggests the shooter shot him from a fifteen foot region. The final shot proposes the shooter stood above the victim. It is not certain but the theory can be tested." Maura took a deep breath before dropping the recorder into her coat pocket. She looked down at the body again. _I miss Jane. _She couldn't help the reminder that she'd almost lost Jane multiple times because of Charles Hoyt, Bobby Marino, and other culprit men.

It'd been two weeks since Maura had spoke to Jane. Barry and Frankie had told her the investigator had been working a case in Concord, New Hampshire. Maura tried to be diligent because it was likely the case had gone cold and was just reopened for Jane or the case was mostly her following around someone. Her patience was successful, despite the deep longing within her for the brunette. She wanted Jane. Her body knew it. Her mind knew it. Her heart knew it. It wasn't just sexually, although that seemed to be the world-class command. She needed to hear Jane's laugh, to see her smile. Just to see her. Five years felt like a century compared to the two weeks she'd gone without Jane. Every second of Maura's day was measured. She needed sex. Preferably, she needed sex with Jane.

"Doc," Barry startled her. "I knocked three times." Maura had been back in her office. Just staring off.

"I'm sorry." She wasn't. "Is there anything I can do for you?"

"You, uh," He took the seat on the other side of her desk. "Looked deep in thought."

"I was." _Nothing in profit if I lie._ "Is there anything I can do for you, detective?" She repeated. He was there to _kiss her ass _until he received a verbal indication that his incessant apologies were working.

"You know, Jane used to drift off like that." He grinned. "It scared the hell out of me at first. I thought she was just fuc-messing with me. But, then I figured out what she was doing. Work sucked. Dead bodies over dead bodies. She drifted off to a place that made her happy. I bet I know what that place was."

Maura looked through some paperwork to at least look like she hadn't been paying attention. "A baseball game is my supposition." She shrugged.

The dark detective laughed. "Probably, but I'm thinking of the person she was with." Maura's heart clenched. "A certain someone."

"Is there anything of value coming from this discussion?" The honey-blonde asked as calmly but firmly as she could. "Because I have work to do. With all the work I have, I am more than certain you do too. So, I suggest you get back to the job the city pays you for instead of uselessly attempting to get a verbal credence to your apology. What you said to me was unprofessional, it was ill-mannered, unfair, and it was egotistical and I will not support being spoken to in such a manner. I don't care that you are Jane's friend. She and I are nothing more than old friends at this juncture. I owe nothing to you and you owe nothing to me."

Barry's eyes stabbed at the emotional walls she had built up. He searched for a way in, to understand what she'd truly been feeling and why. "I'm sorry, Dr. Isles." Formality.

Maura nodded. "If there is anything work related that I can help you with, I am more than inclined to offer my expertise but if it just to discourse of Jane like we are in middle school, I would prefer you do that on your own time with someone else." Barry nodded, but left without another word. Maura sighed as she felt his presence leave. She knew her reaction was rather impolite. It was sudden but she couldn't hear of Jane being in love with someone else. She'd accepted the possibility after Agent Dean but it still hurt to think of it. _I miss Jane. _

* * *

"Janie," Vince smiled on his end of the phone.

"Korsak, you big, fatass fuck" Jane said with mocked enthusiasm. "How the hell are ya?"

The retiree laughed. "I'm good, Janie. I'm good, how are you?"

She smiled when Sadie Monday raised her head to look at her owner, only to lower it again. "Listen, I have some pictures from your birthday for you. Not going to lie, you're looking at me like you want to eat me. Melody must have you on a cleanse or something."

"You gonna bring 'em to me or do I have to use my juice to get into that gated community of yours?" Vince had never seemed to so happy. _Things with Melody must be working well this time around. _

"Nuh uh," She shook her head as she pulled her bag over her head then dropped it to the floor next to her suitcase. "I ain't letting your ass within a hundred yards of my place."

"Too late about that Janie." He laughed. "Been near that mansion almost a dozen times."

"It's hardly a mansion." The brunette was in her kitchen now. She was hungry and she'd learned to tolerate airplane food. Just as a child learned to tolerate school food. But it never really fulfilled her hunger. Jane had the metabolism of an Olympic swimmer. "Listen, I was thinking. Maybe we could have breakfast or something. Or lunch. Just no brunch. That shit's gay."

"Damn it," Vince mocked.. "I guess I'll have to tell Dr. Isles that she's gay."

Jane glared. "Maura's not gay." _This I know for a fact._ "Anyways, I'm serious. I figure, I've had time with everyone at BPD. Why not start fucking with the security staff of the Hilton."

"You miss me, Rizzoli." The older man's smile made her smile. "You can say it."

"I miss you," Jane sighed. "Fatass."

Vince laughed. "Fuck you, Rizzoli. Breakfast Friday morning at some fancy high priced cafe."

"Korsak, I don't think they have those." Jane looked down at the three sandwiches she'd made for herself. "But, I'll call you. I just realized I have a shit ton of debriefing to do."

"Angie tells me you that you have dinner tonight." That's a funny way of phrasing it. "Can't you do the debriefing tomorrow?"

"I can," The brunette walked around the island of her kitchen to retrieve a glass. "But I won't."

She could almost feel Vince roll his eyes. "I'll talk to you later, Rizzoli." The detectives hung up without another word. Jane stared down at her sandwiches again. She was going to be hungry again by eight. That wasn't the problem. She preferred to debrief her team immediately after every case. She could swing by the office then meet her family at Carmen on time. It was only six. _No. This is important to Ma. I need to give it my all or she'll fucking kill me. _

* * *

Maura looked at herself in the mirror. She knew better than to second guess her looks. She was beautiful. It was obvious. It wasn't the type of beauty that could only be seen from certain angle. It was the type of beauty that was apparent. Maura wasn't egotistical, she was just confident. Men and women were attracted to her. Angela had invited her to dinner last minute. The older women knew better than to give Maura time to say no. The honey-blonde found herself in these situations a lot, now. She sighed as she grabbed her purse and cell phone. The restaurant was popular in Boston. Maura had been to it many times on dates.

"Reservation, under Angela Rizzoli." She said to the host. He smiled at her. He recognized her. She didn't have the type of face or class that one could forget.

"I'll have someone here to seat you in just a moment." He told her. Maura only nodded but waited. The waitress came to bring her to the table assigned to them. It was a table for two. And empty.

"Is there anything I can start you off with?" The red-haired waitress asked with a smile. A smile that Maura understood. It was forced.

"Yes, I'd like Sauvignon Blanc." The Medical Examiner easily ignored the impatience of the waitress."The diverse incised cheeses."

"Yes, ma'am." The red-head forced another smile before walking away. Maura settled on adjusting the folding of her serviette in her lap.

"Maura?" Jane's voice sounded like a million angels walking on air. The honey-blonde couldn't help her eyes rolling to the back of her head. "What are you doing here?" _God, I hope she's not on a date. _


	11. Not Like You Have A Choice, Anyway

"This is the table you'll be seated at, Ms. Rizzoli." The red-haired waitress from before gestured to the seat opposite of Maura.

"This is has to be a mistake." Maura looked to the waitress. "I'm meeting _Angela_ Rizzoli here."

"No," Jane dropped into the seat. "I can't believe I fell for this again." The detective covered her face, mostly to hide her frustration. "She set us up."

"I'm sorry?" Maura could barely understand Jane's muffled words.

The investigator dropped her hands to her lap. "Ma. Angela. She set us up." She rolled her eyes. "She's not coming. It's just you and me."

"Why would she do that?" It was more a question of curiosity rather betrayal.

"Because she's Angela Rizzoli." Jane glared at the table before her. "She lives for this shit."

"Jane," Maura frowned.

"Sorry." Jane mumbled. "I'm sorry. You can leave if you want." _Please don't. _

"No," The Medical Examiner shook her head, her honey-blonde curls casked slightly. "We should talk, anyway."

_Oh, great. There goes my appetite._ "Must we?"

"We must." The honey-blonde smiled. "It's healthy to get over past grievances, Jane. It's important that we talk about it. I've forgiven you."

"You have?" The brunette glanced to her then back down to the table.

"It was easy." Maura admitted. "You were my..._best friend_." _Complete understatement._

"You were mine too." Jane smiled. _And so much more. _"I'm sorry, Maur. I'm so, so sorry for what I did. I wasn't thinking. Well, I was thinking but I wasn't thinking the way I wanted to. I was only thinking of protecting you. Anyone with a gun aimed at me or near me was the only way I could do that. I know it doesn't excuse what I did. It doesn't make it right. Nothing makes what I did right." _God, I hope she made sense of that. _

Maura thought for a moment. Mostly about what she should say next. This was the hard part for her. Explaining her feelings without giving off the impression that she didn't have any. "I felt betrayed. I saw you there with Agent Dean. He wasn't supposed to know, Jane. It was supposed to be us. Just us. It could have gone better. And, I've dreamt of different scenarios. Better scenarios. But, I'm left with the same one. The truth. I understand that you were only doing your job. I completely understand that. At first, I was blinded by feelings. But, I've rationalized the situation. Things could have gone better but if you had not been thinking like a police officer, things could have gone a lot worse."

"I'll never forgive myself." The truth of her words tugged at both of their hearts. Jane had never wanted to admit that to Maura. _Hell, I never thought I would have the chance to. _Maura's guilt ate at her daily and that only officiated there was something to feel censurable for.

"I have." Maura's hand covered Jane's. "You should, too."

The brunette halfheartedly smiled but it faded quickly. "When I left BPD, I left Boston. For two months, I left. I had a friend that owed me a favor. So, I went to his summer home in New Mexico. It was far away from civilization. I rarely went into town. If I did, it was for things I needed. But, while I was there, I had a lot of time to think. I couldn't understand why he meant something to you. Why you wanted him to live. I guess I never thought you listened to me. All the times I tried to tell you that he actually loved you, I never thought you were listening. I didn't think I was getting through to you."

"I listen to every single thing you say, Jane."_ Too much information, Maura. She does not need to know that._

Jane nodded then smiled. "I met this woman there. I had gone for a run in the town and there was a kid that had fallen from a tree. I was the first to help him. Thank God we were like three yards away from a clinic. Anna, the woman who ran the clinic, came running to help us. I wasn't sure if I should move the boy or not. And I kept asking myself what you would do. Or what you would want me to do in that situation. Then I realized, _I_ actually listened to _you_. I mean, I knew that. I listen to every thing you say, too. But, I mean I actually _listened_. The facts that I thought were pointless. I actually listened to them. Anyways, when Anna gave me instructions on how to help her with the little boy, I found myself a little annoyed because I'd already known what to do."

Maura smiled as she listened to Jane._ She is so beautiful. _

"I've told everyone else this. Apparently, there's no need to tell Ma because she already knows. Which is kind of strange because I'm starting to think you most likely know it too. A week after meeting Anna, I went to dinner with her."_ No need to tell her why I was attracted to her._ "I can't tell you why I felt like I needed to date this woman. I can't tell you because I don't know why. But, I felt like I had to be with her. We went on dates. We kissed. She came over to just listen to me. I went to the clinic just to be near her."

Maura had no trouble listening, but the swell in her chest. It popped like a balloon and pain oozed. Jane was confessing to dating a woman but it felt like she'd been confessing to cheating.

"I think I fell a little in love with her." _But not as much as I fell for you, Maura._ "She helped me explore my sexuality. We never had sex but that doesn't make a person gay or straight. It's the feelings. I guess, I'm trying to tell you that I've never had feelings for men. I thought I did. I mean, I liked Agent Dean for the challenge. I wanted to know if I could have him. To see if I could open up an FBI Agent. And I could. Same with every other man. I only liked Casey because I felt challenged to get him here. I wanted to see if I could do it. If he could be in love with something other than the service. I'm gay, Maura."

Maura's smile had been frozen. She didn't even know she'd been smiling until she frowned. "I knew of your sexuality, Jane. I could see the way you looked at other women. The way you looked at me."

"God, am I just a pig?"

"I'm afraid so." The honey-blonde's smile was crooked. It wasn't devout. "I am not judging you. It's who you are and I've never had any difficulty with it."

The brunette grinned. "Really?" Her smile faltered, slightly. "Even when I was looking you up and down like you were a piece of medium rare steak with potatoes?"

"Even then." Maura's mouth went dry. She glanced to the attire the detective wore. Nothing out of the ordinary. Slacks and a blue dress shirt. But she could see the brunette's chest. Flushed.

"I suppose," Jane cleared her throat. She'd caught Maura staring. "We should talk about Korsak's party."

"You were quite entertaining," The Medical Examiner bit her bottom lip. "Loquacious. Imbalanced. Blunt."

"Oh, God." Jane covered her eyes. "How bad was I?"

"Well, you also came out to me then." Maura smiled at the memory of Jane confessing her love. _Let's not go near that subject, tonight._ "You were very independent. But, I'm sure alcohol only increased that characteristic. You've always been self-reliant."

"I'm sorry." Jane frowned as she dropped her hand. "If I said anything dumb that night. I have a habit of-"

"Being honest." Maura finished for her. "You didn't offend me in any way. You have a beautiful home, Jane. And a great friend."

"Eve?"

"Yes." The Medical Examiner smiled. "You described her to be very loyal. She lived up to expectation the next morning when she tried to kick me out."

Jane laughed. "Yeah, I'm sorry about that too."

"She quickly retracted when I told her I was Maura." The honey-blonde licked her lips. "Is there any extraordinary reason for that?"

"I, uh, I might talk about you a lot." Jane mumbled. "You're my best friend, okay? Of course she knows about you."

Maura grinned. _You're my best friend. _ "You didn't use past tense."

"What?" She picked at the table cloth.

"You said," The honey-blonde shifted. "You're my best friend."

"Oh," Jane looked at her. "Sorry. If...that's a problem."

"No." Maura smiled. "It's not. I still consider you my closest friend. I just didn't think you reciprocated the feelings." There a lot of feelings I'm not sure you reciprocate. "It's not a problem."

"Good." Jane smiled, proudly. "Not like you had a choice, anyway."

"I'm afraid, we can't fall back into pattern so easily." The honey-blonde's smile wavered. "Things are different now. We are different people."

"We are." The brunette agreed. "But, I don't really see what's holding us back."

"I owe you an apology," The Medical Examiner bit her lip.

"For what?" Disbelief stained her question.

"Are you two ready to order?" The waitress asked, her smile barely ocular.

"Are you?" Jane asked Maura.

The honey-blonde nodded. "Yes," She looked to the waitress. "I'll have the Tagliatelle alla boscaiola." The waitress noted then turned to Jane.

"Uh," The detective was aware she had never once looked at the menu. She opened it and focused on the first word she could make out. "Rissota al gorgonzola."

"Fine choice, Jane." Maura complimented with a smile.

"Uh, thanks." Jane quickly handed the menus to the waitress. She dismissed her with the wave of a hand. "Anyways, what do you have to apologize for?" _Because I can't think of shit._ "Are you trying to tell me you drove to God knows where and shot my Pop?" _Cause, I don't think I'd have a problem with that now. _

"No." Maura glared, disapprovingly. "I would never."

"You can," The detective smiled. "If you want. Just let me know."

The Medical Examiner poked her friend's arm. "_No._" She repeated. "I shouldn't have let you leave so easily. I certainly don't regret it now. You seem so much happier with your line of work. But, I feel at blame for the distance between you and your family. They've missed you. It was my fault. What happened was between us – and although I never asked for them to choose sides but I never stopped them – should have stayed between us. I know the feeling of being alienated. I can imagine how you felt. Almost everyone was against you. That was never my intention but I didn't stop it. So, I am so sorry."

Jane looked at her. She could see Maura meant the apology. She could see that Maura truly felt at blame. And there was an undercurrent of emotion that blamed Maura. "I forgive you." She smiled.

"Good." The honey-blonde grinned. "Not like you had a choice, anyway."

* * *

**Author's Nose: Who's the best lesbian in the world? This girl is. Who's the best multiracial 5'10" lesbian named Lea? Still me :) Who's the best reader in the world? Those who review. Excel and review for me or I'll have to stick Angela Rizzoli's vibrator up your pooper. Oh God, that was horrid. I am sorry for threatening that...but I'll do it. I refuse to post another dang chapter until I reach 85 reviews. It's a personal victory and you are more than welcome to bitch at me for it ;)**


	12. Cheese Olives Wine Two women

**Author's Nose: I received twenty reviews yesterday. _Twenty_. I am so thankful. So, today, I am hoping to get the same amount. Yup, that's right. I want 107 reviews or no sex for you. And I don't mean sex from me. I mean...unless you're interested ;) but yeah there's sex in this chapter so...go be nasty and read.**

* * *

Dinner was quiet and they'd barely spoke to each other. They'd exchanged looks and smiles and it seemed to be enough. Now, dinner was over and Maura was tailgating behind Jane to the brunette's new home.

"How nice it is to be here when you're _not _under the influence." Maura said as she closed the door of her car.

"Yeah, well," Jane shrugged. "Don't get used to it."

"Wouldn't dream of it." The honey-blonde followed the brunette to the door.

"I'm gonna have ice cream." Jane announced as she opened the door. "You can share a big bowl with me or you can just watch me eat it."

"How gracious of you." Maura's sarcasm wasn't lost on Jane but she'd decided to let it go. _Strange. It feels like home._ Jo Friday and Sadie Monday greeted her as they circled her feet. Maura rid herself of her heels and knelt down to speak with her old and new friend.

Jane watched from the kitchen and smiled with her spoon in her mouth. She decided against the ice cream when wine and cheese sounded so much better. "How's Bass?"

"Bass is Bass." The Medical Examiner giggled when Jo and Sadie fought for attention. She tried to direct it to both of them. Rubbing both of their backs.

"So, he's still weird."

"He's not _weird_." Maura frowned. "That is just his personality."

"He's weird, Maur." Jane smiled. "Just like you."

Maura knew better than to take offense to that. "You know, studies show that some dogs adapt to their owner's personality. An owner who is depressed is likely to have a depressed dog. It's not absolute but it is likely."

"Remember when I said I listen to everything you say?" Jane pulled out the cheese. "Even the useless facts?"

"My factoids are hardly useless," Maura joined Jane. "_You've p_roven that."

"Yeah, well," The brunette made a face. "_Whatever._"

The Medical Examiner laughed. "So, tell me about New Mexico."

"Lots of Buffalo." The Investigator worked on cutting the cheese while Maura rummaged through her cabinets for wine. "My wine is down in the cellar."

"Oh, _the cellar_." Maura mocked then laughed softly. "Which way?"

Jane made a face as she pulled out olives for herself. "Down the hall. Take a left and it's the last door on the right. Be careful at the bottom of the stairs. There's a hole that I'm still waiting for the time to fix."

"My Goodness." The honey-blonde stole a piece of cheese. "Are you giving me directions to the lost city of Atlantis?" Jane only smiled as she finished cutting cheese. "You know," The smaller woman returned with a bottle of Champagne-Ardenne. "You could call someone to fix your flooring."

"Nah," The taller woman chewed on an olive. "I'd rather do it myself. It's free."

"You are still ridiculously difficult." Maura shook her head, disapprovingly.

"One of my best qualities." Jane grinned.

_It really is. _"Unfortunately," The honey-blonde drawled. The two women stood next to one another as they chewed away at cheese and olives. Maura sipped her wine while Jane decidedly downed her glass. "Anna reminded me a lot of you." The brunette admitted, quietly. "She was a doctor. Except you know, she generally liked to get to her patients _before t_hey died." Maura made a face at the detective's joke. "She's smart but unlike you she didn't like to rub it in my face everyday."

"I don't try to rub it in your face, Jane." The honey-blonde frowned. "I don't know how to not be me."

"I know." Jane grinned. "I was just kiddin'."

"To think I've missed your sense of humor."

"But you have." She nudged her friend. "I've missed your lack there of a sense of humor."

"I have a sense of humor," Maura pouted.

"Oh, right." The detective grabbed the bowl of olives and her wine. "You think the number eight wearing a belt is funny." She propped down on her couch, carefully managing the wine not to spill. She was quickly joined by Maura. The Medical Examiner had negotiated juggling their bottle of wine, her bowl of cheese and her wine.

"I can admit, it was the ambiance of the party that got to me." The honey-blonde crossed her legs. "Your return was a very big deal. Entirely unforeseen."

"Eh," Jane found it very difficult to keep her hands to herself. Maura was in such a close proximity to her. The wine was quickly traveling to the detective's head. She could smell Maura. Not just the light fragrance. But the natural aroma of the honey-blonde that she'd only had the chance of inhaling when she woke up next to the blonde after their seemingly innocent sleepovers. "That night was pretty fun, though. That Calvin guy was all over you."

Maura licked her lips as she glanced at her friend. "Calvin?"

_You're never going to remember him. _"The guy that told the funny joke about zeroes and eights, Maur."

"Oh, right." She sighed a dismissal. He wasn't of importance to her. "He wasn't the only one."

"No, he certainly was not." The detective glared. "I thought I was going to have to pry him off of you."

"What about Det. Palloway?" The smaller woman readjusted herself, scooting closer to the detective. "She was very interested in you."

"Didn't notice." The taller woman shrugged. _Was too busy eye-fucking you. Much like I am now_. Jane licked her lips as she stared down at Maura's cleavage. The Medical Examiner wore a dress that hugged her in the right places. It clung to her skin so tightly, Jane wondered if Maura had difficulty breathing in it. "I'll tell what I did notice. Ma going home with Stanley."

"The Boston Police Department favors adverting to him as OCDley." Maura poured her second glass of wine. "Your mother chose that name for him."

"Wouldn't think it," The brunette laughed. "She went home with him." Jane grimaced. "I don't even want to think of what kind of sex they had."

Maura chuckled as she plopped a cube of cheese into her mouth. "I'd prefer to keep that out of my imagination." She sighed. "Too late."

"Please don't envision my mother having OCD sex with Stanley." Jane frowned. "Please?"

"At least one of us are having sex." The honey-blonde leaned her head back onto the couch as she stared at the ceiling. "It has been a very long time for me."

Jane smiled at the slight victory. "I'm sorry." _I'm sorry, that I'm _not _sorry. _"I hear knitting is good for surgical hands. And dealing with frustration."

"I've tried everything, Jane." The smaller woman took more than a sip of her wine. It was almost Jane-like. "Knitting, cooking, cleaning. Jogging, dancing, yoga. I even tried kick-boxing. I think that discharged a wholly different type of frustration."

"Have you tried to, uh," The detective cleared her throat as she wiggled her fingers.

"Spirit fingers?" The Medical Examiner guessed.

"No," Jane rolled her eyes. "You know...have you tried to..." She tried again by wiggling only her index and middle fingers.

"Masturbate?" Maura breathed a laugh. "Jane, you are a grown woman. You should be comfortable with using the term instead of hand gestures."

"I thought we all agreed I'm still a child at heart." Jane bashed her eyelashes.

"No, we all agreed that you are immature." The honey-blonde smiled.

"So, you haven't tried to masturbate?" The detective made a face on the last word. It was more mockery.

"I have." Maura sighed. "It's hard to. I try, I get into it. But there's this image that stops me."

"What image?" Jane's question was quick, it almost startled Maura. She'd realized she was giving too much information.

"Nothing." She swallowed. "Anyways, it's just difficult."

Jane took the hint but that didn't mean she wanted to give up. "Is it an image of someone or is it like a piece of sh-scat with sprinkles all over it?"

Maura laughed at the visual the brunette created. "It's certainly not that."

"So, I'm guessing it's a person." The detective urged. "Who?" She wasn't sure if she wanted to know. No, she didn't want to know but she wanted to be a good friend. If it mean that Maura had to complain about seeing a man in her head while trying to get herself off, then she would just have to suck it up and deal with it. She'd just got Maura back. She couldn't compromise anything by letting her feelings get in the way.

_How can I lie without actually lying? Maura, that doesn't even make sense. _"Someone I've had feelings for."

"How long?" Jane felt like she'd swallowed an entire jar of peanut butter in one scoop.

"For a while." Maura licked her lips, nervously. "Seeing them has been difficult. The last time they left, it really hurt."

_Ian._ "Oh," The detective frowned. "Still not over him?"

_Him? Is she really this oblivious? _"Hmm," Maura hummed, noncommittally.

"I'm sorry. Maybe you could go to him?" _Apparently she is. _"Well that'll be hard as fuck considering Christmas is three days away. Maybe after New Years you could take a vacation to wherever he is?"

"No." Maura shook her head. "I can't."

"Why not?" Jane asked as she pulled herself from the couch. "Did he relocate or something? I can find him for you. It's not a problem." _Why the _fuck _did I just offer to do that? Jane, you fucking idiot. _

"That won't be necessary." Maura stayed put.

"Okay." The brunette happily let the offer drib. "So, do you have any plans for Christmas?"

"My parents will be here." The honey-blonde smiled. "We'll be having dinner with your family. You should join us."

"Nah," Jane was sitting next to Maura again. "I think I'll spend some time in the office. Got another case on my desk waiting for me."

"Can't it wait until after the Holidays?" The look Maura gave her made her heart break. It was a plead, it was a pout. It was something she wouldn't admit to.

_ Please don't look at me like your entire happiness depends on this._ The detective frowned. "I'm not sure." _I want to say yes but I can't jump back into this with both feet._ "Your parents probably hate me. I'm the girl that broke their daughter."

"My mother isn't one to hold grudges." The Medical Examiner didn't look at her friend. It'd been true. Jane had broke Maura. It'd been obvious to anyone with a pair of working eyes and ears. Jo Friday and Sadie Monday kickoffed a symphony of barks to the two women. Jane scooped Sadie into her arms and Jo gladly jumped into the honey-blonde's lap.

Jane smiled at the two. "She missed you."

"I've missed her." She said, mostly to Jo Friday. "I'm sure Bass has missed her."

"What about me?" The detective feigned hurt. "Has he missed me?"

"Jane," Maura looked at her, disapprovingly. "You called him _weird_."

"I called you weird all the time and you missed me!" Jane argued. When Maura simply gave her attention back to Jo Friday, Jane knew she'd won that argument. "You can stay here if you want. For the night." _Or forever. Whatever works for me. _

"I have had quite a lot to drink tonight." Maura glanced to the wine before them. The bottle was almost empty. She'd been working on her third glass. The honey-blonde then glanced to Jane then back to Jo Friday. Who seemed to be enjoying the ear massage. "Maybe this time I should sleep in your guest room."

"Look," Jane laughed. "I'm sorry I bombarded you then trapped into the bed with me."

_It wasn't a problem. _"May I ask what you were thinking when you climbed into the bed with me?"

"I thought you were someone else." The detective frowned. "I didn't know why I was in my guest room. I just knew that no one kicks Jane Rizzoli out of her bed."

"Except for Maura Isles." The Medical Examiner smirked.

"We'll see about that."

"Are you challenging me?" The honey-blonde let the small dog jump from her lap into the brunette's. Feeling only slightly abandoned. "Because, I don't like to be challenged."

"What if I am?" The detective smirked. "What are you going to do about it?"

"I'm going to take the high road." Maura licked her lips. "Simply because I am having excessively too much to drink, tonight."

"Right," Jane laughed. "So, no funny business with the neighbors?"

"Exactly." The honey-blonde nodded. "I've promised myself I wouldn't." She gulped down the rest of her wine. Although, that would be easy. Funny business with Jane would be the ambitious part. She wanted the brunette and her body was fitly conscious of it. She was abruptly aware of her sensitivity to light. Her uneven breaths. The way she couldn't help but lick her lips every time she stole a glance at the detective. Jane, for her part, seemed perfectly unaware.

"You really ought to scratch that itch, Maur." Jane shook her head disapprovingly. Maybe she hadn't been as unaware as Maura originally thought. But, the brunette was still clueless as to _who_ had her turned on.

"It has excelled the component of an itch." The honey-blonde frowned. The brunette looked at her friend. Every look to Maura, she was always stunned to see just how beautiful the honey-blonde was. Her naturally curly hair. The golden locks always shook when she gestured with her head. Maura had been looking down at the two dogs at her feet, but when she snapped her head up to make eye contact with Jane, her locks danced around her shoulders.

Jane couldn't breathe. She wanted to but she plainly couldn't. The way Maura looked at her. _She looks at me like I mean everything in the world to her_. The Medical Examiner licked her lips once more. And Jane almost passed out.

"Are you okay?" The detective could barely perceive the question. She could swear she had water in her ears. And she was sixty-thousand feet in the air. "Jane?"

"Sorry," She choked out. "I'm just..." _I'm just fucking dying, here. _"I'm sorry." She was away from the honey-blonde now, across the living room. "My heart is racing." She didn't have to check her pulse. She could feel it. The blood rushing throughout her veins. Everything happened in slow motion. Jane watched Maura leave the couch to come to her. The honey-blonde pressed to fingers against her neck. Her hands were soft. Her touch was soft. Although she was a Medical Examiner, she still had a doctor's touch.

"Jane," Maura was worried. "Jane, I need you to calm down. Does anything hurt?"

"No." The brunette shook her head. "Nothing hurts." Her words were croaked which only worried Maura even more. "Everything...feels..._good_." _Oh, God. I'm fucking crazy. _

"I'm sorry?" The Medical Examiner pulled her fingers back, a lot sooner than she'd wanted to.

"Everything feels good." Jane breathed. "I, uh, I don't know." She didn't want to go into detail but she felt like she had to. If she didn't, she'd burst. She needed to tell Maura. At that very moment in time she needed to tell her how she felt. "Maura, I," Her throat clenched. She wasn't going to let that stop her.

"Jane, I think you should lie down." The honey-blonde stared at her with uneasy eyes. She was determined for a fight with the brunette. But, she was going to win. Whatever was happening with her friend didn't seem emergency room serious but it did need to be taken care of.

"No, Maura." Jane grabbed her friend by the shoulders. She shook her slightly as if to free the doctor's head of the wine. "No, I need to tell you this. Because I think I'm happy. I feel really fucking happy. I haven't felt like this in so long. God, Maura. Don't you feel it too? Touching you feels good. Just having my hands on you. Breathing the same air as you feels like a fucking cleanse. Looking at you makes my heart race and my knees weak."

"Jane," Her name was a question and yet the very answer to it. But she couldn't do it. She couldn't bring herself to admit how good it felt to be touched by Jane. To be looked at by her. To be watched by her. And God, did it feel really fucking good. "I can't." _I want to._ "You're drunk."

"I'm...not." She was but she hadn't realized it until now. "Maura, I love you."

"I love you too, Jane." The honey-blonde smiled. "Please, just come lie down."

The brunette took a sharp breath. "No." She let her hands fall. "I'm not going to go lie down. Because as soon as I do, this feeling is over. I just want to enjoy it. I want to enjoy being happy for the first fucking time in five years. Do you have any idea what it's been like, Maur? Being with random women just to see if something will click. And for eight fucking years, I've been actively trying to ignore how I feel about you."

"We can't do this now, Jane." Her voice was soft. She wanted it. Just as badly as Jane but she couldn't take it now. She couldn't take advantage of the detective's temporary feelings. "Tomorrow. We can discuss of this tomorrow. Maybe at lunch."

"I don't want to talk about it tomorrow!" Jane was well aware that she seemed to be acting like a five year old. "I want to talk about it now, Maura. Because I think I'll die if I don't."

"You're not going to die." _Not on my watch. _"You're just having a reaction to the wine."

"Fine." The brunette frowned. "Fine. But we're talking about this tomorrow. I'll show you that this isn't the wine talking. Maura, I'm in love with you. I have been since the day I met you."

_Say it again, please._ "Jane." The honey-blonde was no longer trying to stop her. The words healed any open cuts in her heart.

"Yeah," Jane nodded as she stepped slowly closer to the smaller woman. "Who's having a reaction now?" Her words were low. Barely audible. Just a whisper from her lips that bounced onto the honey-blonde's lips. Then she caught them with her own. Maura tasted of cheese and wine. An excellent combination that complemented her.

Jane tasted of wine and olives. The aroma, peppered with her arousal made the moment too much to bear. She could taste Jane. Not just what the brunette had to eat and drink but she could taste _Jane._ Her pulsed seemed to be in a race with the detective's. Maura's arms wrapped around the brunette's neck. They rested on her shoulders as the detective moved her lips to kiss anything she could. Jane kissed Maura's cheek, her jaw, the edge of her jaw. Until she reached the Medical Examiner's neck. She could feel the fast pulse there. It throbbed against her lips. Against her tongue. She sucked at it just to hear Maura moan. _This is happening. _The brunette self-congratulated.

Jane wrapped her arms around Maura's waist to support both them. It was obvious they were both weak in the knees but neither of them wanted to let the moment go. They stared at each other. Asking unspoken questions. Only to answer them with the blink of an eye or a smile. Yes seemed to be the common answer. Yes, I'm in love with you. Yes, I've always wanted you. Yes, I want to fuck like rabbits with you.

"Jane," Maura had said her name so many times tonight. Every time seemed to have a different meaning to it. This one was an answer. Maura was smart. She knew what alcohol did to Jane. "I think we should go to bed." She pulled her arms away, then stepped out of the detective's embrace. It was more difficult than she'd originally planned. Not because Jane held her there with all of her might but because she simply just _did not want_ to end the physical contact. "I can't do this with you, right now."

Jane looked like a beaten puppy. One that had just been abandoned. "Okay."

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**Author's Nose: Oh you nasty. You fell for it. Mwuahahehehoho I am so evil. But I do this out of love. We're getting there. I promise. Now review or I'll circumcise your nipples. **


	13. This Is Most Likely What It Looks Like

The only time Jane Rizzoli ever slept in was when she had a hangover. This definitely one of those mornings. The sun annoyed the fuck out of her. Anything cheerful was definitely going to be shot right in the damn head. She wasn't sure why she'd waken up in such a bad mood. She just knew that she had one and there was clearly a reason for it.

"Morning Jo and Sadie." She greeted her dogs but barely gave them more than a second glance. In her kitchen, she noticed the tall empty wine bottle. Normally, wine didn't get to her as much. Especially if she shared the bottle. But, for some reason last night her body was like a sponge. Jane scratched the back of her head as she looked into the refrigerator. It was still early enough to make breakfast. But, she had no appetite. In fact, everything made her want to throw up. She closed the refrigerator door with a slam then ran to the bathroom.

Maura had been across the hall, in the guest room. She'd woken up five minutes before the brunette. Normally, the Medical Examiner never drank so much she forgot what the hell happened. But, here she was. Confused as to how she got into this bed. The last thing she remembered was retrieving a bottle of wine from Jane's cellar. The human mind has the ability to forget what one simply does not want to remember. The trick is to access that ability. The consumption of alcohol is known to help. There was something she didn't want to remember. She wasn't sure if she was more interested in trying to remember it or trying to figure out why she would want to forget it.

When Maura heard Jane in the bathroom, she quickly pulled herself from the bed. She wore a shirt that obviously belonged to Jane. It barely covered her where she needed it to most.

"Jane," The Medical Examiner knocked on the door softly, carefully not to open it. "Are you okay?"

"No, I'm throwing up my intestines." Was the sharp reply.

Maura shifted on the balls of her feet. "I'm coming in."

"Don't." There was a push on the door and Jane stopped it. "Don't come in here."

"What's wrong?" _Stupid question._

"Just don't come in here." _Because as soon as I see you, everything is going to be either really good or really bad. _"Just stay out there."

"Okay." Maura frowned but heeded the warning. She went into the kitchen to make them coffee. She too noticed the tall empty bottle of wine. She also noticed their bowls in the sink. Jo and Sadie were asleep in the living room. Not even _they_ would remember what happened last night.

Nothing could have happened. It wasn't like she'd woken up naked next to Jane. But she couldn't shake the feeling that there was something to remember. She wanted to remember it but she knew better to just trust her body.

"I'm sorry about that." Jane was wiping some water off her face. "I just woke up with the world on top of me, today."

Maura had heard the expression a lot from Angela. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Jane nodded. "I feel really pissed. I don't know why. Because I don't remember dick." She shrugged as Maura gave her a look of warning. "Look, I'm so pissed I don't care about censoring my language."

"I'm having difficulty remembering last night, as well." The honey-blonde frowned. "I remember going to get this bottle of wine." She gestured to the empty bottle that once was Champagne-Ardenne. "Then I remember waking up. Our minds are very good at blocking out memories. Accompanied with alcohol? I'm surprised I remember last night at all."

"I just want to know what the fuck I'm so pissed about." Jane sighed in frustration. "And I'm hungry. But if I even think about food, I throw up."

"Your body is going through withdrawals." The Medical Examiner leaned against the island. The shirt hiked up just a millimeter. But it was enough to catch the detective's attention. Her thighs were cream colored. Jane couldn't help but wonder if they were as smooth as they looked. I'll have to accidentally brush against her or something.

"Shit," Jane looked at her watch.

"What?" Maura happily ignored the foul language. She was more than aware of her own withdrawals. She had a headache. One that claimed every inch of her brain. There wasn't a part of her head that didn't hurt.

"When I'm late like this, Eve comes." She took a deep breath as she looked around. It didn't look like they'd had a house party but something seemed off. She felt like she needed to clean up or whatever it was that they did last night would be apparent. "She's like you. She feels like she needs to check up on me."

"She's just being a good friend." Maura smiled at the detective. "You really should appreciate her."

"You're a good friend. I appreciate you." Jane turned to Maura. "But that doesn't mean I'm jumping for joy every time you worry about me."

"Hmm," The Medical Examiner accepted the compliment. "Then maybe she's just doing her job. She's your assistant."

"Maybe." The detective wasn't buying it but she had no energy to argue. Any argument at this point would probably turn into World War Three. "You know, if you're hungry you can cook."

"I wouldn't feel right." Maura frowned. "It's your home."

"You haven't been a guest in my home in eight years," The brunette grinned. "Even if we've spent five years apart."

"Don't remind me." The honey-blonde frowned. "The thought of food makes you ill, anyway. I'll just pick something up on my way to work."

"Which you should be getting to." She reminded.

"Right." Maura nodded. The garage door opened and she saw the brown hair before she saw the face. It was Eve.

"Oh, Good. You're awake." The brunette said to her boss. "I thought I was going to have to come beat you with a bat."

"Ha, ha." Jane rolled her eyes.

"Hello, Dr. Isles." Eve walked to the bar in the kitchen. The doctor only smiled in return. She noticed the lack of clothing on Maura. "_Oh_."

"Oh?" The detective raised an eye-brow. "What's 'oh' mean?" She followed the other woman's gaze. "Oh, no. No. No. This isn't what it looks like."

"Hey, I'm not judging." Eve threw her hands up.

"It really isn't what it looks like." Maura said. _At least, I'm not entirely sure of that._ "I'm guessing I didn't have anything to sleep and took whatever I could find. But, nothing happened." _Again, I'm not completely sure of that. _

"So there was drinking involved?" The brunette smirked. Jane looked at her flatly. "Sure, sure." The assistant smiled.

"I should get going." Maura said to Jane. The detective nodded.

"She slept over again?" Eve whispered when Maura closed the guestroom door. "At least this time it looks like something happened."

Jane looked at her. "Nothing happened."

"Are you sure?"

"No." The brunette frowned. "But, I'm pretty sure whatever happened, I'm willing to forget."

"Okay, okay." Eve nodded. "I won't push."

"Thank you."

When Maura returned from the bedroom, she wore the dress she'd been wearing the previous night. Her heels were by the door so she padded to them. Jane had been eating cereal on the couch and Eve had been on the computer.

"I see you got your appetite back." Maura smiled.

"Yeah," Jane sat the almost empty bowl down and walked around the couch to the honey-blonde. "Listen, maybe we could have lunch together."

"We'll see." The Medical Examiner smirked. "I meant what I said last night. I do still consider you my closest friend."

"I know." The detective grinned. "Get to work before another Medical Examiner is named chief."

"I'll call you." Maura promised.

"I'll answer." Jane countered. She pressed her lips against the honey-blonde's cheek then pulled away, quickly. "Drive safe."

"Thanks." Was Maura's reply as she left. When Jane turned around to go back to her seat on the couch, Eve had been staring at her.

_Talk about creepy. _"What?" She fell onto the couch. "Don't look at me like that."

"Are you aware that you just kissed her?" The other brunette looked at her over the rim of her reading glasses.

"I'm aware I just kissed her on the cheek." Jane's brows knitted together. "What's so wrong with that?"

"No," Eve shook her head. "No, you didn't kiss her on the cheek. You basically kissed her on the lips."

"I didn't." The detective was starting to get irritated. "I kissed her on the cheek."

"You kissed her on the corner of her mouth."

"So fucking what?" Jane clenched her jaw for a moment. "What's so fucking wrong about that? It's not like we made out or something. I just kissed her."

"There's nothing wrong with it." Eve retreated. "I just wanted you to know that if you're trying to hide your feelings for her, it's not working. The way you look at her, it's really obvious how you feel. I don't just mean the way you lust after her. You look at her like she means everything to you. Like she's the most important person to you. You look at her like you want to do nothing but make sure she's happy. And you look at everyone else like there's a need to protect her from them. I can tell that you're in love with her and you're doing a piss poor job at hiding it. But, you know what else I can tell? Because you don't have to be a world-class investigator to figure this shit out. She's in love with you too. She lets you look at her that way and she doesn't say shit about it. My guess is that she likes it. She looks at you the same way. She feels the need to protect you but unlike you she doesn't have the training so she doesn't know how."

"Jane, she's in love with you. I don't know how the hell you've gone eight years without realizing it. Which kind of scares me, because I don't know how you can be such a great fucking detective and not see that the women you're in love with has the same damn feelings for you. It's sad, Jane. And I bet if you asked her, she'd tell you. Cause she's honest like that, right? She can't lie, right? Especially to you. I bet if you asked her, she'd tell you how she feels. If_ I _asked her, she'd tell me in a roundabout lie."

Jane was speechless. Breathless. Almost lacking a pulse. She was frozen, staring at where she'd seen Maura last. The door. _She can't be in love with me. No._ "It's impossible." Jane snapped to. "She's in love with Ian. She said so."

"Did she actually say it or did you just assume it?" Eve was patient with her. Eve was honest with her. For four years, the other woman had done nothing but be honest with her. _So, why would she be lying now? She wouldn't._

"You probably misread her feelings." The detective looked at her friend. "She just really missed me."

"Why do you think that is?" Jane was sure Eve would have made a really good therapist. _Which is what I truly need._

"Because we haven't really seen each other in five years." The brunette ran her fingers through her hair. "Because we didn't end on good terms. I killed her biological father. And while her mother was in the hospital, I was having sex with someone I thought I could trust. Instead of being there for her. I was a terrible friend to her the last twenty-four hours of our friendship."

"But if you were so terrible," Eve sat next to Jane. "Don't you think she would have just moved on? Have you ever known Maura to keep unwarranted feeling for someone?"

"No." The detective shook her head.

"Then you should be able to see that she at least has _some _feelings for you."

"She has some feelings for me." Jane repeated, numbly. "Maura has feelings for me."

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**Author's Nose: See? We're getting there. And we'll get closer if I get to 115 reviews. Yeah I changed it because I couldn't wait to post this chapter. :) Now go review if you want some Rizzles tittyboobs. By the way, I wrote this chapter while menstruating and listening to A Day To Remember. If anyone deserves an award for not just writing "fuck you" over and over again, it's me. **


	14. Fight No Flight

**Author's Nose: Since I am menstruating, I'm feeling selfish and generous. How? Well, you get three or four chapters today. But in return I am expecting 145 reviews. **

* * *

The first person Maura recognized as she walked into the Boston Police Department headquarters was Angela. The older Rizzoli had been leaving the elevator. She had probably just finished dropping off lunch for Frankie._ Just like she used to do with Jane._ Maura smiled at the thought.

"Maura," Angela grinned as she looked up and locked eyes with the Medical Examiner. "You're here late."

"I know." The honey-blonde returned the smile to her friend.

"On a scale from one to ten, how badly does Janie want to kill me?" The older woman looked at her apologetically.

"On a scale from one to ten?" Maura thought for a moment. "Last night, it was possibly a billion. But, this morning, I'm sure she's in a good mood."

"Oh?" Angela grinned. "What happened?"

_ If only I could answer that. _"I'm not sure." Maura frowned as she followed Angela into the cafe. The older woman stopped abruptly when she noticed Stanley at the counter. She turned to Maura. "You two haven't talked?"

Angela shook her head, frantically. "It's not something I want to just talk about." She swallowed hard. "Please tell me he's not looking at me."

Maura peeked over the other woman's shoulder. "He's not looking at you?"

"Now say it like it's true."

"I can't." The Medical Examiner bit her bottom lip. "He doesn't look mad. If that helps..."

"No," Angela covered her face with her hands. "It doesn't. It means he has feelings for me."

_Like mother, like daughter._ "He's giving you a look." Maura smirked. "The look most men give when they've seen a woman naked."

"Stop looking at him!" The older woman slapped the younger woman's arm. "I don't want him to know we're talking about him."

"I'm sorry." Maura bit back her laughter. "Can I have coffee,_ please?_" She bashed her eyelashes at the older woman.

"If you can distract Stanley." Angela sighed and shook her head, sadly. "This is what I get for trying to have a life. Frank has married someone younger than our youngest son. And I'm stuck trying to avoid my boss."

Maura looked at her friend, sympathetically. "You really should talk things out with him." The younger woman advised. "It's healthy. I've learned recently that discussing mistakes helps you realize how you can avoid them again."

"I'll discuss it when I'm dead." Angela frowned as she turned to go retrieve coffee.

Maura made due on her promise and walked right up to Stanley. "You know," She tapped her fingers against the counter. "You look tired. Have you been sleeping well?"

"Uh," The older man looked at her. "What's it to you?"

_Bitter old Stanley._ "I'm a doctor. It's my job to care."

"I thought your job was to dissect dead bodies?" His attention had been on Angela, who'd walked around him. "Hey, Angie." He grinned.

"Uh, hi." She glared.

"How are you?"

"I'm working." She mustered up her best angry Jane Rizzoli look. Jane must've gotten the look from one of her parents, right? It certainly hadn't been Angela. And she was finding that out a little too late. "Please tell me Jane didn't storm out of the restaurant last night?"

"She didn't." Maura grinned. "We had a nice dinner."

"Good." The other woman smiled. "So you guys talked and all? About what happened?"

"Yes." The Medical Examiner nodded. "We talked. I've forgiven her. She has forgiven me. We are slowly getting to where we need to be."

"Where do you think you need to be?"

"In the morgue." Maura shrugged. "I'm sure Dr. Pike is doing just fine without me."

_It's torturous, sometimes._ "No." Angela shook her head. "With Jane. Where do you think you two need to be?"

The Medical Examiner thought for a moment. "I'm not sure." It wasn't a lie. She hadn't been sure. She knew exactly where she'd wanted to be with Jane. She wanted to be with the detective. She wanted more than that. She didn't just want to date Jane. She didn't want to call Jane her "girlfriend" because that wouldn't justify what the brunette meant to her. No. She needed Jane. A girlfriend could be lived without. She couldn't live without Jane. Not again. It was painful the last time. She barely survived it. But, now she had Jane back. She had Jane back and she needed more. Friendship wouldn't suffice. Not this time around.

"Are you in love with her?" It was a whisper. Although the only people left in the cafe had been them.

Maura licked her lips before nodding. "Yes." The answer was easy on her tongue. She thought the first time admitting her feelings about Jane to Angela would be difficult. Angela seemed to be the judgmental type. _That's what you get for assuming. _

"Thank you for being honest with me." The older woman smiled. "I already knew it, though. When Jane left, it hit you the hardest. At first, I thought it was because you felt guilty but when I looked at you, I saw more than guiltiness. I saw an emptiness. No. I saw emptiness. Just plain emptiness. You were completely empty and you have been ever since. You're just starting to get some color back in your cheeks." Maura smiled. "I can only assume she has something to do with it."

Maura's smile grew. "Yes." She looked down at the coffee her hands had been cupped around on the table. "She has everything to do with it."

"Do you know how she feels about you?" _Please say yes or Janie is going to kill me._ "You have to know. It's not the world's best kept secret. Hell, I heard Frost and Frankie talking about it this morning."

"I'm aware." Maura sighed. "I'm just not sure if I'm the only woman she's in love with."

"Why would you think that?" Angela cupped her hands around Maura's. "She's head of hills for you, Doc."

"She met a woman." Maura glared. "Anna. She fell in love with her."

Angela's shoulders hunched. "Oh," Her frown grew. "Sweetie, I'm so sorry."

"I waited for her." The Medical Examiner admitted. "I waited for her to realize who she was. I waited for her to realize how she felt. I waited for her to come back. I think I waited too long. I think I missed my chance."

"No." Angela shook her head. "No, love like yours doesn't have an expiration date. It's not like the love I had with Frank. The love you two have is real. It's withstood a _lot_. You'll never run out of chances."

"How can I be sure she won't just run?" It's one of the things she's best at. Top of that list being a good person. "How can I be sure I can trust her not to leave me when things get hard?"

"You can't." Angela tightened her hold around Maura's hands. "But, that's what love is. You try. You try and you never give up."

* * *

"Jane?" Eve waved a hand in front of the detective. "Jane, say something." The brunette had been frozen. The only movement from here was her even breaths and blinks. She was in shock. Eve alternated between claps and snaps to pull her boss back to reality.

"We kissed." Were the first words from Jane in twenty minutes. "We kissed last night. I didn't want to remember it. But, I kept trying to_ think._ How did I not notice her feelings? After all of these years? How could I be so fucking inattentive? So fucking dumb."

"You were so afraid of rejection, you neglected the signs." The other brunette frowned. "Most of those years you didn't even want to admit to_ yourself_ that _you _had feelings for _her_."

"Anna told me the same thing you told me." Jane blinked. "When I told her about Maura. She asked me if I'd been in love with her. That's when I really thought about it. About a week later when I told her I was, she told me I should come back here because from the sound of it; it seemed like Maura was in love with me."

"Is that why you came back?"

"I think so." Jane couldn't be sure. She felt a need to be in Boston. The need tore her apart but delighted her, concurrently. She didn't know why she needed to be there but the further away from Boston she was, the more it hurt and the less it beguiled her. She knew it was Maura. She just didn't know why she needed to be near Maura. They'd had nothing. No friendship. No relationship. Not even communication. But she felt like she could still protect Maura from anything. Just by being in the same city as her. "What do I do? Eve, what the fuck do I do? She didn't want me. What if I waited too long? What if I fucked up before I even got the chance to have her? What do I fucking do?"

"You fight for her." Eve took her friend's hands. "You fight for her until you have her for yourself. It's not going to be easy and it's probably not going to happen today or tomorrow. It might not happen until you're ninety years old. But you fucking fight for her. You know why? Because she's the only fucking person in this world that makes you feel something. You _fight_ for her because if you don't, you'll never be happy again. You fight for her because without you, she has no one in this world who can _and_ will love her like you do. You fucking fight, Jane."


	15. Show And Tell

Maura was at her desk. Her mind was heavily concentrated on Jane. Not like she had a problem with it. She was supposed to be reading a file but to be quite honest, her mind wasn't comprehending any of the words. This had never really been a problem for Maura. Nothing took up her mind like Jane. Even when her mother had been hit by a car, she hadn't been this distracted. Actually, she'd been able to use her job as the distraction. But, with Jane, there was nothing. Jane was the distraction and nothing else could remedy it.

"Dr. Isles," Dr. Pike knocked on the door. "There's someone here to see you."

_Jane._ Maura smiled and nodded. "Thank you." She excused him from the room and closed her laptop. She ran her fingers through her hair before she got to the threshold of her office door. She needed to look her best for Jane. Although she hadn't done anything physically exhilarating, she still didn't feel like she looked good enough. The Medical Examiner walked around the small hallway until she reached the elevators. _Not Jane. _She saw the back of her mother's head and her tall father standing next to her.

"Mother." She forced a smile. "Father." Her surprise was obvious. She hid her disappointment well. She wanted to be happy to see them. Actually, she had been happy to see them but they weren't who she _wanted_ to see right now.

"Maura, dear." Constance Isles wrapped her arms around her daughter. Roland Isles wrapped his arms around his wife and daughter.

"What are you doing here?" Maura was the first to pull away. She hadn't been quite used to physical contact with her parents. She wasn't sure if she'd ever get used to it.

"We said we would be here for Christmas." Roland's face perfectly displayed confusion. "Did you forget, dear?"

"No." Maura shook her head. "No, I meant what are you doing _here_?" Her hands emphasized her question.

"Oh," Constance laughed. "Your father has never seen you at work." She frowned at the blouse and skirt her daughter wore. "Shouldn't you be in scrubs or something? Or at least a coat?"

"I haven't had much time in the morgue." Maura looked down at her attire. "I've been doing paperwork for the most part. Here, let's go upstairs. There's really nothing to see down here."

"What about your office?" Roland offered. "You are the Chief Medical Examiner of Boston, aren't you? You _must_ have an office."

"I do." Maura nodded as she turned around. "You're right. I'll show you my office." She heard them behind her. Her mother's heels echoing her own.

"It's beautiful." Constance awed as she and Roland peered into Maura's workspace.

"As beautiful as offices can get, I suppose." Maura looked around. She'd redecorated after Jane had left. She couldn't stand the reminder of the detective. Everything had seemed tainted. "I spend a lot of time in here, actually. After performing autopsies, I come back here to begin the case note."

"And, what about the other Medical Examiners? Do they give you trouble?"

"Only one." The honey-blonde frowned. "I think it's because he's older than me."

"It's always the older ones." Constance looked to Roland.

"Would you like coffee? Are you hungry? You must be tired from your flight." Maura swallowed hard. Truthfully, she didn't want anyone to see her give her parents a tour of the building. It seemed juvenile. To give a show and tell of your job. "I'm sure Angela is would be really happy to see you."

"Yes," Constance smiled, excitedly. "I haven't seen her since Thanksgiving. How is she?"

"Why don't we go ask her?" Maura walked to the door and pushed them gently out of her office. On the way out, she turned off the lights and locked her door.

"Dr. Isles." One of the lab techs called as Maura and her family entered the elevator. "I got the results back for the Jane Doe."

"Thank you." Maura took the folder from him. He looked at Mr. and Mrs. Isles then back to Maura.

"Are these your parents?" His disbelief bothered her. Maura didn't look like either of her parents. She had a resemblance to Constance but if you looked hard enough, you would be able to see that it was just that. A resemblance. No relation.

"_That will be all._" The Medical Examiner said through clenched teeth. He apologized and left. When the elevator doors closed, the short ride was quiet. Mr. Isles had cleared his throat at one point and Maura shifted on her feet.

When the elevator doors opened, Maura internally cursed her luck. "Hey, Doc." Barry grinned. "Where are you headin'?"

"Hello, Det. Frost." She led her parents into the cafe.

"Ah, come up for some Joe?" He followed along side her. "I can get it for you."

"That won't be necessary." Maura knew she couldn't hate Barry for long. She actually didn't plan to. But, she did enjoy watching him jump through hoops for her. "Thank you." She smiled at him. It'd been the first smile he received in two weeks.

"You forgive me?" His grin displayed his hope.

_Who can say no to a face like that?_ "Yes." She nodded. She could tell he was about to jump for joy. "But," She said, firmly. "If you disrespect me or my work again, I'll make sure solving cases becomes a hell of a lot harder."

"Got it." He wrapped his arms around her and squeezed as hard as he could. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

"Frost, please." The honey-blonde croaked. "I...am...having...difficulty...breathing."

"Sorry." He pulled away. She exhaled, deeply. "I'm just...I thought it would take a lot more than that."

"Yeah, well." The Medical Examiner shrugged. "Have you seen Mrs. Rizzoli?"

"Yeah," He rubbed the back of his head. "She said something about hiding from Stanley." He shrugged, willing to let his confusion go.

"Hmm," Maura looked around the cafe. Stanley had still been working the counter. "Barry, I'd like you to meet my parents."

"Nice to meet you." Barry extended his hand.

"Det. Frost and I used to work together." Maura explained as they exchanged handshakes.

"That is until..." He trailed off.

"Until his partner killed Patrick Doyle." The honey-blonde finished for him. "Yes, they're aware of what Jane did. We've all moved on."

"It's very nice to meet you, Det. Frost." Roland smiled. "I wish I could tell you I've heard a lot about you. Our Maura isn't very big on sharing her professional life."

"Or personal." Constance threw in.

Maura glared. "Well, I'm sure Barry can tell you all about what I do for a living. Although, it seems to be self explanatory."

"But, you're the best at what you do." Barry gestured to an available table. "That's not self explanatory."

"Well, it explains why I'm chief." Maura smiled. "I'm going to go find Angela. I'll be right back." Before her parents could even protest, her heels signified her exit. The first place Maura checked was the restrooms on the first floor. Then, she checked the bullpen for the Homicide Unit. When she'd called the older woman's cell phone and it went straight to voicemail, she couldn't decide if she should just give up or be worried. The Medical Examiner went back down to her office to see if Angela had been waiting down there for her.

She wondered how long Barry could keep her parents busy. He was very good at talking. Maura had experienced it firsthand.

* * *

"You're staring at the pot like you're going to fall in." Eve smiled from across the kitchen. Jane looked at her then glared. "What? I'm just saying."

"I'm a little tired." The detective looked down at the pot of Alfredo pasta in front of her. "Today has been really emotionally exhausting."

"You're telling me." The other woman laughed, softly. "Try being me. I've had to risk my job to prove to my best friend that the love of her life is in love with her."

"Thanks for that." Jane stirred the pot for the fifth time in ten minutes. "I wouldn't have fired you. I probably would have de-promoted you to janitor, though."

"How are you holding up?"

"I feel...tired."

"Kind of told me that already." Eve laughed. "I'm looking for new information."

"She wanted me to join our families for Christmas dinner." Jane sighed. "How fucked up does that sound? Is this situation as fucked up as it sounds? She had to invite me to dinner with my own family. Have I really made it this fucked up?"

"Afraid so."

Jane rubbed her eyes, tiredly. "I'd kill just to kiss her again." She backed away from the pot and leaned against the island. "I can't wait to see her again. And I can't help but wonder if she's thinking about me too."

"I bet she is." Eve smiled.

"She said she's call." Jane frowned. "I'm so tired but I want to talk to her."

"You're keeping yourself awake just to talk to her." It wasn't a question. "How cute."

"Fuck off." The brunette ran her fingers through her hair. "I don't even know where to start, Eve. Do I ask her out on a date?"

"You could." Eve shrugged. "You could ask her out to dinner. You could talk to her about your feelings. You could just sext her. It really doesn't matter _where_ you start."

"Just as long as I start somewhere." The detective's voice was quiet. She was fighting sleep and losing the battle, terribly.

Eve nodded. "Exactly." She walked around the kitchen. "You should get some sleep."

"I don't want sleep." _I want her._ "I have paperwork I need to do."

"I'll have Tony do it." She took the wooden spoon from her boss' hands. "You need sleep."

"Don't want to." The brunette took the spoon back.

"My God," Eve rolled her eyes. "I've met _children _more cooperative than you, Jane Rizzoli." Jane made a face of mockery. "I think I hear your phone ringing." She grinned.

"Shit, really?" The detective bolted from the kitchen to the living room. She didn't hear the ring in there so she jogged to her bedroom. She didn't hear anything. _Ah, fuck. "_You were fucking with me, weren't you?"

"Yes." Eve was at her bedroom door now. "And it was totally worth it. Even if it means I'll spend the rest of my life as a janitor."

Jane glared. "I really fucking hate you."

"You absolutely love me." The other woman made an angelical face.

"Only because you're just as fucked up as me." Jane sat down on the edge of her bed. "Think she'll call?"

"If she doesn't, I don't see any harm in just calling her." Eve picked up the brunette's cell phone from the nightstand. She handed it to her.

Jane mouthed a thanks before dialing Maura's number._ I kind of love that her number is still the same. _

The phone rang three times before the Medical Examiner answered. "Hey you,"

She flirtin' with me? "Hey." Jane smiled, tiredly. She lied back on her bed. _Paradise. _

"I sense some phone sex is about to start." Eve interrupted. "I'll just get my purse and leave."

Jane laughed and closed her eyes. "Who's that?" Maura asked.

"Eve." The detective yawned. "She was just leaving."

"Ah," The honey-blonde was silent for a moment.  
"You don't remember." Jane stated.

"Is there something to remember?" Maura's reply was delayed.

_ She must've thought about it first. _Jane thought about her options. They could have this conversation over the phone or they could discuss it in person. "Are you busy tonight?"

"Actually," Maura's guilt stained her voice "I am. My parents came early."

"Oh." Jane's disappointment was unmistakable in only one word.

"You are more than welcome to join us." The Medical Examiner quickly invited. "Actually, I'm begging you to come."

"I thought you said your parents are great now." The detective rolled over.

"They are peculiarly fascinated by aspects of my life that I have not shared with them just yet." Maura sighed. "It's pestiferous because I am a very cloistered person."

Jane yawned again. "What time is dinner?" A free meal and a chance to see her. This is shaping up to be a good day.

"Seven?" There had been a noise in the background. "Yes, mother. I can drive you there."

The detective waited patiently for Maura's attention. "Everything okay?"

"Yes." Maura said through clenched teeth. "I'll see you at seven?"

"Yup," Jane smiled.

"I suggest you take a nap before you drive." The Medical Examiner smirked.

"I'll sleep when I'm dead."

"I've never understood that expression." The honey-blonde frowned. "Why would one choose to sleep when they're dead? Are people really unaware that sleep deprivation can lead to death?"

"No, it's kind of a different way of saying Carpe Diem."

"Carpe Diem has nothing to do with starving your body of rest." Maura sighed, disapprovingly. "It's all about seizing the day. Not the night."  
"Maur, I don't understand why you're chewing me out about this."

"Because you've used the expression."

Jane glared. "I'm sorry. I'll take a nap so I don't accidentally drive my car off a bridge."

"Do never joke of that." The Medical Examiner invoked.

"I'll see you tonight, Maur." Jane smiled. She hung up before Maura could get to instructions on what to wear. The detective yawned one more time before letting sleep devour her.

* * *

_The buffalo. That was how she'd known she was back in New Mexico. The buffalo, the heat, and the lack of people around her. There had been a lake behind the summer home. She could hear some of the animals starting their mornings. Jane opened the red door of the white home. The house should have been empty. But something told her that it wasn't. Jane went to her bag to retrieve her gun. But next to her bags had been another set of bags. These looked far more expensive than her own. No intruder would bring suitcases when performing a robbery. Not any smart ones. The plan should have been to grab and go. But, these bags indicated someone was here to stay._

_ The detective walked to the large bedroom. Sweat clung to her skin. Her face flush. She pulled her head phones out of her ear just in case she needed to be on edge. The floorboards creaked, signaling her presence. In the bedroom had been an arm. Much like the arm she'd seen in her bed after Vince's party in Boston. There had been curly honey-blonde hair. Maura. She knew better than to assume now. Just to be sure, she pulled the blanket back, slightly. Sure enough, it'd been Maura Isles. Dr. Maura Isles. In New Mexico. With her. _

_ Confusion overtook her as she walked around the bedroom. She couldn't remember getting back to New Mexico. She couldn't even remember waking up._

_ There was a stir from the bed, then a moan. "Jane," Maura whispered, tiredly. "Sweetie, come back to bed." _

Huh?_ "Maur?" Jane turned to her friend. _

_ "Come back to bed." The honey-blonde sighed. _

_ "Okay." _She shouldn't have to tell me twice._ The brunette quickly rid herself of her running shoes and climbed into the bed. Maura grabbed her arm and wrapped it around her waist. She scooted back into the brunette's body. _

_ "How was your run?" The Medical Examiner asked, sleepily. _

_ "It was...okay." _I'm not a hundred percent on that but whatever._ "How was your...sleep?" _

_ Maura rolled over. She could detect the detective's confusion. "Are you okay?" Her eyes still hadn't been opened. But she could feel Jane's breath against her lips and she reached to find the source. Their lips connected and Jane didn't that she was confused, now. Maura's lips parted in invitation and the detective took the hint, gladly. Her tongue inched the honey-blonde's mouth, hesitantly. Just so Maura could back out at any moment. When the Medical Examiner took matters into her own hands by sucking onto the detective's tongue, Jane couldn't help her breathy laugh. _Maura Isles is impatient in the morning.

_ The kiss grew. They were both hungry for each other. Jane more than Maura because this was new to her. She wasn't used to having the honey-blonde in bed with her. Having her in her arms. Having her all over her like this. _

_ Maura climbed on top of Jane. "I'm so ready for you." She whispered as she battled the brunette's ear. Sucking on the lobe. _

_ Jane purred._ I don't know how she knows to do but goddamn it that feels good. _"Maur," The brunette was breathless. And she was going to be inarticulate if Maura kept up her act. "Maur, I think we should slow down." _

_ "Slow down?" The Medical Examiner smirked. "Jane, I have no interest in going slow with you." _

_ The detective swallowed hard. "This can't be real." She groaned. She tried to get a hold of the honey-blonde but everywhere she touched was fervent skin. She looked down. _She's naked. Oh fuck.

_ "It's real." The smaller woman's core left wet kisses as she climbed down Jane's body. "I'll show you just how real it is." _

_ "Maur." Jane closed her eyes. "God, this can't be real." _

_ Maura paid no mind to her. She kissed the detective's hard abdomen in silent worship. She pulled down the brunette's shorts and hoped Jane could handle getting them from around her own ankles. "You have a very beautiful body." The Medical Examiner kissed just above Jane's belly button. "It's hard and soft. I realize the opposition of my description but it's very fascinating, Jane." _

_ The brunette couldn't think. She had to reminded herself to breath or she would've passed out. "Maura," _

_ The honey-blonde kissed the top of her thigh. "I love making love to you after your runs." Jane watched the smaller woman lick her lips. "While you're on your runner's high. It's very intoxicating. You're so powerful and determined." _

Breathe._ "I, uh, I," The detective tried. _Breathe._ "I," She tried again._ Breathe. _She could feel the kisses traveling from the top of her thighs to just where she needed Maura's mouth to be. _Breathe.

_ "Shh," Maura breathed. _

_ Jane swallowed hard once more. _Breathe.


	16. You're Everything

Dinner was going to be either very interesting or very difficult. Maura's parents hadn't seen Jane in five years. Actually, Jane had never met Roland. Although he knew a lot of the detective, she didn't know much of him.

"I've invited Jane Rizzoli to dinner." She told her parents as she shrugged out of her coat. "She'll be here at seven."

"Oh, wonderful." Constance smiled, sincerely. "It will be nice to catch up with her."

"Maura, honey." Roland smiled. "Would you mind if your mother makes dinner? I'm afraid I have challeneged her. I'm certain she doesn't have the same skills to cook."

"I will certainly prove him wrong." Constance jabbed at her husband's arm.

"We'll see."

"That would be lovely." Maura smiled. "I have work to do." She didn't need to tell her parents to make themselves at home. This was another home to them and she wouldn't have had it any other way. "I'll be in my office." The Medical Examiner stayed in her office for an hour and a half before she heard the ring of her doorbell. Her father was already at the door.

"Maura, dear. You have a guest." He opened the door wider. It was a man. Jane could tell that because he'd been too broad to be Jane, although she couldn't see his face just yet.

"Darling," Ian smiled to the Medical Examiner. "How are you?" He wrapped his arms around her.

_No. This can't be happening. _"Ian," She tried to pull away. "What are you doing here?"

"I've missed you." He looked to her parents then back to her. "Oh, don't be silly. Constance and Roland love me. I'm sure not intruding on anything."

"Why didn't tell me you were coming?" She demanded, quietly. She didn't want to cause a scene in front her parents but this wasn't the time.

"Do I ever?" He laughed. "Why is it such a problem now?" He was unaffected by her surprise.

"It has always been a problem, Ian." She hissed. She grabbed his arm and pulled him to the porch. "You are not allowed to just show up at my home whenever you please."

"It has never been a problem before." His smile faded, rather quickly. "Is there someone there?"

"You haven't been here in five years, Ian." Maura crossed her arms on her chest. "A lot has changed."

"Is there someone there?" He demanded. "Just tell me, love. I'm willing to fight."

"Ian, I am not the same woman." She dropped her arms. "Things have changed. You are no longer allowed to come here when you please. Because, if I did have a husband in there waiting for me, he would not be incisive about arrival of a man from my past who only used me for a _fuck _every now and then every time he returned back to the States."

"Love," Ian wrapped his arms around Maura's waist. "This is not what you are. You're the love of my life." He kissed her to accent his point.

The kiss felt wrong. He had stubble where she wanted smoothness. He had big lips where she wanted thin lips. His lips were cold. She needed warm lips. He was the very opposite of Jane. It rushed to her like the crash of a wave. She drowned in the memory of the previous night. They kissed. But it wasn't just a kiss she'd shared with previous lovers. This kiss was more. It was their first kiss and she had been assured of just how Jane felt. The brunette insisted that it hadn't been the wine. Maura hadn't been sure of that but now she knew it was the wine. It was the wine that gave Jane the courage but it wasn't the wine that tainted her feelings. Jane was in love with her. Maura knew that. She had always known that. But, what she didn't know was that Jane Rizzoli only loved _her_. She knew it now. She understood it now. And that made kissing Ian so much harder.

By her direful fortune, a flash of lights pulled into her driveway. It was Jane. She knew it by the color and shape of the car. She couldn't see the brunette, but she knew very well Jane could see her. She pushed harder against Ian but he didn't budge.

"Ian, please." She said against his lips. She tried to pull herself away, only to stumble slightly. He caught her. "Please," She begged. Jane's car door slammed closed and Maura closed her eyes. She couldn't stand to see the damage.

The detective cleared her throat. "Maura." She had her hands in her coat pockets. "Ian."

Ian finally pulled away. "Jane." He didn't even look at her. His eyes were on Maura. While hers were still closed. "What are you doing here?" He looked at the detective.

"I was here for dinner." Jane shifted on her feet. "But since you're here, I'll just go."

"No. Jane." Maura pulled away from Ian's embrace. "Don't go."

"I see absolutely no reason to stay." She glared at Maura. The way Ian's arms wrapped around her. The way she let them wrap around her. Jane's lips quivered and Maura could see just how much this had been hurting her. To see him holding her in such a way.

But Jane's words hurt her just as much. "I see." She frowned.

"Yeah." The detective's face turned from pain to disgust. "I'll see you around, Maur." She backtracked back to her car. Maura would've worried about her falling if the detective hadn't looked like she had everything under control. Then she was gone. Just as soon as she'd arrived. Jane was gone.

"I need you to leave." She said to Ian as she turned to go back into her home. He started to say something. "_Now_." She closed the door in his face.

Jane sighed as she closed her office door. She didn't need the privacy, she just needed the conciliatory space. If she was going to cry, she needed to feel alone. Although she knew she was alone, she just needed to _feel_ it. She dropped down into her chair at her desk. She couldn't help but replay the sight of Ian's hands all over Maura. The way he kissed her. She'd kissed her like that but it hadn't been filled with lust. Her kiss had been fueled by the way she felt. It was clear Ian wanted one thing from her. She wasn't sure if she was more pissed that that's what he wanted or if that's what he was going to get. How did she get here? Three weeks ago, she would be in this very spot at her desk but her heart wouldn't be throbbing as profoundly in her chest. It was like Maura had reopened the wound then poured salt into it. The detective rolled her eyes at the file on her desk. She could open it. She wanted to open it but it wouldn't be the distraction she needed. She'd given her staff two weeks off. An impulsive decision she'd made because of Maura. Because she'd wanted to spend more time with the Medical Examiner.

She'd spent two hours at her office just staring off into space. That entire time she could've looked into possible cases. She could've spent her time doing something productive. When she'd passed the exit for Maura's house, she knew she should have gone back to explain herself. To apologize for overreacting. To apologize to Ian because it probably wasn't his fault. To apologize to Maura because it definitely wasn't her fault. Jane had waited too long. She was going to have to suffer the consequences. She just needed to apologize. But it'd been too late. Dinner was certainly over. Ian and Maura were probably crawled into bed now.

_Doing it is whatever they do at this time of night._ She glared and pressed her foot harder on the gas pedal. Ian touching Maura made her feel sick. It pissed her off, too. She needed to get home quickly before the poor innocent civilians suffered the wrath of her rage. Or the wrath of her heavy foot. There was a car in her driveway. She would've assumed it'd been Eve but she'd had a garage opener. Jane pulled up next to the car. Maura looked over to her from her own driver's seat. Her smile was apologetic.

"How long have you been sitting here?" Jane looked at her watch as she closed her car door.

"Two hours?" Maura closed her own door. They met at the first stair to the brunette's door. "I didn't know Ian would be there."

"No, it's fine." Jane shrugged as she looked down to her feet. She kicked the stair. "I overreacted."

"It was an appropriate reaction, Jane." Maura sighed. "I didn't kiss him back. It wasn't mutual."

"It's not like I have any claim on you." In true Rizzoli fashion, Jane laughed, softly. "I mean, he loves you. You love him."

"I don't." Maura stepped closer. "But I might as well, right? Because I'm getting nothing from you. Are you really this afraid of your feelings?"

Jane glared but she didn't look at her. "Is that what you think? That I'm _afraid of my feelings_?"

"Yes." The honey-blonde nodded. "But, how would I know any different? I have to put together clues. Things I pick up. Because you won't talk to me. You need a bottle of wine to even _try_ anything with me. I love you, Jane. You _have_ to know that. You have to. No one can go five years without speaking and just start things back up so soon like us. We have been snowballing since last night. You have to know how I feel about you. You neglected it for so long but how could you not know-"

"Because it never fucking made sense!" The detective snapped her head up. "Why? Why _me_? You could have Ian. You could have had Garrett fucking Fairfield. You could have had _someone_, Maura. Why would you choose me?"

"You don't think you're someone, Jane?" Maura's tone displayed how hurt she was. She was so in love with Jane and to hear that the detective thought of herself as nothing. "You _are_ someone. You are _everything_."

"I'm really not." Jane laughed. "I'm really just shit. I'm a killer. I'm a liar. I'm a thief."

"What have you lied about?"

"Told myself I didn't love you." The detective shoved her hands into her pockets. "I stole you. From anyone who could have loved you better than me. I mean, really, Maur? I couldn't even acknowledge my feelings for you. Who the fuck does that? I'm fucking shit."

"No, you're not." The Medical Examiner took each side of Jane's face. "You are so much more than that. You're everything to me, Jane. _Everything_. I've never met a more loving person. You walk around acting like you don't care for anyone but yourself but I can see through it, Jane. I know how much you care about your mother. How much you love your brothers. _All_ of your brothers. Vince and Barry, included. I can see that you love Eve. But, most of all, I can see that you love me. You are a loving person. You offer your help to anyone who needs it, Jane. As a career. You could have gone to a different profession. But you didn't. You're someone, Jane. You are so much more than you think of yourself."

The brunette licked her lips. "I can't." She frowned.

Maura dropped her hands. "Okay." She nodded. "But, I tried. I can't be the only one who puts a foot forward, Jane. That's not how this will work. I need you to try." The smaller woman turned and walked back to her car. Jane watched her leave. Her nose and ears were red and stung from the cold. When Maura was near her, she could easily ignore the cold. Because she didn't feel cold. But now, she felt even colder than she ever had in her life. And she couldn't will herself to move. She just stared at the retreating car in the distance.

* * *

**Author's Nose: Op, that's three chapters. I thought I could split it into four. I was going to but I decided I like long chapters. Do you hate me or love me? So, the saddest thing happened yesterday. I took my nephew (who was like a son to author Insomniac Jay) to Jay's house. I go there when I don't feel like dealing with my mother. My nephew climbed the stairs to his room and knocked on his door for five minutes. I was busy cleaning the living so he could play. When I heard him knocking on Jay's door, I ran up there. I tried to pick him up but he clung to the door. So I opened it to show him that Jay was gone and my nephew just cried. He's two but he knows who he wants. And he wanted is uncle. I couldn't help but cry with him.**

**On a lighter note, I wanted to let you all know that I don't have my laptop back. I'm using my sister's. Also, I'm getting a graduation present for myself. I want a new mp3 player. My iPod has broken three times this year and I can't get it replaced again. So, should I get a new iPod or should I go with an Android mp3 player? I hear those are kind of coolio. Idk, what's your opinion on Apple vs. Android? **

**One of the reviewers called you all Leasminions. I am so down for that term. So minions, don't forget to follow my new tumblr. SociallyAwkwardMaura. :) And go demand gay marriage rights. Go, right now!**

**145 reviews or I won't post another chapter. Gives me the perfect opportunity to actually use my Beta haha. And don't stop at 145, that is just mean. If I get to 145, you are more than welcome to review still. Because it's the polite thing to do. **

**Also, soon I'm going to be going through and correcting my spelling and punctual mistakes. But not today. Today I am cramping and flowing a red Niagara Falls. **


	17. Christmas Eve Is For Family and Violence

**Author's Nose: Because you guys have been so amazing and wonderful, I decided to share this chapter with you. But, sadly, I might not be able to update tomorrow or even on Friday. Because I'm babysitting tomorrow so I might not even get any writing done. If I do, I know I won't be able to post it until Friday. But if I don't get any writing down tomorrow, I'll most likely spend Friday writing. So, because you guys got me to 145 so easily, I'm going to give you this chapter. **

* * *

Jane knew she fucked up. She should have gone after Maura. She should have stopped the Medical Examiner from leaving in the first place. She should have done something but she couldn't. She'd been frozen in place. A feeling that was becoming all too familiar, quite fast. It was the next morning and Jane was absolutely beside herself. She'd been lying down on the couch, bouncing a small ball against the wall. She used her right hand to throw and catch it. It took a little more effort, considering she was left handed. Anything to distract herself from how completely fucking stupid she was.

_So, so completely fucking stupid. _The detective sighed and rolled her eyes at herself. She picked up her cell phone and dialed Maura's number. She preferred to dial it instead of going to her recent calls. Dialing it gave her a few extra seconds to think of what she'd say. But, every time she made the call, she'd just hang up on the second ring.

She dialed Maura's number once more. But this time she didn't hang up. Instead, the phone somehow glued itself to her face. The brunette glanced to Jo Friday and Sadie Monday. Both dogs appeared innocent. The call went to voicemail and Jane had to clear her suddenly, unbelievably clenched throat. "Maur," She croaked. "I'm sorry. Really sorry. Just...give me a call back." She frowned at all she had to offer. She didn't want to exactly pour her heart out over the voicemail. She didn't even know how much time she'd had on it.

The detective resumed throwing the ball against the wall. _You fight for her. J_ane frowned. _You fight for her until you have her for yourself. It's not going to be easy and it's probably not going to happen today or tomorrow. It might not happen until you're ninety years old. But you fucking fight for her. You know why? Because she's the only fucking person in this world that makes you feel something. You fight for her because if you don't, you'll never be happy again. You fight for her because without you, she has no one in this world who can and will love her like you do. You fucking fight, Jane. _Eve's words echoed in her head. Which made her feel even more guilty. She'd meant to fight. She wanted to but she just couldn't. She couldn't fight for Maura. She wasn't sure what she'd been more afraid of, being hurt or hurting Maura. No, that was easy. She was much more afraid to hurt Maura. She could handle her own pain but the pain she caused Maura, any pain caused to Maura from anyone, just absolutely fucking terrified Jane. She hated the thought of the Medical Examiner going through any pain.

"I'm not worth it." The detective told herself. "She deserves so much more than what I can offer." _You fight for her. _The shrill of her cell phone startled her. The detective wiped her eyes, although she knew it was impossible her caller could see her. It wasn't Maura. That much she'd been sure of. She just had a feeling it wouldn't be her. Hell, she wouldn't call herself if she'd been Maura. The honey-blonde should ignore her._ She _should _run in the opposite damn direction. _

"You're still coming, right?" Eve asked on the other end of the phone. "Because Avery and Ava are killing me. They're so excited to see Aunt Jane. Just forgot all about mom. Today is all about Aunt Jane. Why? Hmm, let me think. Maybe it's because Aunt Jane always comes baring gifts. Nevermind the fact that I bared the gift of life. But, you know. _Whatever._"

Jane laughed, lightly. "Maybe they don't like how naggy you are."

"Whatever." Eve repeated. "Please tell me you're not bailing on us. Everyone else is so excited to see you again. You're the life of our parties."

"Yeah," Jane bit back her tears.

"You okay?" The other woman asked, her voice becoming more solemn. "What happened?"

_I fucked up._ "Nothing." Jane quipped. "I'll be there in an hour."

"Okay." Eve wasn't entirely sure if she should believe Jane but she didn't have any reason not to. Whatever it was that was bothering her boss would still be bothering her when she arrived. That would give her a way better advantage.

The party had already started. It was a gathering before Christmas. One that Eve and Tony hosted every year. Jane didn't get to attend the parties every year but she had the first year she'd known them as a couple. Ever since then, she'd fallen in love with their kids. Eve and Tony's friends and family had taken a special interest in the detective. Jane wasn't the only gay friend Eve had and she was well aware of it.

"Thank God you're here." Tony was breathless. "They're extra rowdy today." He smiled, apologetically.

"No matter." She shrugged out of her snow covered coat. "I'll just tell them the story of how you and Eve met. That always bores them to death."

Tony mocked a laugh. "No killing our kids today."

"They're not kids," She could hear them running from the living room to her. "They're monsters until proven otherwise." She grinned and picked up Avery first. Avery and Ava Eve's four year old children from a previous marriage. Her husband had died the day of their birth. The only father they'd known was Tony. "Where's Eve?" She turned to Tony as Ava followed Jo and Sadie down the hall.

"The kitchen." Tony sighed. "Avery, honey. You have some chocolate on your face."

"Nuh uh," Avery frowned.

"Has mommy been secretly feeding you cookies?" He asked, despite her obvious distaste in his questions.

"No!" She hid her face in the crook of Jane's neck. Tony glared then smiled. Avery peeked then smiled back at him. "She said I could only have one."

"That's probably because she caught them climbing on each other to reach the jar." Jane sighed. "I'll be in the kitchen." The detective walked down the long hall until she reached the source of the delicious smell that traveled the home. "I found this kid. Is it yours?"

Eve had her face basically in the oven. She looked up. "Nope, not mine." She smiled, softly. "When you said an hour, you really meant an hour."

"Yeah," Jane sat Avery down on the counter. "I didn't have anything else to do."

"Wanna tell me why you were so gloomy over the phone?" The other woman still had her head in the oven.

"I think I fu-messed up." She censored her language for the child in front of her. Eve snapped her head at her in warning. "She invited me to dinner. And when I pulled up, Ian was there."

"Ian?" Eve closed the oven door and took the oven mitts off. "The guy who works in like Africa or something?"

"Or something." Jane made a face. "They were kissing. Well, she said he was kissing her. I overreacted and left." The detective sighed, sadly. "Anyways, she basically professed her love for me and I told her I couldn't."

The other woman was silent for a moment. Jane almost started to worry until she felt three blows to her left arm. "Jane, you stupid, doodoo head." Eve said between punches.

"Uh, ow!" Jane looked at her.

"Mommy, you said hitting was bad!" Avery claimed.

"Right now, and _only_ right now," Eve smirked. "Is it okay to hit _Aunt Janie_."

The little girl grinned and mimicked her mother with three punches to the detective's left arm. "Aunt Janie, you stupid doodoo head." She repeated.

"Ouch!" Jane made a face at the little girl. Feeling no actual threat, the little girl only smiled angelically. "What was that for?" Her question was for Eve.

"The woman basically declares her love for you and you tell her you can't?" The other woman shook her head, disapprovingly. "My God, Jane. I literally just want to punch you so hard."

"I need your help not your fists!" Jane rubbed her arm.

"I think my fists can help too." Eve grabbed a wooden spoon. She pushed a bowl into Jane's hands. "Stir." She dropped the spoon into the bowl. "Please tell me you've called her. Please?"

The detective laughed at herself. "Yeah," She smiled. "A lot. Fourteen times to be exact. But, I hung up thirteen of those times."

Eve fought the urge to punch her friend again. "Do you even remember our discussion yesterday? About fighting_ for_ her? Not _fighting_ her?"

"I remember." The brunette glanced to Avery. The young girl was distracted by a doll. "I don't know what to do. I love her."

"Do you love her like daddy loves mommy?" Avery asked, nonchalantly. "Daddy loves mommy a lot."

"Does he?" Eve smirked. "I didn't know this."

"Yeah," The young girl nodded. She turned to Jane. "So do you love her like daddy loves mommy? Cause daddy says he'd die for mommy and us."

Jane felt her heart clench. "Yes. I love her like your dad loves your mom."

"Mommy loves daddy." Avery said. Jane only looked at her, not fully comprehending the little girl's point. "Mommy loves daddy." She repeated as if her point made itself. She sighed, impatiently. "Mommy loves daddy. Daddy loves mommy. If you love her like daddy loves mommy then she loves you like mommy loves daddy."

"Are you sure she's not your kid?" Jane looked to Eve.

"Nah, she's mine." Eve gave her daughter a chocolate chip. "She makes a good point, though. Kind of sad, Jane. Not going to lie."

"I know, I know." Jane frowned. "I'm taking my advice from my abusive friend and her even more abusive daughter."

"Is she pretty?" Avery asked as she combed her doll's hair. "I bet she's pretty."

"She's beautiful." The detective smiled.

"Is she prettier than me?" The little girl asked, casually. As if she didn't want Jane to know that she wanted her to say no.

"You and Ava are the prettiest girls in the world." Jane smiled. Avery grinned, satisfied with that answer. "What do I do?" She asked Eve.

"Call her again." Eve stirred a pot of something that Jane couldn't quite see. "And call her again if she doesn't answer. Then again if she still doesn't answer. Then, you go to her. No matter what she says. If she says she's at work, you go there. If she says she's busy, you go anyway. You need to let her know that you're ready for whatever it is that you two want. But, you have to actually be ready Jane. And believe her when she says she loves you. Maura doesn't seem like the type of person to wait eight years to mess with someone's heart for the kicks and and lulz."

"The what?"

"The lulz." Eve repeated. "It's like lol. But, I don't know. Paul said it the other day. I had to have him explain it to me six times now I can't stop saying it. Not the point. You need to go to her. But not now. Because I need you to watch after these kids or they'll end up successfully robbing a bank."

"Monsters." Avery corrected from Jane's earlier point with Tony.

"What if it's too late, though?"

"Never too late." Eve shrugged. "Because you're going to keep fighting for her until your heart stops beating. Or hers. I don't know. Some romantic crap."

"I can be very persuasive." Avery stated. "I can tell her to forgive you for being a doodoo head. I do it all the time with mommy. Daddy's a doodoo head to her all the time. I just smile at her and she forgives him."

"Sharing my secrets, Ave?" Tony was at the threshold of the kitchen.

"Sorry, daddy." Avery smiled. "Aunt Janie needs help."

"What's the problem now?" Tony dipped his finger into the cake mix Jane had been stirring. She didn't know why the hell she'd been hand stirring it but she was sure it was to keep her hands busy while her mind worked. Eve was a genius that way. "You can't get rid of a friend from last night?"

"No." She glared at him.

"Is it that Maura chick?" He shrugged as he sucked his finger clean.

"Yes," She dipped her own finger in the mix. "_It's that Maura chick_."

"What did you do this time?" He picked up his daughter. "Did you shoot her biological grandpa?"

"Oh, that's just hilarious." She sat on the counter where Avery had just been. "Let's see if it'll be funny when you're on paperwork for a month."

"Sorry boss." He frowned. "I'll just take this one and replace her with your favorite."

"I'm her favorite." Avery protested.

"The one that cleans their room is her favorite." He argued with a smile.

She jumped from Tony's arms. "Gotta go clean my room! Sorry Aunt Janie!"

"You are fuckin' awful for doing that." Jane shook her head. "Using my love to get her to clean her room."

"Yeah, yeah." He kissed the back of wife's neck. "When's dinner going to be done?"

"I don't know." Eve smiled. "I need you to run to the store. I made a list of things we need. It's on the fridge."

He glanced over to the refrigerator then wrapped his arms around his wife. "How about we kick everyone out and make Jane take the girls? We could have a little party of our own."

"Okay, first of all." Jane interrupted. "_Ew._" She grimaced. "Second of all, that's just mean to say that right in front of me."

Tony smirked but ignored his boss. "No." Eve pulled away. "Go to the store and maybe we can have an after party."

Jane rolled her eyes. "God, you guys are like teenagers."

"Oh, yes Jane._ We_ are the teenagers." The other woman looked to her friend. "Even though you're the one who took eight years to tell the woman you love that you love her. And I bet you haven't even really told her yet."

"I've been meaning to." Jane defended, poorly. Eve laughed. "I'll get around to it."

"You'll do it tonight." The other woman leaned against the counter next to Jane. Both of them stared at the family portrait. "Or tomorrow. But you'll do it before the week is over."

"I've always wanted this." The detective frowned. When Eve only looked at her she shrugged. "A family. And family gatherings. Ever since I met Maura, I wanted it. I don't know why. Even when I didn't know it was her I wanted it with. Now I'm forty and single. I have to _fight_ for the woman I love. It's a bit pathetic."

"It's kind of romantic in a way." Jane looked at her flatly. "It just is, okay! I'm sure Shakespeare would have written something like this."

"Oh, please." Jane dismissed. "Shakespeare was nothing but a sexist pig. Who started a war of Yo Momma jokes."

Eve laughed then sighed. "You're in it shit deep, Jane."

The detective sighed too. "I know."

* * *

**Author's Hoes: See what I just did? Hehe. I really liked this chapter. I fell in love with Avery even though I created her. **

**So, yesterday I was Aunt Lea. Today, I am my nephew's mixed bred horse. He literally pushes me onto my stomach and climbs onto my back. Then he beats me if I don't start crawling around. He is Lucifer reborn. **

**I want to get to _at_ _least_ 155 reviews :) Go! Or you all will be my pure or mixed bred horses. And my nephew will ride. If you don't abide, he'll beat you with a shoe. Because that's what he did to me. **


	18. She Will Fight For You

**Author's Note: Thank you for your patience. Unfortunately, I'm in such a shit mood that I have no witty funny comments for you today. I've been in the hospital since last night. It's nothing serious. And it's most likely a virus going around but they're just keeping me under observation. Cool thing, though. I found out my spirit animal from going camping a from Friday to Sunday. I'm an owl. Now my family and friends have decided to call me Hedwig. Ha. Ha.**

* * *

"The voice of God, herself." Amanda, one of Eve's friends said. "She's still single?" Jane had been returning to the kitchen with some of the plates used by the rest of the guests. She stopped short of the door and pressed herself against the wall.

"She's off the market, Mandy." Eve warned, in the bitch tone that Jane had only heard a handful of times. "You've been known to sleep around."

"Have not." Amanda countered, quickly. "I just don't see a point in staying with one person. Humans were made to be non-monogamous."

"We were also made to evolve." Jane's friend argued. "According to the bible, we were made to follow God's rules. So far, we've done a piss poor job of that. Do. Not. Try. To. Sleep. With. My. Friend."

"But, she has the voice of God." Amanda groaned. "So sexy. If voices were people, she'd be a walking talking sexy son of a bitch." There was a pause. "Oh wait. She already is."

"She's off the market." Eve repeated.

"You said she's single."

"No." Eve sighed. "I said she's not in a relationship. But that's because she's a fucking idiot. Her heart belongs to someone else. So don't compromise it, please? Or I will fuck you up."

_God, I love her._ Jane took a step into the kitchen but the women weren't facing her so she cleared her throat. "Hi." She raised her eyebrows and smiled. Eve gave her a look. A worried look and Jane nodded. _Yeah, I know I was the hot topic of the conversation. _"Your daughters think I'm a mountain or something. They keep climbing me."

"Well, you _are_ incredibly tall." Amanda complimented. "So, so_ incredibly_ tall." Eve and Jane gave the woman a confused look. "They love you." She quipped as she took some of the dishes from Jane. "I think it's sweet how nice you are to them. I'm not so fond of them." Eve pinched her. "I'm just fucking kidding!"

Jane laughed. "They're a lot like their mother." The detective leaned her upper half against the counter onto her elbows. "Badass but they totally steal your heart."

"Kind of how I got Tony to fall in love with me." Eve smiled. "Have you called Maura?"

"No." Jane frowned. "I should. I will. I just have no idea what to say." She put her fingers to hear ear as a mock phone. "Uh, hi. You told me you're in love with me. You and everyone else in Boston knows I'm in love with you. I can't be with you because I'm probably the biggest fucking idiot on the face of the planet."

"At least you're starting with the truth." Eve smiled.

"Whatever," Jane sighed. "All I know is that I'll be lucky if she even picks up the fucking phone."

"Who exactly are we talking about?" Amanda cut in as she wiped off her hands.

Jane tried her best not to look at the woman's cleavage. It was a little difficult when the other woman stood directly in her line of view. "Maura Isles. Love of my life. But I'm a fucking jackass."

"Story of your life." Eve said from the refrigerator. "You've been in love with her for eight yours but you're an idiot. An idiot with their head of their ass."

"Completely up my ass." Jane drove her index finger into the air. "It's a little more complicated than that, though."

Eve scoffed. "It's really not." The other two women looked at her. "Don't let her try to tell you otherwise. She knows what she wants. What she wants told her straight to her face in bold face that she wants her too. But, what does she do? She fucking tells her 'she can't'. What type of idiotic ass shit is that?"

Jane glared. "She's _Maura._ If I fuck this up...if I hurt her..."

"Okay, you know what Jane?" Eve closed the refrigerator door. "I'm tired of you using that as an excuse. When I met Tony, he was in a relationship. He was engaged. I was a single mother of newborn twins. My husband, the man I thought to be the love of my life, died trying to get to the hospital. I had about fifteen different excuses not to be with Tony. But, I didn't use any of them. I knew what I was getting into. He knew what he was getting into. If we'd let our fear control our decisions, we wouldn't be here today. You wouldn't know us today. A lot of things could go wrong between us. He could cheat. I could cheat. One of us could die. But we're not going to just give up because we're fucking scared. That's just bullshit. We love each other. It's that fucking simple. We love each other. We're together. You two love each other. Be together. I'm sure she knows what she's getting into."

There was a silence. One that Jane, Amanda or even Eve herself knew how to break. Jane started to say something but her phone vibrated in her jeans pocket. She thanked the Lord.

It was Barry. She was going to kiss that man's head the next she saw him. "Rizzoli." Answering the phone that way had become apart of her. She didn't know any other way to answer it.

"Jane." His voice weak. Distraught. It immediately caught her attention.

"What's wrong?" She stood up straight. "What happened?"

"Jane," He tried again. "She...she's here."

"Who?" She demanded. "Who's there?"

"Maura." He groaned. "Kelly had Braxton Hicks contractions." The dark man took a deep breath. "We were leaving when they rushed her in."

"Where?" That was all she needed.

"Mass Gen." He told her. Jane checked her pockets for her keys. She didn't even bother to say anything to Eve as she left. Not because she'd been mad at her but because she just needed to get the hell out of there and to Maura as quickly as possible.

"Jane," Eve called after her. "What happened? What's going on?"

"Maura's in the hospital." Was all she could get out before the door shut behind her. Then there was the sound of her car and the screech of her tires.

* * *

The waiting room was full. The news must have spread rather quickly because a bunch of lab techs, officers, detectives, and even some of the other help filled the waiting room. Jane spotted her mother and Frankie first.

"What happened?" She demanded. She could hardly see straight. "What happened to her?"

"Car accident." Barry touched his old partner's shoulder. A simple gesture to tell her that he was there for her. "She looked pretty bad when I saw her. There was...there was blood everywhere, Jane."

"I need to see her," The detective turned to the nurse's station. "I need her to know. I need her to know that she has something to fight for. That I'm here. I'm not afraid, anymore."

"She's in surgery." Angela took her daughter's hand. "She knows it, Janie. She's fighting for you. She knows she has someone to come back to." She pulled Jane down into the seat next to her. The detective put her head into her hands. She rocked herself, refusing comfort from anyone else. No one else could make things better. No one but Maura. The last time she'd seen Maura, she told her she couldn't. But she never expressed what she couldn't do. She couldn't trust herself not to hurt Maura. But, she knew now that she'd hurt her more by not even trying. And now she was faced with the fact that she might not ever get the chance to try. Jane silently wept into her hands. No one touched her. Although it was clear they were all just as worried for her. They were all aware of what was going on between the Investigator and Medical Examiner. It wasn't something that one could ignore. They all knew that if Jane lost Maura, all hope was lost to ever see _Jane _as herself again. They would lose her. She would become an empty shell. Just a body without a soul.

_"Jane," Maura whispered. "Sweetie, open your eyes." The detective hadn't noticed that she'd fallen asleep. _

_ She groaned. "Maura?" She rubbed her eyes to get rid of the blur. "What are you doing out here? You're supposed to be in surgery or resting...or something." _

_ "Jane," Maura frowned. "I tried. It hurt. A lot. I tried for you." _

_ "What are you saying?" The detective looked around the waiting room. It was completely empty. Not even a nurse in sight. "What happened?" _

_ "I love you, Jane." Maura was in a white gown. She was barefoot. She looked as beautiful as ever. "I know that you've loved me all along. But, it's time that you let me go." _

_ "Go where?" The detective took Maura's hand as she stood. Then she saw it. She wondered how the hell she'd missed it before. Right where the entrance and exit had been, there was a light. Bright and welcoming. "No." It couldn't be. "No, you're not going. You have to fight harder, Maur. I know I'm selfish. I know I'm stubborn and difficult. I'm not much to fight for but please? Please? You can't leave me. I won't make it without you, Maur. Please? Please?" _

_ "It hurts, Jane." The other woman closed her eyes. "But in there, it won't hurt anymore. I'll wait for you. I thought you were foolish to believe in such a thing as an afterlife, Jane. But, I believe now. I love you." _

_ "You can't leave me!" She almost screamed. "Please, Maur? Please? No. Don't go." _

_ "I love you so much, Jane." Maura whispered into the brunette's ear. "It hurts so much." She let go of the brunette's hands. "I'll wait for you." _

_ "Please don't go." The brunette repeated in a whisper. She didn't want to watch Maura walk away. She squeezed her eyes closed. "Please don't go." _

It was the touch she'd felt on her knee and her shoulder that startled her awake. She looked around. It must have been late because the waiting room was emptier now. All that remained were some loyal lab techs, Jane's family, Vince's family, Barry's family, and Maura's family. But no one in any of those families had touched her.

"Where is she?" Jane demanded. "She can't leave me! Where is she?"

Angela was at her daughter's side now. She rubbed the detective's back. "The doctor came out," She said in a low voice. "Janie, she's going to be fine. She's going to be fine. She fought for you."

"She's okay." Eve rubbed the brunette's shoulder. "It's okay."

Jane settled back into her seat. She hadn't realized she'd been shaking. It wasn't because she was cold. She fucking scared. She really thought she'd lost Maura. "I had a dream," She whispered. "She left. I had a dream she left. I never got to be with her. I never got to...love her the way she deserves to be loved."

It took both women a moment to understand the meaning of Jane's words. "Honey," Angela wrapped both arms around her daughter. The detective sobbed quietly into the crook of her mother's neck. Tears stained Angela's shirt. Eve could only rub part of Jane's back every so often. Neither of them had realized when the detective had fallen asleep again.

_ Jane walked Maura to her car. It was snowing and she was thankful that she'd worn boots. She loved her heavy boots. They were meant for hiking but she just loved how heavy they made her feet feel. Jane always loved a challenge. The two women had their arms looped and Maura rested her head on Jane's shoulder as they walked. It was comfortable. It felt right. They fit. _

_ "Friday," Jane sighed. "You want to go to a crappy overpriced dinner so I can woo you?" _

_ Maura pretended to think for a moment. "Hmm," She touched her chin. "I suppose, since I have no other plans." _

_ Jane was cold. She didn't want to say anything because she didn't want to give up her time with Maura. "I hate to say this," She trapped Maura against the car. Both of her arms held the smaller woman. "Because I don't want us to be one of those couples that argue over who should hang up first or who's going to miss who more." _

_ "I'd win." The honey-blonde smirked. _

_ Jane glared then smiled. "Impossible." _Okay, it's already starting._ "Anyways, I kind of already miss you. I just got you, you know? And I miss you. Because I won't be able to see you again until tomorrow. I'm probably going to wake up first thing in the morning and drive over. Best Christmas present ever, by the way. But, yeah. I'd hate to be one of those couples." _

_ "You've yet to 'woo' me." Maura smiled. "And we're not a couple, yet." _

_ "We're a couple, Maur." The brunette stared at her. "Trust me. We have been since we became friends. We're a freaking couple." _

_ "We've seen other people, Jane." _

_ "So, we can't be trusted." The taller woman shrugged. "You're telling me I have to take you to dinner to get you into bed?"_

_ Maura bit her bottom lip and nodded. "More or less." _

_ "I guess a quick run to the drive-thru of Mickey D's is out of the question?" _

_ The Medical Examiner's laugh was soft. And visible by a cloud of air. Jane smiled. "Completely out of the question." _

_ "Fine." The detective pouted. "But, I better be getting laid Friday night. Or someone's going to be in big trouble." _

_ "I can't promise you anything." Maura swallowed. "I want to take things slow, Jane." _

_ "Slow meaning..."_

_ "We wait a little. We date a little." _

_ "You rhyme a little." The brunette interrupted. _

_ Maura pressed her palms to Jane's chest. "Only fools rush in, Jane. I want this to work. I want to do this the right way." _

_ "The right way." Jane sighed. "Fine. We can do this _the right way_. We can be like every other couple." _

_ "I wasn't giving you a choice, Jane." The honey-blonde smirked. _

_ "Ooh, feisty." The brunette purred. "Your way or the highway. I like it." _

_ There was a minute long silence. "Jane?" Maura's voice was quiet. She was unsure of herself._

_ The detective had been watching Maura's lips, intently. "Yeah?" _

_ "Kiss me." _

* * *

Jane opened her eyes. Her head rested on Eve's shoulder as the other woman typed away on her phone. It felt late. Or early. In Jane's case, it was late. She stretched then rubbed at her eyes. She looked to Eve, who'd put her phone away. She was ready to hold Jane if it came down to it.

"How is she?" The detective's voice was hoarse from sleep. She cleared her throat.

"You're allowed to see her." Eve tried to smile. "We've all been waiting for you to wake."

Jane glanced around the even emptier waiting room. It was on her family and Eve left, now. Her mother and Frankie had fallen asleep next to each other, using his sportcoat as a temporary blanket. "You should go come to your family." The detective rubbed her eyes again. There was a cup on the coffee table with coffee in it. Rather it was hers or not, she drank some of it.

"You _are_ my family, Jane." Eve smiled, genuinely. It didn't touch her ears, though. "Tony and the girls understand."

"How did you find me?" She didn't remember telling Eve which hospital Maura had been admitted to. She didn't have the time.

"Paul." The other woman laughed, quietly.

"Go home, Eve." Jane stood. "It's Christmas. I don't want you to spend a second away from your family longer than you have to."

"I'm not leaving you." Eve said from her seat. "There are things you need to do, Jane. There are things you need to say to Maura. And if you can't bring yourself to say them to her, I will be here. I'll be here for you to cry. If you can say them but things don't go as well, I will be here for you. But, if things do go well, then I will be here to congratulate you."

The brunette looked down at her friend. "Thank you."

"Go to her." The other woman smiled. This one didn't reach her ears, either.

Jane nodded. She walked to the nurse's station and tapped the counter, quietly. She looked back to Eve then to her family. This was her family. And they were incomplete. Maura was missing. Maura made her feel complete. Maura completed her family. "Can I see Maura Isles?"

"Yes." The nurse stood. "Down the hall to the left. She's not awake yet. She won't be for awhile. But if by some miracle she does wake, can you let a nurse or doctor know?"

"Yes." Jane nodded. She'd almost stopped listening as soon as the nurse had said yes. The young lady pressed a red button to open the doors. Jane glanced back to Eve. When her friend gave her an encouraging smile, she nodded.

Maura looked exactly like Maura. There weren't any bruises on her face to confuse Jane. She looked exactly like the woman Jane had fallen in love with. It wasn't until she'd lifted the blanket to find the honey-blonde's hand that she saw there was a cast around Maura's right arm. It wrapped around her hand all the way up to her shoulder. Only her fingers were free. There was also a cast around the honey-blonde's right leg.

"You might as well be in a freakin' body cast, Maur." She sighed. She knew those weren't the only injuries. There had been a surgery somewhere on the Medical Examiner's body. A surgery that had taken five hours. "You scared me. You really fucking scared me. What were you thinking? Maur, I know you're an excellent driver. You're the best at everything. Were you distracted?" The question made Jane drop her head. "You were probably distracted because of me." She touched the other woman's fingers. They looked bruised but not broken. "I'm so sorry, Maura." For the third time in twenty-four hours, Jane found herself weeping. Every time was for Maura. But, this time was different. She pressed Maura's fingers against her lips. This time she was where she needed to be.


	19. Protect Maura Isles

Jane hadn't left the hospital. Even when Maura's parents had insisted she went home to get rest.

"Trust me dear, you're going to need it." Constance touched her daughter's face. She looked to Jane, who seemed to be far more interested in Maura. "I'm afraid she won't be waking up for a while."

"She's not in a coma is she?" The detective's voice was quiet. She swallowed hard. "The doc came in and told me everything but to be honest none of it really made much sense. Maura would be the one to break things down for me."

"No, dear. She's not in a coma." Mrs. Isles smiled, sadly. "You should go home. At least get some rest."

"Ha," Jane ran her fingers through her hair. "I'm going crazy. I can't sleep. She's here. She's here and half of her body is in a cast. She broke her leg. Her arm. Two ribs. She had internal bleeding. I can't get some rest. I can't until she knows that I'm here. That I've been here. Waiting for her just like she's been waiting for me." Jane didn't care if she was giving away information Maura's mother hadn't known. She didn't care if Maura wouldn't want her mother to know about them. She just didn't care."

"Detective," Mr. Isles appeared at Constance's side. "You're still here." He seemed a little disappointed.

"Yes." Jane was irritated. These people, people who spent most of Maura's life _ignoring_ her, wanted_ her_ to leave. Granted, the detective was aware that she too had abandoned Maura, but she'd been there a hell of a lot more than them. There was a silence. Jane was comfortable with it. She idly stroked Maura's face.

"Janie," Frankie stepped into the room. "I need to talk to you."

She sighed. She couldn't decide between telling him to fuck off or...well that was it. She only wanted him and everyone else to fuck off. She looked to Maura one more time. "Okay." She nodded. The hall was quiet. There was a quiet buzz. "What is it?"

"This." He handed a note on red paper to Jane. "We checked for prints. There weren't any."

The detective opened the letter._ You've been warned._ The first few words stated. Jane clenched her jaw. _You've been warned, Dr. Isles. _"Fuck me. Where'd you find this, Frankie?"

"Ma went to get some things for Maura." Frankie watched his sister fold the letter and put into her back pocket. "She found it taped to the door."

"Are you investigating it?" She demanded. "Please tell me you're investigating it, Frankie. I can't think of anyone I trust."

"I can't, Janie." He sighed. "I'm homicide."

Jane rolled her eyes. "Frankie that's a load of fucking crap. She's the fucking Chief Medical Examiner."

"Janie, we've got BPD's best on this." He was patient with her. He understood. The best he could, at least.

"Jane," Constance was behind the detective. "There's something we should discuss."

"Look, Mrs. Isles," Jane sighed. "I'll go home when Maura tells me I should. But, as of right now, I'm not leaving her side."

"Jane," Constance tried again. "There's something Roland and I would like to show you." The older woman pulled out a stack of folded notes from her purse. "Since November, we've received a note almost every day. In our estate in New York."

Mr. Isles closed the door as he joined them. "We've had our best private investigators on the case."

"None of them are nearly as good as you." Constance admitted. "We didn't take them seriously at first but when we'd received a dozen photos of our daughter, we knew we had to get here to you. It has been difficult to get in touch with your office."

Jane looked at the photos and notes. "Why didn't you tell Maura about any of this? Or anyone from the Boston Police Department?"

"We are certain this has something to do with Patrick Doyle." Roland admitted as he wrapped his arm around his wife. "Maybe someone's the last to know that he was her biological father. Someone who wants to get revenge. We couldn't trust anyone but you, Detective. Our Maura has shared with us that you are aware of the situation."

_Of course I was aware, I shot her fucking father. _"Why didn't you tell her?" She couldn't help but stare at the photos. There were twelve of them. In all of them, Maura seemed to be unaware that she was being watched. She looked at the notes again. All of them were warnings to Maura's parents. Whoever had written them, intended for the notes to scare Mr. and Mrs. Isles into talking Maura into doing something. But, from what Jane could read, they were never specific in what they wanted Maura to do.

"We didn't want to worry her." Constance answered. "It is our job as her parents to protect her."

"Why didn't you come to me sooner?" Jane demanded. "I could have helped a hell of a lot sooner. Before things got this bad."

"We have realized our mistake, detective." Roland's voice was cautious. "But, we need you now. _She _needs you now."

"I'm going to need everything the other investigators have put together." She sighed. "Here's the fax number to my office. I want _everything_ faxed there."

"Thank you." Roland shook Jane's hand.

"Is Eve still here?" Jane quickly withdrew her hand and looked to Frankie. "I'm going to need her down at the office."

"No, she went home to change." The other Rizzoli sighed. Constance and Roland had already left. "What do you need her for?"

"Frankie, I need you to do something for me." She ran her tired fingers through her hair. "Stay here with her. If someone did this to her on purpose, which I guess it's obvious they did, I need you to stay here and protect her. Can you do that for me?"

"Yeah, of course." He nodded. "Where are you going?"

"I'm going to my office." She patted her pockets. When she felt her keys she looked to her brother. "If anything happens, you call me. Especially if she wakes up. I'll be here."

"You can trust me." Frankie promised. Jane nodded.

Barry was in the waiting room. Why he hadn't just gone back there to see Jane was beyond her. But, he looked worried. She only hoped he didn't have more bad news for her. She didn't know how much she could take from him. "They just told me." He tilted his chin to Maura's parents. "I want to help, Jane."

"What about Kelly?" The Investigator dug her keys out of her pocket. She didn't stop walking, either. "Shouldn't you be home with her? It's Christmas."

"Kelly doesn't like it but she understands," He followed. "Maura is important to me. To all of us. Not just the homicide unit, but all of us. BPD, your family, my family, Korsak's family. Whoever did this to her, will fucking pay."

Jane smiled, slightly. "That's what I like to hear, Snow White." She unlocked the car door for him.

* * *

Barry was more than fascinated by Jane's office. So much so that she was already regretting allowing him to help her.

"Jane," He wowed. "Your office looks like it belongs in some fucking Mark Wahlberg and Matt Damon movie."

"Thanks," She rolled her eyes. She threw him her set of keys. "Down the hall to the right is the copy room. In there, you'll find our fax machine. Check to see if Maura's parents' investigators faxed anything yet. I'll be in the conference room." She pointed. He nodded. Jane was tired. She was more than physically tired. She felt emotionally drained. She'd gone from worried sick about how to tell Maura how she felt to being worried sick about whether or not Maura would live. Now, she was worried how she would be able to protect Maura and do her job. The two seemed to be the same job, but they were completely different. Protecting Maura meant she had to stay always within five feet of the Medical Examiner. The only way she knew to protect Maura was to take her somewhere safe. But, doing her job meant she would stay days and nights in her office. Focused on the case.

Jane started her search on the recent cases Maura had testified in. She focused on the people the Medical Examiner had testified against. Men or women who belonged to mobs or gangs. She'd found eight articles in the last six months. She opened the first article.

"James Fergus." Barry read as he entered the conference room. "I remember that case. Frankie and I worked it."

"So, you know about it?" She took the papers from his hands.

"Yeah," He took the seat next to Jane. The table they sat it was round. It was glass. He could see her shaking leg. A nervous habit. "Fergus was involved in the murder of a sixteen year old boy. Gang initiation. Was about...five months ago? We all testified in it."

"We?"

"Korsak, Rizzoli, me, and the Doc." He shrugged. "Fergus wasn't too happy to see Maura there. She was able to tie him to the scene using his DNA."

"Gives him enough motive to want to hurt her." Jane didn't like the thought of anyone having motive to harm Maura. "What about Jackson Price?" She clicked the next tab.

Barry looked up to the LCD monitor. "That was Korsak's case. He'd be able to tell you more."

"You think you could get me the copies of all of the cases Maura has worked in the last year?"

"Yeah, let me make some calls." He pulled his cell phone out of his jeans pocket. "Cavanaugh normally wouldn't like us consulting with P.I. But since it's you, I bet he's going to have a field day."

Jane almost smiled. Almost. Instead, she read through the articles as Barry arranged for the cases to be faxed to Jane's office. "She told me she loves me." She admitted when he closed his phone. "The other night. We were supposed to have dinner but it was fucked up. She told me she loves me and you know what I said to her?" Barry shook his head. "I told her I can't." Jane sighed. "The last thing I said to her was I can't after the last thing she's said to me was how she feels about me. I'm such an asshole."

"You're not an asshole." He patted his old partner's shoulder. "You're just Jane Rizzoli. You'd rather suffer than put her through any sort of harm."

"But I should have just taken the fucking chance." She ran her fingers through her hair. "I should have taken the chance because I think I hurt her more by not being with her."

"You have that chance now, Jane." He smiled. "You have the chance to be with her now."

"That's if she'll have me."

"She will. I know she will." He grinned. Although most of it was forced. "She loves you. I've never seen her talk about anyone the way she talks about you. I've never seen her look at anyone the way she looks at you. She loves you, Jane. She will."

* * *

"I need you to tell me if any of these names sound familiar," Jane said to Constance and Roland. "Detective Frost and I have gone through every case Maura has consulted within this year, alone. The men on this list have belonged to mobs and gangs."

"Okay." Constance nodded, readily.

"James Fergus." She looked up from the list. When the Isles only shook their heads she sighed and looked at the next name. "De'Andre Jones." They shook their heads again. "Philip Baker."

Roland shook his head then paused. "Wait, I believe that does sound familiar. After we received the first warning, his prints were on the note. His alibi checked out. He'd been in Boston the entire weekend."

"But his prints were on the note?" Jane clarified.

"Yes." Mr. Isles nodded.

Jane nodded then thanked them both. She dialed Barry's number and walked away. "Frost," She said into her phone. "We got something. Philip Baker. His prints were found on the first note Maura's parents had received at their home in New York. But his alibi checked out. He'd been in Boston that weekend. Can you go through his file from their investigators to see what his alibi was?"

There was shuffling as Barry searched through the files. "Oh," He choked. "Yeah, his alibi definitely should check out. Says here, he was in court. You'll never guess who they used as a witness for the forensic evidence?"

Jane sighed. "Maura."

"Jane?" A nurse called.

The brunette turned. "Yeah?"

"Maura's asking for you." The nurse was short. So short that Jane had almost missed her.

"Okay," She said to the nurse. "Frost, I need you to go through that case. Look for anyone Baker could have gotten to deliver the note."

"Got it, boss."

Jane slid her phone into her pocket as she followed the nurse to Maura's room. She walked carefully. Nervously. Frankie stood outside of the door. He looked just as she'd remembered him. His arms behind his back. His feet apart. He was ready to protect Maura at any moment. She wanted to smile at her brother but as soon as she'd thought to, she saw Maura. The honey-blonde hair that she'd been stroking almost four hours ago was pulled into a low ponytail. Her bed had been only slightly elevated.

"Jane," Maura smiled.

The brunette couldn't help but return a smile. "Hey," Her voice was deliberately low. "How are you feeling?"

"They are controlling the pain." The honey-blonde informed. Jane was next to her now. "You look tired."

"I _am_ tired." The detective sighed. "Did Frankie take your statement?" She looked off. She wasn't ready to have this discussion with Maura yet. It wasn't because she was afraid. At this juncture, she wasn't afraid of anything other than physically losing Maura. It was because there was something more important now. Maura's life.

"Yes." The Medical Examiner nodded. She bit her lip. Jane stared off. Maura reached up to stroke the brunette's worry-stricken face. Her bruised fingers stroked the taller woman's cheeks. She felt how hot they were. Jane was blushing. "Say it." She encouraged.

"Say what?" Jane took Maura's fingers and wrapped her hands around them, carefully. She kept her head down.

"Whatever it is you're afraid to say." Maura licked her lips.

"I'm in love with you." _Might as well start with the easiest one, right?_ "And I'm stupid for letting you just walk away."

"You are." The honey-blonde nodded. She took Jane's other hand with her good hand. "But there's more. You are amazing at exhilarating signs of distress. Although you have been disciplined to stay calm in any conditions. You might not realize how easy it is to read you."

"Maybe you just know how to read me." Jane kissed Maura's good hand. "I need you to tell me what happened."

"What happened." Maura sighed as she relaxed onto the bed. "My parents were getting to me. It sounds so adolescent. I am almost embarrassed to admit it. The way they love each other. I wanted that to be us." The investigator ignored the pins in her chest. "I decided to go to the headquarters. Because of their early arrival, I deliberately ignored my job. So, I used it as the perfect excuse to get away from them. They'd felt guilty so they allowed me to leave." The Medical Examiner swallowed then closed her eyes. She was trying to remember what happened exactly. "I was a little distracted. I didn't think I was distracted enough to run myself off the road. There were two cars. One in front of me and one behind me. The red car – the car in front of me – was going decidedly slow. It was almost glacial. Or at least my impatience made it seem that way."

"Did you get a read on the license plate?" Jane asked, quietly.

"No." Maura peeked at Jane. When she decided the investigator was just freeing herself of the worry she'd felt for the last twenty-four hours, she decided to continue. "The black car – the car behind me – was going emphatically fast. Then...I don't remember anything else but just now."

"Did anything seem off?" The brunette asked. "About the cars or the other cars on the road?"

"Their speeds seemed measured." The honey-blonde sighed, tiredly. "That was the only odd thing. Otherwise, the accident appears to be have been my fault. I was distracted and impatient. I was upset."

"I'm sorry." Jane rested her head against Maura's cast, on the shoulder. "I've never been in a stable relationship. I'm forty and I've never been in a stable or functional relationship."

"The only stability I had was with you." The Medical Examiner whispered. "When we were close. I was in love with you and you were in love with me. It wasn't perfect but it worked."

"Then I had to go and fuck that up." The detective shrugged. "And I completely understand why you wouldn't want to be with me."

"Jane, my feelings haven't changed." Maura tucked Jane's hair behind her ear with her good hand. "I'm still in love with you. I'm only afraid. I'm afraid that you'll run again."

"Maur, I'm right here." The brunette sighed. "I'm right here. I've had about a million and one chances to leave. But I stayed."

"When things get difficult." Maura closed her eyes again. "I'm afraid you'll run when things get difficult again. It's something that you are very prone to, Jane."

"So, what now?" Jane swallowed hard. "We can't even try?"

""What I'm saying is," The honey-blonde rested her palms on Jane's chest. "I'm so afraid of being with you but I'm even more afraid of being without you. I can't live without you again, Jane. It's the most painful thing I have ever been through in my life. And I know that I can't go through it again. I'm afraid that if we try this and we began to fail, even the slightest, I'll lose you again. But, it's a risk I want to take. Because I can't just go back to being your best friend. It's impossible to love you the way I do and want you the way I do, and just be a friend. I am also not a fan of your night lovers." Jane scoffed then smiled. "I'm willing to do this. I'm willing to do this the wrong way, if it means that it works for us. I'm ready. But are you? Are you sure that you're ready for me? I've accepted you as you are. Stubborn. Selfless. Independent. I've accepted all of what I'll be dealing with. Have you?"

Jane thought for a moment. But she didn't have to think long because in her mind, Eve had just kicked her in the ass. _You fight for her. _"I'm scared. Yes. But, I'm ready. I'm ready to be with you." Those were the only words Maura needed to hear. She didn't wait long enough to hear anything else because she'd been afraid that the next ones weren't going to go in her favor. She crashed her lips against Jane's. Harder than she wanted to but that didn't matter now because she was in bliss. Their lips worked like the world's most fine clock. Multitasking was the easiest it'd ever been. Jane could run her hands discover Maura's body. Saving everything to her memory. She was getting to know the smaller woman's body while giving every ounce of love she had for the woman into their kiss.

Maura's good fingers stroked brunette hair. Then slid down Jane's torso. She'd only wished there hadn't been any fabric to ruin her her effort. Tongues were colliding, fighting for dominance. Jane would win. She knew it. Maura knew it. But they wouldn't be Jane and Maura if they didn't put up a fight. Maura moaned in the kiss. When Jane's lungs began to burn and her heart pounded so hard she was sure it'd explode in her chest, she pulled away. Only to place soft kisses everywhere she could reach. Maura's cheek. Her other cheek. Her nose. Her forehead. Then back down to her lips.

"Hey," She rested her forehead against the other woman's. "I love you."

The smaller woman smiled. Her eyes were closed. "I love you."

* * *

**Author's Nose: Did you all know that reviews make me happy? Well, you know now. It takes two seconds to tell me how terrible this story is. And is not me fishing for compliments. That is me just preparing myself. Kay now I'm going back to sleep. Review or I'll astral project in my sleep and fuck you up. **


	20. Jane Rizzoli Has Soldiers

Jane hadn't exactly been in a relationship in a long time. Especially one that involved a partner she actually cared a great deal about. This was all new to her. So, confusion was to be expected. A lot of confusion at that. But, when word had got out that the car accident Maura was in was deliberate, somehow the Medical Examiner had changed. That too was to be expected. But, Jane expected Maura to be more worried for her life. Instead, she was rude._ Rude_. _Maura Isles _was rude. And it wasn't that she was rude to her but it was that she was rude to everyone else. Especially Frankie.

"Jeez, Maur." Jane whistled as the younger Rizzoli left the room. "Ripping his guts out would have been less gruesome to watch."

Maura pinched the bridge of her nose. "There's a mess outside of my room. I'm supposed to relax. How can I relax with a mess right outside of my room?"

"A mess?" The detective peeked through the long curtain that provided privacy for the hospital room. All she could see were officers. Men and women ready to protect their Medical Examiner from any threat.

"A mess." Maura nodded. "A group of officers."

"Ah," Jane let the curtain snap back as she turned to face her partner. _Because calling her my girlfriend just sounds weird. _"Never knew that."

"Could you apologize to Frankie for me." The honey-blonde frowned. "I feel useless. I suppose I'm just projecting my emotions in the wrong way."

"S'okay." The brunette smiled. "He's used to it."

_She's too good to me. _"Did you bring it?" The Medical Examiner looked hopeful.

"Yup," Jane grinned. She reached into her bag and pulled out the oh-so-special lotion Maura asked her to pick up. "Cost me eighty freakin' bucks. This shit better work."

Maura willingly ignored the detective's foul language. "My skin is horrid." She pressed the back of her hand to Jane's cheek. "Feel that?"

_I'm definitely feelin' something. _"Uh," Jane coughed. "Yeah." She pulled away. She was thankful for Barry when he slid the glass door open.

He pulled the curtain back to it's original place as a provider of privacy. "Sorry I didn't knock." He shrugged, apologetically. "I found something." He gave the paper folder to Jane. "Turns out Baker used to work for Patrick Doyle. Five years ago." He glanced to Maura. She only nodded. "Doyle basically kicked him out of the mob and put a hit out on him. Remember that business meeting that went wrong?" He asked Maura and Jane. "When he...went to you?" He turned to Maura.

_He means when he had a man put a gun to my and Tommy's head. _"Yes." She nodded. She couldn't forget that night. It was the night she'd actually felt somewhat afraid to lose Patrick. It was the night she'd realized she actually cared about him. It was why she was so insistent on pushing him away. She was afraid of loving him. "I remember."

"Baker set him up." Jane said as she read the file. She looked at Barry.

"Yeah," Barry walked around to look at the file with Jane. "He worked for Evan Duffy. Doyle's rival."

"So, Baker's our guy." The brunette closed the file and placed it on the bed next to Maura's legs. "He was only charged with petty crimes. He's been in jail for about five years? He could have gotten an early release."

"I checked the prison, Jane." Barry frowned. He shoved his hands into his pockets. "Warden Price has kept a special eye on Baker. He hasn't left the prison in five years. Price is convinced Baker is intentionally trying to stay in there. The hit from Doyle is still out. Thomas Gunner, Doyle's main man, wants Baker dead. My guess is that he's too afraid to walk the streets of Boston."

"Wouldn't make sense to kill Maura." Jane frowned, stumped again. "That's just a suicide mission. But, obviously suicide missions are better than sex to this guy."

"No one ever said it had to make sense." Barry agreed. "We can go down to see him if you want." He checked his watch. "Price is all too thrilled to make up for the thing with Hoyt."

"Let's get down there." The investigator grabbed the file from Maura's hands. "You don't need to be worrying about this. Just lie here, look beautiful, and heal."

Maura frowned. "Jane, it's my life in danger. I have every reason to worry."

"I've got this." The brunette looked to Barry, who quickly looked away. Jane got down to eye level with Maura. "I'm going to protect you. I'm going to do my damn best to protect you. Don't worry, okay?"

"I'm still going to worry." The honey-blonde sighed. "But, I will try not to." She pulled Jane into a kiss. The brunette hesitated for a moment. Barry took the hint again and just left the room. "Are you embarrassed?"

The question caught Jane off guard. "What?" She pulled away, slightly. "No." Their lips were only an inch apart. Maura could feel Jane's words. "I just don't want him giving me shit about this later. "

"You don't want him to see you with your guard down." Maura smirked. "Glad to know I have that ability."

"You gonna kiss me or not?" Jane glared.

Maura nodded. The kiss was brief. Just enough for Jane to let Maura know she was going to be returning as soon as possible. "Be back in a jiffy." The detective kissed her partner's forehead. Although she knew Maura would be asleep when she returned.

"A jiffy is actually a measure of time." The Medical Examiner closed her eyes. "We've gone through at least a five hundred jiffy's since we've kissed."

"I'll be back soon." The detective corrected. "Get some rest, alright? Frankie and some uniforms are going to be right outside that door. You call for one of them if you need anything."

"Okay," Maura nodded, tiredly. She yawned. "I love you."

"I love you so, so much." The brunette smiled as she left the room. She left the door slightly open so the honey-blonde wouldn't have to use too much energy to call for help, should she need it. "Thanks for doing this, Frankie." She turned to her brother. "I know that I haven't been around so you don't owe me shit but thanks. For protecting her for me."

"She's like a sister to me, Janie." He smiled. "And she saved my life. I never got to properly thank her so this is me returning the favor."

"Still," She patted her brother's back. "Thanks." She wanted to say more but she decided against it.

"Doc's car is trashed," Barry said for small talk. "Saw some photos of it from Major Crash." He pointed to the backseat. Jane looked back and saw the file sitting in the back seat.

She opened it. It was understandable how Maura had obtained her injuries to her right side. The entire right side of the Prius was crushed inward. But the car also lied on its left side in the photos. She read some of the file. According to the firefighters and paramedics on scene, the only way they could get her out of what was left of the car was to remove the broken windshield and pull her through it.

"She's not going to be driving for a while, anyway." Jane shrugged to shake herself of need to cry for Maura. She had to remind herself that the honey-blonde was okay. Maura was okay.

Just as Barry had predicted, Warden Price was up for some ass kissing. "Detectives." He nodded to Jane and Barry. "Nice to see you again, Detective Rizzoli."

"Yeah," She looked around the entrance. The last time she'd been there, she was giving her statement to Vince. She told him the only reason she'd killed Charles Hoyt and the guard was to protect Maura. _Only_ to protect Maura. She didn't need any other reason. "Has anyone that Baker has been friends with been released?" She asked as she shoved her hands into her pockets.

"I've seen him with some inmates," Price waved off the guard manning the entrance. "But, none of them have been released just yet."

"Is it possible we talk to some of the guards?" Barry asked. "No offense but they're more aware of what's going on in this prison."

"The only people more aware of what's going on in this prison than me are the inmates, Detective Frost." Price took a deep breath. "But I guess for Dr. Isles, nothing is impossible. I _am _sorry, Rizzoli. I should have believed you about Hoyt."

"Yeah," Jane agreed. "You should have. But doesn't matter now, does it? It was _you_ that lost an inmate and a guard because you decided to put your feelings before your job. Bet there was a shit ton of paperwork for you." Jane wasn't entirely mad that Hoyt and his apprentice had gone after her. She wasn't entirely mad that Price didn't believe her. She was mad that Maura was put in harm's way.

"Can we see Baker now?" Barry asked. "We're sort of on a timer here."

Damn right we are. I need to get back to Maur as soon as possible. "Actually, to save time. How about you question Baker? I'll question some guards and inmates."

"Got it." Barry nodded. "Baker?" He turned to Price. The older man nodded and led the detective to the inmate.

Jane turned to the guard manning the entrance. "Hey," She scratched the back of her neck. "I bet you hear a lot around here."

"I do." The guard nodded. "But I ain't sayin' shit to you. You're not even a real detective anymore."

Jane expected his attitude. "You're mad because I killed one of your own. Even though he was crooked, you're mad that I killed him. That's what they teach you, right? You protect your own. No matter what they've done. He was your brother. But let me tell you something," She glanced to his nametag. "Briggs. Mason was sick. He wasn't here to protect or correct the inmates. He was here because somehow he managed not to become one. He was sadistic."

"What do you want to know?" Briggs asked, reluctantly.

"Does Philip Baker have connections with anyone on the outside?" The investigator moved closer to the guard.

"Yeah," He sighed. "He gets visits from a woman every other week. She's about your height. Red hair. Curvy."

Jane willed herself not to roll her eyes._ Leave it to a man to look at a woman as someone to have sex with. _"You get a name from her?"

"No." He pointed to the way Price led Barry. "But, if you go down there. You can check the visitor's list."

"What about in here?" Jane looked at the guard. "Is he friends with anyone in here?"

"He runs a gang in here. That I'm sure of." Briggs shook his head, shamefully. "We can't ever pin anything to him because he gets his members to do all of his dirty work."

"Any of them been released?"

"Only one." He thought for a moment. "Jason Rogers."

"Thanks." She tried to muster up a smile. She walked down the hall Briggs had pointed down. She glanced into the visitor's den. Barry and Baker sat across from each other. Whatever Baker was saying couldn't have been good. Barry looked irritated. Baker tilted his chin to the door. Barry turned his gaze to Jane then back to Baker. The investigator frowned then looked at the visitor list next to the door. There were fifteen pages of the two weeks attached to a clipboard. She knocked on the door then pointed to Price.

"What?" He closed the door behind him.

"I need copies of these."

"I don't owe you that much, Rizzoli." He folded his arms.

"Okay," She glared. "Then Detective _Frost_ needs copies of these. All from the last three months."

Price took in a breath then exhaled sharply. "Fine." He walked off. She returned her attention back to Baker and Barry.

* * *

**Author's Nose: I am in lesbians with all of you.**


	21. Insecurity and Sleep

Maura had no trouble sleeping. That is until Frankie entered the room. She slept lightly. Only because she'd been waiting for Jane to return. The younger Rizzoli was far more considerate than his sister. He was careful not to wake Maura but he didn't know that his entrance alone had already done that.

"You and Jane are very heavy-footed." She opened her eyes.

"Oh," He frowned. "Sorry." He looked down at his feet. "I was just checking up on you. You've been real quiet in here."

"I've been asleep." Maura smiled.

"Right." He internally chastised himself. "Sorry, I'm not good at this."

"Good at what?" She looked at him.

"Caring." He shrugged. "It's so much easier to just have small talk with you in the hall or make jokes at your dinner table. But, I'm not good at this caring thing. Guess it's why I married the force. Janie is so much easier at this than me."

"She isn't." The Medical Examiner fought the urge to laugh. It would be painful. "You are a lot more like your sister than you think." Or maybe that was what he hoped for. "She isn't good with opening her heart to others. It's been difficult fighting _my _way in there."

"She lets her guard down for you." He took the seat next to Maura's bed. "She's good with you. Because she loves you. I mean, I love you. But more like a sister. And I'm not even good at showing Janie how much I care about her."

"She knows, Frankie." The honey-blonde rested her head back. "Trust me, she knows."

"She's doing everything she can to find who's after you." He smiled. "She's trying to act like she has everything under control but she has no clue what the hell she's doing. She's scared shitless but she doesn't want everyone else to worry."

"Everyone else seems to already be worrying." Maura sighed. That was the problem.

"Because you've done so much for BPD." He admitted. "You mean a lot to us."

"Thank you." She forced a smile. "Have you heard anything from the Fatal Crash team?"

"The report just stated that the accident wasn't your fault." Frankie looked at the glass sliding door. He could see the nurses and other doctors maneuvering their way around the officers. "So it actually was intentional."

"That only terrifies me even more." The Medical Examiner covered her eyes with the curve of her arm. When she heard the door slide open, she only expected it to be Angela. While Jane had been away all day, the older woman kept Maura company. But it wasn't Angela. It was Eve.

"You're Frankie, right?" Eve looked at the younger Rizzoli. He nodded. "You and Jane look a lot alike."

"Thanks?" He freed the seat for her. "I'll...leave you two alone..." He glanced to Maura. The Medical Examiner nodded.

"Thanks." Eve flashed a smile. She watched him leave before she turned to Eve. "How are you feeling?"

"Tired." Maura looked to Jane's friend. "But at least I'm not in pain."

"That's...good." The brunette let her purse fall from her shoulder as she took the seat next to Maura's bed. "Jane loves you."

It was irrelevant but that didn't stop the Medical Examiner from smiling. "I know."

"Normally, my job is to comfort the victims or families and friends of victims." Eve looked at the cast on Maura's arm. "When I'm not running information past the investigators. Sometimes, when we work for big corporations, I have to control which statements we release to the media." Eve knew she wasn't making any sense to Maura. She inhaled, deeply. "But, most importantly, my job is to be there for Jane. I'm the only friend she has left. I haven't replaced you. No one could replace you. But, anyway. I guess I'm here to say that because you mean the world to Jane, you mean a lot to me. And I'm here for you. Even if we just sit here in silence. I'm here because it would make Jane happy and to be honest, I think it would make me happy."

"See, I never really had a lot of friends. Actually, that's a lie. I've had a ton of friends. But, I don't mean literally. Jane told me that you can be very literal. But, I've never really been as close to them as I am with Jane. She thought she'd lost you. And the thought of her going through pain like that frightens me. The only person I ever really cared about was myself. I wasn't self-centered. Not intentionally. I just couldn't connect with people easily. I didn't know how to love anyone else. Then I met my first husband. I loved him. Then I had my daughters. I loved them. Then I met my current husband. I love him. Then I met Jane. I love her. Those four people are my family. And, you know what? You're the love of Jane's life. You're apart of my family now too. I know it's sudden. I know it might be odd. But, I protect my family. Right now, the best way I know to protect you is to keep you from going crazy alone in here."

Maura smiled. "I would love your company, Eve."

"Good." Eve sighed in relief. "You're really good for Jane, you know. She tries to keep to herself and keep everyone else out. But you break down her walls so easily."

"It's a gift." The honey-blonde smiled, contentedly. "You're beneficial for her as well. She listens to you."

"Only because she knows I can kick her ass." The other woman laughed. "The news is all over your accident. The Boston Police Department has been good about keeping the fact that the accident was intentional to themselves. That's good, right?"

"I'm not sure," Maura yawned. "Are those your daughters?" She tilted her chin to the twin little girls outside of her room. One of the officers were talking to them.

"Yes." Eve smiled. "Jane has kept us out of the loop. Tony is trying to get all the information that he can to help. He's going to drop the girls off at my sister's. Then he's going back to the office to help Jane put together a profile. I'm going to stay here and keep you entertained." Maura's eyes were closed. Her mouth slightly agape. Eve quietly laughed. "Or watch you sleep."

It wasn't Christmas anymore. Maura was sure of it because it was dark outside her window. The clock on her heart monitor declared it to be midnight. Her bed had been moved into a bigger room. One that had space for others. Across the room, she saw Eve asleep on a couch. And Angela asleep on the recliner next to it. There was a letter on her pillow from her parents.

_You were asleep when we last visited. We'll be here bright and early in the morning._

Maura smiled then refolded the note. She wasn't tired. She missed Jane. The detective had promised to return as soon as possible. It'd been four hours since she'd last seen Jane. Maura sighed. She hadn't realized how reliant she was on her cell phone. She didn't have any other way of contacting Jane without waking one of the other women. So, she just waited. Waited for something to happen. Like one of the women waking up. Jane returning. A nurse coming in to check in on her. Only one of the three happened. Angela woke up.

"You're up." The older woman smiled from across the room. She glanced to Eve then back to Maura. She crossed the room to the Medical Examiner. "How are you feeling? Should I get a nurse?"

"No, I'm fine." Maura smiled. "A little pain never hurts."_ In any case, I want to be awake when Jane returns._

"Just like my Janie." Angela laughed, quietly. "She would suffer for days instead of admitting she was in pain."

"Did she mention what time she would return?" Maura asked, intentionally straying off the topic of pain. She didn't want to be reminded of her own.

Angela looked at the clock on the wall. "She should be here soon." And as if God had answered all of their prayers, there was an orchestra of heavy footsteps from down the hall. "I'm betting that's her." Maura grinned.

"Hey, you're awake." Jane whispered as she closed the door behind herself. She glanced to Eve. "Frankie says he'll take you guys home." She whispered to her mother. "Tony is taking his place."

"That Tony is such a sweet man." Angela smiled. "I only wished he had a divorced father."

"Really, Ma?" Jane looked at her mother flatly. "Now is the time you try to pick up men? Really? _Now?_"

Maura pinched Jane's arm. "Leave her alone."

"Thank you." Angela whispered before padding the carpet to Eve. "Sweetie," She whispered into the other woman's ear. "Eve." She said a little louder. There was a stir. "It's time to go." The young woman perched up. Stretched. Then nodded. She grabbed her shoes then followed Angela out of the hospital room. She threw a smile in Jane and Maura's direction.

"That couch is very short." Maura commented to break the silence.

Jane nodded. "It is." She played with her fingers. "I'm sorry it took me so long. We actually got a lot. Baker had an inmate friend that was released. Jason Rogers. He hasn't checked in with his parole officer in a month. Frost put out a BOLO for him."

"Does his car match the description of either cars in the accident?"

"No." Jane sighed. "But, that doesn't mean he didn't do it. Or wasn't apart of it. We'll catch this guy, Maur."

"I know you will." The honey-blonde smiled. She patted the spot next to her. "Sleep next to me."

"Nuh uh," The brunette laughed. "I sleep like a lion. I'm gonna hurt you."

"Actually," Maura grabbed the detective's hand and pulled. Jane took the hint and rid herself of her shoes and turned off the monitor which was the only source of light in the room. "Humans are very aware of their surroundings, even when they're asleep. By knowing that I'm here and that you could hurt me, you'll most likely stay on your side of the bed."

"You sold me." Jane smiled. She was on her side. It was the only way there was enough room for her. Maura shared the thin blanket with her. "Thanks." The detective scooted closer and rested her head on the Medical Examiner's shoulder. She could smell Maura's natural scent. Immediately, she felt tired enough to fall asleep. Five minutes ago, she'd been fine. She could have ran a marathon. Now, she only wanted to wrap her arms around her partner. But, she couldn't. She had to be careful with Maura. So, instead, she took the honey-blonde's good hand and laced their fingers together.

"You're falling asleep." Maura whispered after a few moments.

Jane breathed against the other woman's neck. "Yes. Isn't that what I'm supposed to do?"

"I'm not tired."

The brunette looked at the other woman. She was pouting. She smiled. _That is just too cute._ "Okay," She nodded. "Do you want to talk?"

"Perhaps we could discuss what we exactly are." Maura offered.

"Partners. Lovers. On a one way road to Happyland." The detective whispered, tiredly.

"Am I everything you've wanted Jane?" There was a hint of insecurity in the Medical Examiner's question. One that alarmed Jane awake.

"Everything I've ever wanted and more." She tried to see into Maura's eyes. It'd been too dark. "Why?"

"Eve said something that I could relate to, earlier." Maura winced from the pain in her ribs. Breathing was beginning to hurt. But, she'd wanted to talk to Jane. Because four hours apart felt like four days.

"You related to Eve?" Jane's laugh was breathy. It sent shivers up Maura's spine.

"Yes." The honey-blonde squeezed her eyes shut. "She said she had difficulty connecting to people. She'd never really loved anyone but herself because she didn't know how to love anyone else. I can relate to that. I just want to be enough for you, Jane."

The brunette placed soft kisses on the shoulder beneath her head. "You're more than I've ever asked for, Maur. I'm not just saying that because it sounds nice. I'm saying it because it's true." There was a silence. One that smothered Jane. "I've never said _those _words to anyone. Except for family. I've never told a man or a woman that I love them. I never even really said it to you. Platonic or not."

"I know." The Medical Examiner opened her eyes again. "It was never my intention to _push_. I just thought that...I just _thought_..." She sighed.

"You thought right." Jane smiled. "I _am_ in love with you." The words rolled off her tongue so easily, she decided to say them again. Although she'd said them earlier, it just felt _right_ to say them now. There wasn't any pressure. No possibility that they were the last words she'd ever say to the honey-blonde. "I am in love with you. I've never felt this way about anyone."

"Anna?" The doctor offered with a frown. _Maura, your insecurity is showing._ "You said you fell in love with her."

"I said I fell _a little bit_ in love with her." Jane whispered. "I'm over her. Way over her. I'm just thankful she showed me that it's possible to love a woman and not feel like I'm best friends with Satan." Maura was more than nonplussed by Jane's statement, but the close proximity felt so good, she was willing to let it go. Jane laced their fingers again. Her lips were only a few centimeters away from Maura's. Her light words tickled the honey-blonde's lips."I've been walking around with my head in my ass for eight years."

"That's a rather interesting way of describing it." Maura smiled. "I'd like to think you've just been afraid that I'll hurt you and you'll hurt me."

"That's included with the head in my ass part." Jane grinned.

There was another silence. Maura cleared her throat and it hurt. "When you touch me like this, I can't help but think that everything is going to be okay. Logic tells me that is impossible but I can't help but feel at ease in your arms."

_Taking a mental note of that._ "I'm not letting go." _I'm fighting for you._ "I will never let go. Not again."

"I can't be sure of that." There was sadness that slapped Jane in the face. She felt a hand in her chest that grabbed at her heart. She'd put that pain inside of Maura. She'd planted it when she left. Now, she had to deal with it. She had to aid it with her own. They would get through this. But the only way that was possible was if they got through it together.


	22. Even In Death, Doyle Is Up My Ass

It was early. Really early. The sun wasn't even up yet. But, Jane had never slept better. Although she was used to having her own bed and a lot more room to move, she'd never slept better because she'd slept with Maura. The best part was when she'd woken up and Maura was still asleep. She could just watch the love of her life sleep. And hopefully dream of a better universe where Jane could actually hold. But, she didn't get to watch Maura for long.

Frankie knocked on the door softly before opening it. "Good, you're awake." He sighed in relief. "Oh." He finally realized Jane was next to Maura. "Sorry...should I come back?"

"You're sick, Frankie." Jane rolled her eyes. "She's in the freakin' hospital." Jane was definitely not as considerate as Frankie. He whispered and she talked at her normal volume. When Maura began to stir, she paused. The honey-blonde settled. "What's this about?" She whispered to him at the foot of the bed.

"We got a hit on Rogers' car." The younger Rizzoli frowned. "It's not good. He was found dead in it, Janie."

"Shit." She looked to her partner then back to her brother. "Okay. What it look like? Suicide? Homicide? Accidentally shot himself in the dick? What?"

"Well," Frankie nodded to Maura. "We normally use _her _to determine that. Right now, Dr. Pike and Dr. Walsh are accessing the scene."

"They need two M.E.'s to access one scene?" She climbed out of the bed then put the side railing back up.

"No one compares to Maura." He handed her the file. "They say it's looking like a suicide but we can't be sure. I was hoping the Doc was awake so I could get her opinion."

"Maura doesn't have an opinion." Jane said casually as she read the first page. "Science is her opinion. And if she can't be physically there, then there isn't much she can tell you." There was another stir and both detectives paused. When Maura settled again, they resumed breathing. "See these marks on the body. These two marks behind his ear?"

"I don't see anything, Janie." He sighed. "I looked at those pictures a million times. I don't see anything."

"The lighting is causing a shadow, Frankie." Jane pointed. "But, there's definitely two small holes. Those are from a taser."

The younger detective took the photo from Jane's hands. He pulled it close and squinted. "Oh, there are two holes there."

"And the other Medical Examiners missed it." She frowned. "This is going to be hard as fuck."

"We'll get these guys, Janie." Frankie promised. "Especially with your help."

"Yeah." She only shrugged and turned back to Maura. "Bet you never realized just how good she is at her job."

"I have." He looked at the Medical Examiner. "Ever since you left, she hasn't been the same. She never makes an assumption. At least you got her to try or you could trick her into it. Now, _everything_ is science. She's still good at her job but it still sucks, you know? She's not the same woman."

"That's my doing," The detective shoved her hands into her pockets. "But, I'm going to make it up to her. I'm going to get her back to the human being she was before. I'm going to make things right again."

"Jane," Frankie frowned. "No one hates you for leaving. Even Maura. Even Ma. It hurt them but they understood. We all understood. That's why we let you leave. Not because we blamed you for Doyle. But because we knew you needed the time away. We just didn't think you'd be gone for so long. We thought it'd be one trip to Florida to go fishin' then you'd come back and Cav would just give you your job back just like that." He snapped his fingers. "But after months, we started to worry. When you didn't come back to us. When you didn't come back to Maura. But no one hates you. We are all proud of you. What you became. You could've gone either way and you chose the better path."

"Doesn't mean I didn't take a few steps down the other path." The brunette mumbled. "I did it, Frankie. I fucked a lot of women, Frankie. Just to forget about her." She looked at Maura, who still appeared to be asleep. "But I couldn't. But when I realized that not even Ma would still be proud of me as a person, I knew it was time to get my shit together. My company was shit at first. It was hard to even get anyone to hire me. My record at BPD helped. But, if it hadn't been for killing Patrick Doyle, I wouldn't have been where I am now. Literally. BiGon. The first company that hired me. They thought I was good because I was able to track down Patrick Doyle and kill him. So, I'm afraid that I am shit and I need to make everything up to her. I need to give her everything I've ever wanted to give to her. I need to make sure that she's happy every day for the rest of our lives."

Frankie patted his sister's shoulder. "Maura forgave you. I think it's time you forgive yourself. It's the only way this relationship will ever work out."

Jane swallowed hard and nodded. "I'm working on it. I really am." She looked at her brother's hand. "Call Frost. Let him know about the taser marks. Dr. Pike probably missed it."

"Okay." He left the room, quietly. Jane turned to Maura. She wasn't surprised to see the woman staring back at her.

"How long have you been listening?" She folded her arms and leaned against the wall adjacent to the bed. There was a lot of space between her and Maura.

"I heard him walk in." Maura tried to smile. It took too much energy so she let her face fall. "I tried not to listen. I tried to fall asleep again. At first, I didn't want to listen. But, then you began discussing me."

"And you couldn't help yourself."

"I _really _have forgiven you, Jane." The honey-blonde reached her good hand to Jane. The brunette walked around the bed to take it. "Frankie is right. It's time you forgive yourself or this really could end badly."

"And I _really_ am working on it." She pressed the Medical Examiner's fingers to her lips. "Every moment I'm near you, I feel like a better person."

"I bet you say that to all of the women." Maura smirked.

Jane pursed her lips. "Maybe," She laughed. "But I only mean it for you."

"How sweet." The honey-blonde pulled her hand back. "It's early. Come back to bed."

"I can't." The brunette frowned. "I need to get as much work into this case as possible. And I'm not tired."

"At least go home and shower, Jane." Maura took the detective's hand again. "You haven't changed since I was admitted."

"I'm sorry I've been a little distracted." Jane glared. She laid the sarcasm on, thickly.

"_Go home_ and change." The Medical Examiner pressed. "I'll still be here when you return."

"That doesn't make me feel any better." The detective sighed. "But I'll go home. Then I'm off to do my gumshoe thing."

"Kiss me before you leave." The honey-blonde bit her lip. "I'm not sure when I'll see you again."

"Maybe as some twisted first date we could have lunch? Here?" She looked around.

"Eating has been a hit or miss." Maura frowned. "But I encourage you to eat and I'll just watch."

"No, that's just creepy."

"And watching me sleep isn't?" She grooved an eyebrow.

Jane tried to glare but slipped up and smiled. "Guess you're right." She kissed Maura's hands. Even the bruised and half covered one. "Noon?"

"Noon." Maura confirmed.

Tony was still in the hall. He was barely conscious but he was still there. Jane frowned. She wasn't upset that he was falling asleep, she was upset that he could have been home with his family instead of helping her. "You should go home, Tony. I can get Frankie back here." Although the younger Rizzoli was now a detective, she would always see him as a uniform. That was what he was best at in her eyes. He was the only uniform she trusted Maura's life with.

"I'm good, boss." He rubbed his eyes. "I'm just not used to this anymore."

"That's because you're a father," She smiled. "You've learned to grab sleep when you can."

"I used to be one of the best detectives in Denver." He yawned. "Could stay awake for seventy-two hours at a time. All I needed was a twelve hour nap then I was ready to go again for another seventy-two hours."

"We have a lot of men on this." Jane touched his shoulder. "You don't have to prove yourself to me."

"But, I do." He looked up at her. "You don't think we're friends. You really only talk to Eve about everything. We've been working together for four years. That's longer than any of the other investigators we have. I think of you as family, Jane. I protect my family. Maura's my family now, too."

Jane felt warm in her chest. "Thanks, Tony." She rubbed her hands. "But really, you're no use to me half dead. Just go home and get some sleep. I'll have Frankie back over here."

"No." He stood up. "I just need some coffee."

"You need some_ sleep._" She pulled out her cell phone. "Besides, I'm going to need you at the office in a few hours. You're my best investigator. You think I'm going to have my best investigator standing around all day?"

Tony smiled. "You really think I'm your best?"

"Not better than me but close." Jane looked down at her phone. "Frankie," She put the phone to her ear. "I need you back here." It didn't take much to get a favor from the younger Rizzoli. She slid her phone back into her pocket and shrugged. "Wanna crash at my place?"

"That where you're headin'?"

Jane looked at Maura's door. "Yup." He nodded and she wrapped her arm around his shoulders. "Let's go you big girl. You really had me goin' with the family thing. Maybe next time you could not grow a vagina during your speech."

Tony mocked a laugh. "Yeah, I'll work on that."

* * *

It was like a regular work day. Like they were working a regular case. Except, they'd had a lot of consultants on the case. Vince, Barry, sometimes Frankie, and some of the other detectives from the great Boston Police Department. The conference room had never been so packed. There were boxes of old cases on the table and the detectives buzzed around trying to piece things together. Now they'd been faced with a bump in the road. One of their suspects was either murdered or killed himself.

"I found a credit card in Rogers' name." Paul said from the computer in the room. "Says he bought a plane ticket to the Middle East."

"Somewhere that doesn't care about what our government wants." Jane looked at the monitor. "So, if we told them that we have a fugitive over there, they'd just laugh and hang up in our face."

"Why would this guy kill himself?" He looked at his boss. "It doesn't make sense."

"It never does." She sighed. "My bet is he didn't kill himself. He was all set to leave. Baker must have ordered him to kill Maura and when he found out that the job wasn't done, he ordered a hit on Rogers. Rogers knew Baker would be after him so he booked a ticket somewhere he couldn't be found."

"But what is so important about Maura in this case?"

The realization hit Jane like a blow to the stomach. He didn't know. No one really knew. Not Tony. Not Paul. Not even Eve. They didn't know what connection Maura had to Baker. Patrick Doyle. They knew she'd killed Maura's biological father but they didn't know who he was. "Baker holds a grudge." She swallowed.

"It's a pretty heavy grudge." Paul shrugged. "I mean, to order a hit from jail? Just because she testified against him?"

"This guy is clearly an idiot." She clucked her tongue. "He's going after the Chief Medical Examiner of Boston. Clearly he doesn't think things through."

"Unless this is what he wants." Paul looked up to his boss. "Unless this is apart of his plan. You guys run around trying to find his disciples and he has something else planned. Something even bigger."

"Kid has a point." Kent stood next to Jane. "What if while we're all running around with our heads glued to each other's asses, he has someone planting a bomb in Mass Gen."

"Don't say shit like that." Jane warned.

"I just don't see why we're wasting our time for your girlfriend." Kent shrugged. "She has BPD behind her. Why are we involved?"

"Dude, Kent..." Paul warned.

"No." Jane shifted on her feet and looked at Detective Mavers. "Please, tell me more."

"I'm just saying, boss." He shrugged. "I could be in Jamaica with a pretty young thing by my side. Instead, I'm in Boston. I'm in Boston trying to figure out why someone would want to kill Dr. Isles. It's pretty obvious, isn't it?"

"Clearly not."

"Because of you." He laughed. "You obviously pissed someone off. And they're going after her."

"Mavers," Tony warned.

"She needs to hear it!" Kent snapped. "She has us working hard on the fucking Holidays. At least we could get fuckin' paid for it, right? You've been taking days off to go play nice with good ol' Dr. Isles. Someone saw you with her and now they're going after her. Why should we clean up your mess."

Jane nodded. "I think you should leave." She chose to go the professional route. As much as she wanted to tear him in half with her words as a sword, she didn't have time for Kent. "_Now._ I think you should leave now."

"Fine." He shrugged.

"Jane." Tony frowned. "Despite the way he said it, do you think maybe he's right? Maybe while we're working so hard that anyone could just stroll into Mass Gen?"

"Frankie's there." She sat down. "Frankie and a mess of officers."

"Obviously her home isn't safe." Tony looked at the note found on Maura's door. "Are her parents still there?"

"No." The brunette sighed. "They checked into a hotel near the hospital."

"Why is this guy after Maura?" Tony asked in a low voice. "It can't because she helped build a forensic case against him. No one is that fucking stupid. Well, then again he is. He did betray Patrick Doyle."

"Doyle." Jane exhaled. "Even in death this man is involved in almost every fucking case of mine." Tony only looked at her. "C'mere." She grabbed his arm and pulled him out of the conference room. She pulled him into her office and closed the door behind them. After checking to see if her cell phone and office phone were in use she turned to him. "Maura was adopted. By Mr. and Mrs. Isles."

"Kind of figured as much." He nodded. "She looks nothing like them."

"Yeah," Jane frowned. "Her father was Patrick Doyle."

"No." Tony's voice was disbelief. "She...she looks exactly like him." He stared at Jane. "But, she's nothing like him."

"Hence the adoption." She nodded. "She didn't grow up in Boston. She only came here for medical school and I guess she stayed."

"And you killed Patrick Doyle..."

"I did."

"Maura testified against one of Evan Duffy's men." Jane had never seen Tony so worried for a case. "What if Baker told him about Maura?"

"Which man did she testify against?"

"Thomas Gunner." He opened her office door to retrieve the file.

She followed. "That doesn't make sense. Gunner was Doyle's main man. He was going to take over the mob."

"No, in this file it says Gunner worked for Duffy." He slid it across the table.

Before opening it, she searched for Baker's file. "Look," She slid the other one to him. "It says Gunner worked for Patrick Doyle. He was the one that held a gun to my brother's head."

"Baker and Gunner both double-crossed Doyle."

"And he opened himself to these men." Jane shook her head. "They knew all about Maura. Gunner knows where she lives."

"Baker probably does too." Vince was next to Jane looking down at the file on the table. "Especially Doyle had someone watching her at all times. I bet he had Baker doing it."

"At any moment he could have killed her." The detective felt her stomach turn.

"Janie," Vince pointed to the file when the brunette had stopped reading it. "It gets worse."

"How?" How was that even possible."

"Look at Gunner's lawyer." He pointed again. Tony slid the other file across the table. "Now look at Baker's lawyer."

"Angelo Alvisio."

"Look at the handwriting." Vince sighed.

Jane looked at the handwriting in the two files. "Okay..."

"Now look at the handwriting from the note on Maura's door." They matched. Perfectly.


	23. Someone To Come Back To

Maura fought the urge to stretch as she woke up again. She looked around the room. Eve was sitting next to her bed with a magazine in her lap. Although, she'd been texting on her phone. She could see her parents talking to Frankie. She didn't even want to know what that conversation was about.

"Hey," Eve smiled. "You're awake." The Medical Examiner smiled. "Are you in pain? The doc's a little worried. You haven't asked for anything to control the pain."

She hadn't realized she was in pain until now. "Yes." She nodded. "Please."

"Alrighty," The other woman pressed the nurse's button. "I'll let your parents know you're awake." The honey-blonde could only nod and even that hurt.

"Maura, darling." Constance walked around to the Medical Examiner's good side. "How are you feeling?"

"Direful." The Medical Examiner winced.

"The detectives are working so hard for you." Roland took his daughter's hand. "You are very important to them." Maura smiled. "Especially detective Rizzoli."

"Yes," Constance agreed. "It seems as if she's running the entire investigation."

"Sound like Jane." Frankie said from the foot of the bed. "Even as a private investigator, she's still running BPD."

"I see the apple doesn't fall too far." Constance looked at Frankie. "Your mother is ordering the nurse's around."

Frankie laughed. "Yeah, I'll go tell her to stop." He looked at Maura. "Are you okay? Is there anything I can do?" She mustered up enough resistance to pain to shake her head once. "I'll be down the hall. Not too far away."

"I think I'm going to go get some coffee." Eve announced.

Constance stroked her daughter's hair. "We are so happy that you've found someone like her, Maura. We were a little worried that you wouldn't. But, we're glad that she makes you happy."

"She's a wonderful detective." Roland agreed as he stroked Maura's thumb. "A bit stubborn but she seems like a wonderful woman."

Maura tried not to laugh. "She...is...amazing." She closed her eyes.

The nurse entered on time. "Are you in pain?" She asked.

"Yes." The Medical Examiner nodded. Then regretted the movement.

"I'll take care of that." The younger woman smiled. "It shouldn't take any longer than five minutes. Unfortunately, it will make you drowsy."

"Thank you." Constance smiled. She looked down at her daughter. "I have complete faith in Jane. I believe she'll find the men responsible for this. We'll be right here when you wake, sweetheart." Maura only nodded. Because that was all she could focus on doing. The nurse wasn't kidding about the medicine working fast and making her drowsy. She glanced at the clock on the wall. It was almost noon. Jane would be there soon. To eat lunch with her. Maura felt a wave of guilt hit her before she fell asleep again.

* * *

"He's in the building, Jane." Vince's voice woke Maura. "He's here."

"Jane?" The Medical Examiner's throat was dry. She cleared it and tried again. "Jane?"

"I'm right here." The investigator took her hand. "Where is he?"

"Don't know." Vince was at the door, looking out the window. "Frost and Rizzoli are running the halls looking for him. A nurse spotted him. Said he had a gun with him."

"Shit." The brunette spat.

"What's going on?" Maura reached up to touch Jane's face. Jane looked so worried. A worry that etched her features. She almost didn't look like Jane.

"Angelo Alvisio." Jane watched the door. "The defense lawyer. He's apart of it."

"And he's here." The honey-blonde finished. "He's coming to finish what he started."

"He has to have a partner." Vince said from the door. "There were two cars. He has to have a partner. You think the partner's here?"

"His partner was Rogers." Jane leaned down and kissed Maura's forehead. She brushed the hair out of the way and pressed her lips against the cream-colored skin. "I'm going to protect you." She promised.

"I know." Maura forced a smile.

Jane let go and walked over to the door. "Frankie," She knocked on the window to get her brother's attention as he made his down the hall again. He stopped and looked at her. "C'mere."

Vince opened the door. "What?" Frankie was sweaty. He must have really been running the halls.

"Give me your gun." She held out her hand.

"What?" He looked to Vince then back to his sister. "You're crazy. I can't give you my gun."

"I don't care if you have to arrest me for killing Alvisio. Give me your gun."

He looked at Maura. Who had her eyes closed. She was trying to stay calm for Jane because it wouldn't do any of them any good if she freaked out. "Okay." He reached for his gun. "Don't shoot to kill. And you only shoot when you have to."

"I know." She nodded. "I've already made that mistake once." She checked for the safety then tucked it into the back of her jeans. "I have a plan." Both men gave her their full attention. "I'm going to walk down the hall to attract him. I have a feeling he's on this floor. This is the floor with the most security. The room next to us is empty. I'm going to walk into there. He might try to get into that room. If you see him, don't stop him. Let him follow me into there. Get Maura as far away from this floor as possible."

"You're using yourself as bait!" Frankie accused. "Absolutely not! He has a fuckin' gun, Janie!"

"I promised her I would protect her." Jane looked at Maura.

"No." Maura shook her head. "No, you are not allowed to put yourself in danger. There has to be another way. _Absolutely not_, _Jane._"

The brunette walked back to Maura. She stroked honey-blonde hair. "I know it sounds crazy. I know it sounds like a suicide. But, Maura. I promised to protect you. I promised I wouldn't let go. Do you think I will let him kill me? I'm coming back to you. I promise you that."

"Please, Jane." Maura begged. "Don't do this. There's another way."

"If this doesn't work, Maura. I'll listen to any other idea you have." Jane kissed the Medical Examiner's lips. She tasted salty tears. She wasn't sure if they belonged to Maura or if they were her own. "But, I can't let him get close to you. I can't. I have to try everything. By doing that, I have to try the risky stuff."

"Please." Maura squeeze her eyes shut. "You come back to me. You are not allowed to leave me. Not now."

"I will." The brunette promised. She pulled away then walked back to the door. As they opened the door, she tapped Tony's shoulder. He turned to her. She looked to her left then right. The room hall was full of officers. She quickly pushed him into the room with Maura. Vince and Frankie stayed near the door but not too close. Jane paced the long hall. She circled it four times before going into the room next to Maura's. It wasn't as she'd expected. There wasn't a commotion for her to hear. He didn't enter right behind her. But what she had expected was for him to enter. And he did. After fifteen minutes.

"Detective," Angelo smiled. He was dressed in a police uniform. That was how he managed to slip through the halls. She wondered if she'd walked right pass him without noticing. He looked around the room. "I should have known she wasn't in here." He looked disappointed but he didn't turn to leave. He only looked at Jane.

"What do you want from her?" The cold gun pressed against her skin as she moved around the room. It reminded her that she had to get back to Maura.

"If I tell you," He unsnapped the holster and pulled out the gun. He kept it low. "you'll just go and tell the others."

"Unless you kill me." She offered.

"You have a point there." He nodded. "If I kill you, I can walk right next to door to her. You only have one man protecting her. Tony, is it? He doesn't even have a gun on him." Angelo laughed. His Italian accent was thick. "Shoot you twice, shoot her once. Right in the head."

Jane clenched her jaw and ignored the wave of sickness in her stomach. She knew that Frankie and Vince were working on transporting her away from them. "You could do that." She agreed.

"You wanna know why I'm doing this?" He studied the gun. "I've never really held a gun before." He smiled. "Before, I only held one in court. Yesterday was the first time I held one to kill someone. I killed Rogers. But, you probably pieced this together. You're very good at what you do." He and Jane walked around one another like a dance. Every way he went, she went opposite. "This is the second time I'm going to hold it to kill someone."

"Me." She guessed.

"And Maura." He nodded. "See, Rogers came to me. Had a gun pressed to my head." He pressed the gun against his temple to demonstrate. "Said his boss wanted him to kill me. I asked him why. What I'd ever do to his boss. Apparently, his boss didn't like the case I put together to keep him out of prison."

"Baker."

"Yeah," Angelo smiled. "I was Baker's lawyer. Baker wants me dead. But, you know why? Because _Maura_," He spat her name and pointed the gun next door. "Had to stick her fucking nose where it didn't belong."

"What?" Jane looked from the gun to Angelo.

"It wasn't a fucking homicide case. There were no dead bodies. She's a fuckin' medical examiner. And she just waltz right into my damn courtroom tying Baker to the scene." It didn't make sense to Jane either but she learned a long time ago not to question why Maura did half the things she did. "Rogers said if we killed Maura that the hit out on me would disappear. He would look like a fuckin' hero to Baker. But he didn't fuckin' count on Doyle's men trying to protect her. After the media plastered the accident all over the news, Doyle's men came after us. Rogers was going to double-cross me. He was going to fuckin' kill me to keep me quiet."

"You're after Maura to protect yourself." Jane stepped closer to the door. "But, you'll never be safe, Alvisio. Doyle had a lot of dirty cops. If I figured it out, so will they."

"As long as I kill Maura, Baker won't kill me." He shrugged. "I can handle the dirty cops. They can't touch me if they don't know where I am. Baker's boss has people all over this country. I'll always be looking over my shoulder if he's after me."

"You should've just gone to the cops, Alvisio." Jane sighed.

"The cops?" Angelo laughed. "The cops? Do you know how many fucking dirty cops there are? If I'd gone to them, I would be dead right now. BPD can't protect anyone. They can't even protect one of their own." He shook his head and laughed. "You can kill me, Rizzoli. But, Maura still won't be safe. Baker knows that Doyle was her father. Baker knows it. And his boss knows it, too. You can kill me but that doesn't mean she'll be safe." Angelo pointed the gun in his hand to Jane. "They want her dead."

"Angelo," Jane swallowed. She knew she didn't have the time to reach for her own. The look in his eyes told her that he was going to pull the trigger. He had every intention of killing her. "You don't want to do this. BPD can protect you."

"No they can't." He cocked the gun back. "And I really don't want them to." Jane closed her eyes._ I love you, Maura. _But before she could take her last breath, all she smelled was gunpowder. She didn't even hear the gun go off. She felt a pain in her shoulder. Then she heard a thump. Angelo fell to the floor. Behind her, Frankie held up a gun. He'd shot Angelo through the window. The younger Rizzoli stared at his sister. The gun still in his hands.

Jane opened the door and went to him. "It's okay." She grabbed his hands and aimed the gun at the floor. "It's okay, Frankie." He dropped the gun into her hands. She looked at it then back into the room. Angelo was bleeding out. And quickly. There was a hesitant team of nurses and doctors rushing to help him.

One of them stopped and looked at Jane's shoulder. "The bullet grazed you." He pointed.

She looked down at her shoulder. "It's okay. I'm okay." She nodded to Angelo. "Go save him so he can spend the rest of his life in prison."

"Sorry," Frankie looked at Jane's shoulder. "You were standing in the way."

"I know." She frowned. "I was trying to trap him in there." There was a silence. "Thank you. A lot."

"You're my sister." He smiled. "Any time."

"Where's Maura?" She looked at the opened door of the room the Medical Examiner had been assigned to.

"Upstairs." Frankie pointed. "You should get your shoulder bandaged up first."

"It's not over, Frankie." Jane frowned. "It wasn't just Angelo that wanted her dead. Baker wants her dead. Baker and Duffy. Baker's calling hits from prison. And because Rogers failed to kill Alvisio and Alvisio failed to kill Maura, someone's just going to keep trying."

"But we know who's after her, Jane." He looked at Angelo. "We have a lot more than we did yesterday. I can talk Price into moving Baker."

"There's something that's been bothering me, though." Jane applied pressure to her shoulder. "He said that Maura stuck her nose where it didn't belong. Why would Maura help with the forensic evidence against Baker? She's the Medical Examiner." Frankie only shrugged. "Has Gunner been released yet?"

"No." He shook his head. "I checked earlier. Maura testified against him too. Should we have Price and guards keep an eye out on him?"

"No," Jane rubbed her shoulder. "Gunner and Baker don't know that we know everything yet. Let's keep it that way. Any unusual activity and they could call a hit."

"Can't trust the guards?"

"Not all of them." She took the gun from her pants. "But, I know for a fact that this is far from over. When he's stable, question Alvisio. Offer him a deal to get him talking. But, I want cops right outside Maura's door. If he knew where she was, then I'm sure Duffy's men do too."

"Where are you going?"

"The docks." She tucked the gun back into her jeans. "I'm going to have a talk with some of Doyle's men."

"Jane, you're going to need back-up." He warned.

"I'm taking Tony." She nodded as he exited the elevators. He caught his boss' glance and smiled.

"You okay?" He looked at her shoulder.

"I'm fine." She pushed the other gun into his hands. "You're comin' with me."

"Janie, this is a freakin' suicide mission." Frankie said in a low voice. "Doyle's men aren't exactly your biggest fans."

"No." She agreed. "But, they are _Maura's_ biggest fans."

"They're going to kill you."

"No they're not." She wasn't sure of that but she only hoped they would listen long enough before they pulled out their guns to shoot her. Tony was right behind her. "I want you to stay in the car." She told him. "If anything happens to me, you drive the fuck away, you got me?"

"No."

Jane stopped and turned around. "Excuse me?"

He squared his chest. "I'm not leaving you behind. If anything happens, I'm going down with you."

"You have a fuckin' wife and two kids to come back to."

"And you have Maura." He reminded.

She nodded. "Then let's both not die today." Tony agreed with a grunt as he tucked the gun into the back of his jeans and continued to walk to the car. Jane would have to remember that not only did she promise to protect Maura at all costs, but that she'd promised to come back to her. She patted the gun against her back then continued to walk the car as she shook some of the broken glass out of her hair. She had Maura to come back to._ I have Maura to come back to._

* * *

**Author's Nose: Look, I love you all sooo much I gave you FOUR FREAKIN CHAPTERS. My mood is a lot better because I'm going to a FUN concert. For those of you who don't know, Fun is the band that sings the song We Are Young. Which is one of the songs I use when I write. Anyways, because I'm so in lesbians with all of you, I gave you four chapters. Full of badass Rizzoli shit. So. Review? **

**I got some crap on Tumblr about why I don't write any sex between them. Okay, first off, they JUST got together. Half of Maura's body is broken. There isn't going to be any sex for a while. I'm no where near done with this story. And to be honest, I really just got it started. It wouldn't make sense to have them fucking right now. Sorry. If all you came to this story for was smut, then I suggest you go to another author. MJ Duncan is very good. They have a lot of one-shots with great smut. **

**Anyways, at least 200 reviews before I post another chapter. But don't just stop at 200. That would be cruel and I only like to be teased in the bedroom. ;)**

**Oh dear. **


	24. Making A Deal With The Devil

**Author's Nose: I know that I don't owe an explanation as to why I haven't updated but I figured I would give one, anyway. I've been busy with graduation stuff. Looking for another job and looking for a new place to live. And even worse, I've spent most of my weekend drunk. Now, I'm feeling the stupidity of my partying. I don't party. Ever. Like, seriously. Ever. I only did because it was the only way I could hang out with my best friend from high school. We're both going to different colleges. She's moving and yeah. I did stupid things. Like calling my ex over. Going to McDonald's at three in the morning to the only three people working that they were amazing. Going out and buying a Captain America costume and making my friend dress up in it just so I could make her strip out of it. I did stupid things. And I'm extremely hungover. Writing has been a hit or miss. But, I thank you all for your reviews. Especially those on The Pursuit Of The Naked Truth. **

**Also, how many of you would rather read a crossover between R&I and Bones or R&I and Grey's Anatomy with Calzona. Other suggestions are encouraged. As long as I actually know and like the characters. I'm going to start writing a crossover and I'd like your opinion. _You_ get to choose. Majority will rule.**

* * *

It was fucking freezing. Beyond any cold Jane had ever encountered. And she'd been to Canada last winter on a case. Maybe the only reason she was actually this cold was because the shock was wearing off. Jane was slowly becoming more aware with what she was doing. It didn't stop her or even scare her. She was just becoming aware of the stupidity of her choice. But, it was important. Because whether Jane liked them or not, she needed Doyle's men.

She glanced over to Tony, who seemed to be shaking out of his underwear. "You don't have to do this, Tony." She reminded him. She found herself reminding him every two minutes. Just hoping he would give in and get out of the car. She wanted the back-up but she wanted someone she didn't care about.

"No." He shook his head. "No man left behind. That's what they taught me in the Army. That's what they taught me in the Academy."

"Tony," She sighed. "You're not leaving me behind. In any case, I'm leaving you behind."

"Well, then you shouldn't leave any man behind, boss."

"What are you trying to prove to me?" Jane gripped the wheel. "Because I know you're good. It's why I hired you. It's why I promoted you. Tony, you have Eve and the girls to protect."

"You don't think I'm as good as you." Tony frowned. "You know that you're going to return to Maura. But I know you're not so sure about me. That's why you want to pull over and just let me out."

"I've been in these situations before." She pulled the car over. "I know what I'm walking into. These men, they loved Patrick. To some of them, he was like a father. The only father they knew of. And even though he did bad things, I don't think he was a bad man. He gave these men a home. Food. Money. Protection. That's why they're protecting Maura. Because they owe it to him. But, I took their father away from them. I took him away from them. They don't like me at all. They absolutely loathe me, Tony. I am about ninety percent sure as soon as they see me they're going to start shooting. But, I'm hoping that everything goes in my favor. I'm hoping for once, God is on my side. But, if it doesn't, I don't want you there. I don't want you to see me die. I don't want you to die. I just don't want so much for you, Tony. I'm trying to protect you. Someone is going to have to help protect Maura if I'm gone."

It took him a moment but he finally looked at her. "I'm going with you, boss."

Jane held back a sigh of frustration. "Fine." She got back on the road again. "Your death, man."

He grinned. "Bury me next to my Ma."

"Funny." She bit. The docks was empty. Cold, white, and empty. Her heavily tinted windows bought her some time.

"They're not here." Tony stated as he looked around.

"They're here." She nodded. "We just can't see them." She flashed the lights three times. "Switch seats with me."

"What?" He looked at his boss. "Why?"

"As soon as I get out, you'll see them." She unhooked her seat belt. "If something goes down, I want the car to be ready."

"You want me to drive away."

"No," She sighed. "I want the car to be ready. Just switch seats with me, Tony. That's an order. As your boss." He rolled his eyes but after Jane got out of the car, he climbed over the seat. She adjusted her shirt then closed the door. She turned to see a group of men exiting a warehouse. She only hoped they were the right men.

"Is you lost?" The tallest and darkest one asked.

Jane leaned against the back of her car. "No." She crossed her ankles. "I think I'm in the right place. Thought I'd stop by and see what was happening."

"That was a bad idea, Ma." He shook his head. "I could shoot you right now."

"You could." She nodded. "But what good would that do you?"

"A lot." One of the men stated. "You killed Doyle."

"You're protecting Maura Isles, right?" She lifted herself from the car. "Got men around her at all times, huh?"

"Fuck does it matter to you?"

"You haven't been doing your job." She gave a lopsided shrug. "And you're pissed because you were slacking. While you were doing whatever the fuck you were doing, someone got to her."

"We got that covered." Another man told her. "Don't worry."

"Rogers and Alvisio are only puppets." She told them. "I know exactly it is who you _want _to be after."

"So you can get us killed?" The leader, who Jane presumed to be Doyle's replacement or one of his lieutenants. "Nah." He nodded to the men beside him.

"They're going to get to her." She held her hands up. Two guns were pointed at her. One, she was sure was aimed at her head and the other aimed at her chest. Both or either shots would kill her. "I can help you. You can help me."

"I just want to kill you."

"I understand that." because you're not the first. "But think of how disappointed Doyle would be if you let his daughter die. If you failed him."

"Why would I want to help you?" He asked. "You killed Paddy. Why the fuck would I want you to live a second longer?"

"Because," She let her hands fall, slowly. Watching the two shooters, carefully. "One of the men who almost killed Maura...I know where he is. The other one is dead."

"Jones, she's fuckin' with us." One of the men in the far back warned. "Don't trust that bitch."

"You let them make your decisions?" Jane smirked. "Is that why Maura's in the hospital right now? Because you can't do your job? You let them make your decisions."

"She's bullshittin' you, boss." One of the shooters warned from the side of his mouth.

"I know where Maura is." Jane said, calmly. "I know exactly where she is. I know where Alvisio is. I'm your best bet, _Jones_."

Jones was quiet for a moment. He looked down at the ground then up to Jane. "We're not working together." He looked to one of the shooters. The men on the left lowered his gun, reluctantly. Jane could tell none of Jones' men trusted his judgments. If things didn't go as planned, she could use that against them. "Let's just say, I follow you back to where Alvisio is. I kill him. Then I have some of my boys follow you to Maura. They'll watch her. But whatever happens to you is out of my control. If they want to run you off the road tomorrow night, that's not on me."

"My life for Maura's." Jane was going to immediately say yes until she felt movement of the car. Then she heard the car door open and close. She closed her eyes and sighed, praying to God that Jones wouldn't think anything of it.

"No." Tony shook his head. "That's not going to work."

"Told you, boss." The shooter from the left shook his head. "That's five-oh."

"I'm not." Tony put his hands up in surrender. "I'm not the police."

"You tryna' cross me, Ma?" Jones directed his question to Jane.

She shook her head. "Back-up. He was my back-up."

"Don't he know he's supposed to stay his ass hidden or something?"

"He's...being a little brat right now." Jane sighed.

"You're not giving your life for Maura's." Tony looked at his boss. "So, I can be the one to tell her that the love of her life that she was with for like two days got killed trying to protect her? By getting these men involved. Boss, I respect you. I trust you. But I can't do this." He spoke in a low voice with his back to Doyle's men.

"Then Frankie will tell her." She shrugged. "You said yourself that you would give your life to protect Eve and the girls." Jane's voice was just as low. She peeked over his shoulder every few seconds.

"But I would rather spend the rest of my life with them." He stared at her. "The worst thing you can do is commit suicide by getting involved with these type of people. The very people you spent most of your adult life trying to protect Maura and everyone else from. You're going to die working with them. How do you think that'll make Maura feel?"

"I don't care about her feelings as long as she's alive."

"Look," Jones sighed. "I'd hate to interrupt this shit right here but I got a man to kill. So, can you fucking show me where Angelo is?"

"She's not going to do it." Tony turned around. He lowered his arms.

"Yes I will." Jane walked around him. "Let's go." Jane was about to turn around. She was about to go to show Jones and his men where to find Alvisio. She was going to tell them that Maura was somewhere in that building but she wasn't going to explicate where, exactly. She was going to go speak to Maura briefly. Tell her exactly how much she'd meant to her. Tell her that everything she was doing would work out in the long run. That she was more than positive that Frankie and Barry could protect her. That the Boston Police Department had her back. She was going to ask for forgiveness. Even though she knew that there was no hint of the possibility. At least not yet. She was going to do all of that. But before she could move, she felt something cold pressed against the back of her head.

It was a gun. "I can't let you go." Tony sighed. He wrapped his arm around her neck. More quickly than she would have even imagined. "I can't let them kill Alvisio" Jane found herself in this situation again. A man she thought good, to be evil. A man who swore his life to protect. Instead, he had a gun against her head and arm around her neck. But, she knew better than to look to Doyle's men for help. And it wasn't the betrayal that panicked her. It wasn't the fact there was a gun against her head. It wasn't her confusion about the entire situation thus far. No. This isn't what terrified her. What had her so distressed was that Tony was _here_. Tony was bad. Tony wasn't good. Then there was a good ass chance that Eve was just as bad. And Eve was at the hospital. With Maura.


	25. She Would Wrap Herself Around A Grenade

**Author's Nose: I'm sooo sorry you guys. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I shouldn't apologize but I'm on my period so everything is my fault right now. I decided that last night I was going to rewrite these chapters instead of waiting for my betas to get back to me on them. And I've been waiting longer than I am proud of. Having my stories in the hands of others is unsettling but whatever. I rewrote these last night and stayed up until one trying to go through them for errors. Keep in mind, my bed time nine. Any later than that, then I can't be accountable for my actions. So whatever errors are left, I'm sorry. You can call me out on them but I'm probably not going to care at this point. Because I'm being nice and publishing this. **

* * *

The hospital buzzed with activity. Maura could hear it from the other side of her door. But, the inside of her room was quiet. Barry and Vince watched the door. They were waiting for news. Any news. Was Jane alive? Was Jane dead? All they'd heard was a gunshot. One single gunshot. Now, the hospital buzzed with even more activity. Everyone else seemed to be panicked. It was obvious they were trying to save someone. Someone important. Maura knew better than to ask questions because she knew that they knew just about as much as her. Which was nothing. Jane ordered them to stay in the room with Maura. And every time they tried to get an officer's attention, they were told they didn't know much. Every time they tried to ask a nurse or doctor, they were told they didn't have time.

"The waiting is torturous." Maura sighed. Eve agreed with a small smile next to her. Another fifteen minutes of impatient hell went by then Frankie opened the door. He looked to Vince then Barry. Both men knew the look of concern. Maura was clueless. Her first assumption, and God help her she hated to assume, was that Jane had gotten herself killed.

"Maura." Frankie took his friend's hand.

"What happened?" She demanded.

He swallowed hard. "It's not over." He shook his head. "It's far from over."

"What happened?"

"She wanted to protect you."

The Medical Examiner closed her eyes, briefly. Then hazel eyes scanned the room, trying to piece his explanation together. Without drawing the worst case scenario. "The Jane I know, the protective Jane that I know, would wrap herself around an activated grenade to protect me." Frankie looked at her. "Please, tell me."

"I told her not to." He sighed. "I told her it was a fucking suicide mission. But, she didn't listen. She never fuckin' listens to me. Then she took _Tony_. She could have had me. But, she took Tony." He glanced at Eve, who seemed to be only slightly offended. But, even more worried. "She went to Doyle's men."

"W-why?" Maura quickly glanced from Frankie to the other men. Hoping one of them would be able to give her an answer. "Why would she do that? They will kill her!"

"She wanted to protect you."

_I would rather be dead!_ "Call her! Please!_ Call her!_" She begged.

"I've been trying to!" Frankie dropped his head. "She's not answering, Maura."

"That doesn't mean something went wrong." Vince stepped in. "She could just be busy."

"Or she could be dead." Eve said flatly. "She's so stupid. So, so stupid."

"Call Tony." Barry told Eve. "See if he'll answer."

There was a silence as Eve waited for Tony to pick it. "Nothing." She looked at her phone to see if she actually called him. "I can't believe he let her do something this stupid."

"I'm going to get her." Barry announced.

Doyle's men stood there watching. None of them moved. None of them stepped closer nor further away from Jane. She felt like a landmine. Any movement and someone could get seriously injured.

"I told you, Jane." Tony shook his head. "I protect my family."

She was quiet. Trying to remind herself that he was a bad guy. It was hard to grasp. "What are you getting out of it?"

"Protection." He shrugged. The gun nudged the back of the Investigator's head. "I can't let them kill my family. I'd rather you die."

"So, all that crap about Maura and I meaning a bunch to you." She rolled her eyes. Of course she'd fallen for it. The only two fucking people she opened her heart up to after Maura, stabbed her right in the back. She should have seen it coming. No one was that protective of a total stranger. No matter how much that stranger meant to their supposed loved one. Tony only nodded. "You're going to kill me."

"I might let Doyle's men do it first." He glanced to the men. They all just stared. "They're like starving Parana. They want you, _boss._"

"You think if you leave me here for them, your conscious will be clear?" She spat. "That doesn't make you a fucking hero in anyone's eyes. Avery and Ava are going to grow up thinking you're the best father in the world. How will you tell them I died, Tony? I know you won't tell them the truth. That you left me to die."

"I don't fucking care." Tony tightened his grip around her neck. "I protect my own, Jane. If that means I have to break some necks in the process, I'm okay with that. Don't fucking tell me you weren't coming here prepared to kill these men to save Maura."

She was stumped. He'd had a point. If it came down to it, she would have killed almost anyone to protect Maura. "Why are you doing this?" She glanced to Doyle's men again.

"Alvisio came to me." He shrugged. "Back at the hospital before your brother shot him. Said if he died, my girls would be dead. Some of Baker's men are with them. I can't take any risks, Jane. He asked me to join him. To help him. All I had to do was take care of you while he got to Maura."

_So, he hasn't always had a knife sharpened for my back. _"He's not going to be killing for a while, Tony."

"You think we're the only crooked people in Boston? It's not always black and white, Jane." Tony shook his head, impatiently. "If someone put a gun to one of those nurse's heads that work so fucking closely to Maura, I'm sure they would kill her. Baker has men all over Boston working for him."

"Damn Ma." Jones almost laughed. "How many people you pissed off?"

"Clearly many." Jane narrowed her eyes. She shook a little, trying to get out of the grip.

"Don't fucking try that shit, Jane!" Tony warned. "I'm not afraid to kill you!"

"How much you want for her?" Jones stepped closer, not caring if his life was at stake. "I want her. I want her dead and I want to do it myself. Slowly. Painfully."

"How much you got?"

"Got a Mil in the warehouse." He smiled. "With your name all over it, white boy."

"Five-oh!" One of the shooters yelled. He pointed his gun to the bridge across from them.

"Tenth. One hour, white boy!" Jones yelled as he and his men scattered. "Get the pigs off your ass first!" Tony could see the officer getting out of the car. It was Barry. He dragged Jane to the driver door before the detective could recognize them.

"Get in the fucking car!" He ordered. She climbed in and over the seat to the passenger seat. Tony pointed the gun in her direction but he could tell the cover had been blown. As soon as he started the car, shots were being fired at it. In the rear view mirror, he could see Barry. "Give me your gun." He ordered. Jane looked at him. "Give me your fucking gun or I'll blow your brains out!" She obeyed. He took it with his other hand and fired shots out of the driver window. When all they did was fire at one another but miss, Tony decided to just drive off. Hiding from the police wasn't easy. Especially with bullet holes decorating the car.

"Tony is bad!" Barry said into the phone as the officer he was with followed full speed behind Jane's black sedan. "He fucking fired at us! He has a gun to her head, Korsak!"

Vince looked at Maura. Then to Eve. "Stay on his six, Frost." He slid his phone into his pocket then looked to Frankie. The younger Rizzoli was holding Maura's hand. He had no idea what was going on with his sister. None of them did. But, Eve probably did.

"How long have you known Jane?" He asked Eve.

The brunette looked up from her cell phone. "About four years?" She guessed. "Why?"

"I think you know why, Eve." He stepped between her and Maura. "Wanna tell me why your husband has a gun pointed at her head?"

"What?" Came the response from all of the other people in room. "He wouldn't." Eve shook her head. "No, Tony is good. He's such a good man!"

"Are you working for Baker?" Frankie asked from Maura's side.

"Or are you working for Duffy?" Vince asked.

Eve stared at Vince. "I'm not working for anyone but Jane. I'm here for her." She looked at Maura.

"She trusted you." Maura spat out. "She trusted you with her life. _My life_. How could you?"

"I'm not dirty!" Eve almost yelled. "I'm not! I've known Jane for four years. There's no way I could have set this up when I spend most of my time with her."

"Frankie, go get a uniform." Korsak said, without looking away. "Tell them we've got another suspect."

"You don't want to do this." Eve said calmly. Her palms out. "Tony is good. There has to be something behind this."

"Greed." Vince stepped back to Maura. "You two get something out if it, right? Money. Maybe her company after she dies? It's worth millions. Were you going to kill the Doc too? Is that why you've been at her side, faithfully? Just waiting for the moment you were left alone with her? Baker gonna give you a bunch if you kill her? Is that what this is? A rat race to see who can kill Maura?"

"No!" Eve hissed. "It's not that. I'm here because she's my family. Jane is my family. And I'm trying to help her. I would never betray her. But, I can't let you just arrest me while my husband is in danger. Please, Vince. I'll stay over here. I'll answer any questions. Just,_ please?_"

The uniform stayed by the door. "You stay next to her, you hear me?" Vince ordered. "Keep your gun away from her."

"Yes, sir." The officer was new. Probably the only one available.

* * *

**Author's Nose: I need chocolate. Chocolate and reviews is what I crave for. Goddamn it, I have being a woman. **


	26. Too Stubborn To Be Saved

**Author's Nose: Tell me if you were able to see this as if it were a movie. Because I can but that's because I wrote it. And in my head it was actually a really beautiful scene. **

* * *

They'd ditched the car. Now they walked. Tony walked next to Jane with the gun in her lower back. To say she knew she was walking to her death, she was oddly calm.

"Does Eve know?" She asked, quietly.

He was silent for a moment but then shook his head. "No." He sighed. "She doesn't know."

"So, she's good?" There was hope. And Jane wanted to grasp onto it as quickly as possible.

"She's good." He nodded. "Most amazing woman I've ever met."

"So she doesn't know she's married to Lucifer?" The gun nudged further in her back but Jane only laughed. "I'm going to die anyway. I really don't care if you're the one to do it." She sighed, sadly.

"I'm not bad." He said, quietly.

"You're not." She looked down. "Just making a really bad decision."

"To you." He frowned. "To you it's a bad decision. Because you're going to die. But if it were you holding the gun to my head to save Maura, I know you'd believe you were making the best choice."

"She'll never forgive you for this."

"She doesn't have to." He shrugged. "I don't need her forgiveness as long as she's alive." The sun was setting. It was cold and there was snow everywhere. So, for a while, the only sound that was made was the sound of their slushy footsteps in the snow.

"She was so excited." Jane sighed. Tony only looked at her then back ahead. "The day I shot Doyle. When I was putting her wire on her. She was so excited to go undercover in that factory. She kept telling me not to worry. She'd said 'what could go wrong?' She had complete trust in me, you know? She completely trusted that I would protect her. She was so excited. I'd never seen her as excited as that before. Not about something that related to work and the possibility of her dying." Jane thought about that day. The way she held Maura to let her know how dangerous the situation was. The way Maura held her back to let her know she wasn't scared and she had complete faith in her team.

"I kept thinking, if I fuck this up. If he hurts her, I don't know what the fuck I'll do." She watched her feet. "She asked me 'what could go wrong?' and I didn't say anything because I didn't want her to know all of the things that could go wrong. But, out of all of those things, I never imagined this. I never imagined five years later, we'd still be paying for that one fucking mistake of letting her go in. She never expected we'd be going through this."

He didn't say anything. Jane didn't expect him to.

"Not everybody can be turned crooked when an arm is twisted behind their back, Tony." She took steady steps. "You and Eve were my family. When I thought my family didn't love me anymore. You were the closest people I had to family." She could see her breath. "I love you. I love you and Eve. And Ava. And Avery. And if someone told me in order to save Maura, I had to shoot one of you, I would shoot myself. I would ask you to save Maura and I would shoot myself. Because you were my family."

Jane could tell he was crying. Sobbing. But, he continued walking. His breaths were visible in clouds of air and the streetlights. He stayed just a few steps behind her. The gun still pressed to her back.

"You're a good man, Tony." She reminded him. "Just making a bad decision." It was the factory. That she'd killed Patrick. It was still unstable. But, the city couldn't afford to knock it down nor fix it up. So, they advised people to stay out of it. Jane looked up at the tall building.

"Where it all started." She quietly laughed to herself. Somewhere in there, had to be irony. If it hadn't been so sad, it would have been funny. Jane could feel her choked sobs coming on now but she wasn't going to cry when she died. Business still had to be done.

Jones and his men were already there. Waiting. Patiently like they had all the time in the world. But, this wasn't where they should be. They should be at Mass Gen.

"They're going to kill you." Jane said to Tony as he closed the factory door. "Baker's men. They don't make deals. They get you to do what they want then they kill you."

"What do you think this million is for?" He shrugged. "If by some chance, they let my girls go. This money's going straight to Eve and the kids. So they can run."

"You're going to let them kill you." She realized. "As a distraction for Eve. You're going to let them kill you."

"Bingo." He deadpanned. He cleared his throat to announce their arrival. Jones turned and smiled.

"Finally made it, white boy." He snapped his fingers. One of his men brought around a black dufflebag. "Since you're being so generous." He opened the bag. "Thought I'd be just as generous. Threw in another million."

"How courteous." Jane glared. "The gangster has heart."

"It's what Doyle would have wanted."

"He would have wanted you to protect his daughter."

"We're on that, Ma." His smile was sadistic but worn. As if it was his signature. He snapped his fingers again and the same that dropped the bag picked it up. "You give us her and we'll give you this." Jane felt her heart drop.

Tony looked at her then sighed. "Okay." He nudged her forward. But she fell to her knees. If they were going to kill her she wasn't going to be obedient. "Get up." He demanded. She dropped her head and closed her eyes. Someone was going to shoot her. Either way. "Jane, get up." His voice was more tender, but still rigorous.

"She's never going to forgive you." She told him. "And Baker _will _find her."

"White boy," Jones pointed. Tony turned. Baker stood behind him. Baker and some of his men. "We let you have Jane, you stop going after Maura."

"Boss' orders, Jones." Baker's smile was wickedly smug. There wasn't an ounce of good in him. Just business, pleasure, and evil. "Let us have Tony and Jane and I can give Doc a headstart."

"I'll go." Jane stood. "You can kill me. If you kill me, Maura will quit her job. Without me, she has nothing. You'll never have to worry about her again."

"She put too many of us away." Baker frowned. "Sorry, Rizzoli." But he wasn't.

"With Rizzoli out the picture, it'll be easier to kill the Doc." Jones said. Jane turned around to him. He was supposed to protect her. It was the only thing Doyle had wanted. He died trying to do it.

"I think you're playing me, Jones."

"Ay, man." He held up his hands. "I'm just tryna get something out of this."

"Safety." Baker offered. "Give me Maura and Jane and you won't have to worry about my men and even some of Duffy's men."

This seemed to be enough for Jones.

"You're supposed to protect her!" She screamed to Jones. He only ignored her. "They're going going to find Eve, Tony! They're going to kill her!" She dropped to her knees, and sobbed. This was happening too fast. She was losing too much control. She needed was for Maura to be protected.

"No one will ever find her." Tony took the dufflebag. "I'm sorry, Jane."

When she looked up, she saw something in his eyes. Something she'd never seen before. There were tears. But, they weren't tears of an evil man. A man about to leave his friend left for dead. They weren't tears of relief. A man about to get what he wanted. Protection for his family. They were tears of remorse.

"I love her." He dropped the bag in front of Jane. It was long and thick. Obviously properly used for traveling. Jane was perplexed. Until she saw Tony reaching for the gun in the waist of his jeans. The arm that was lowered at her was now stretched and pointing to Baker. "Tell her that."

She looked at the group of men. They were all now just reacting but Tony had already started shooting. She was piecing it together. He'd dropped the bag in front of so she could use it to protect herself as she ran away. It was heavy but she managed to lift it. Tony took a shot to the shoulder. His right arm dropped. He would never have to choose. He wanted her to save Eve just as she would have asked him to save Maura. Instead of having to choose between his families. He was going to save both. She ran. As fast as she could until she felt the cold wind sting her skin. She could see Tony. On the ground. The men stalking towards him to finish him off.

She couldn't. She couldn't leave him. There were sirens. Rushing towards her. Jane ran back into the warehouse. She picked up the gun Tony had dropped and shot Jones. The bullet entered his skull just between his eyes. He fell to his knees then dropped to the floor with a thud. She shot at Baker, but his back had been to her, along with the rest of his men, so the bullet on entered the side of his back. He pointed his gun at Tony and she dove in front of it. In front of Tony. As a shield to the bullet. She knew she about two or three bullets left.

The first bullet got Baker somewhere in the face. He dropped. But not before pulling his trigger. He got in her in the abdomen. She could hear footfalls in the distance and only hoped they made it to her in time. She pointed the gun and shot anyone she could. One bullet going through a man's chest to the man behind him and the other going to one guy's abdomen.

There were more gunshots. Jane could see Frost and some officers shooting at both sides. She had never been so happy to see that short little black man. She covered Tony with her entire body.

"What are you doing, Rizzoli?" He asked, weakly. "You're supposed to be running for the hills."

"No one gets left behind." Her own strength was waning.

"I love her." He said, mostly to himself. "She's my family. She gave me a family." His voice was weak.

"Shh,"

"Take care of them, boss."

"No." She shook her head. "They're _your _family. I'm gonna have my own family to take care of. You're going to take care of them, yourself. You're _not_ dying on me, Tony!"

His eyes shuddered.

"No!" She shook him. "You're not dying on me!"

"I betrayed you Boss." Tears fell from his eyes.

"You saved me."

He let out a strangled laugh. "Tried to. Too stubborn to be saved, Boss."

She laughed, but it truly sounded pathetic. "Guess I am."

"Paremedics aren't going to make it in time."

"Yes they will." Jane wasn't going to let him die. Even if it meant she had to recall every single memory of how Maura had saved Frankie down in the morgue after Bobby Marino. The injuries were different but she was sure she could still do it.

"Sorry Boss." Tony closed his eyes. The gunshots died down. Jane looked around. The only men that were still standing were the good guys. She almost smiled. Barry gave her a concerned look but she looked down at Tony. His chest hadn't been rising anymore.

Jane suspended her ear to his mouth. He wasn't breathing.

"No!" She screamed. "You're not dying on me!" She laced her fingers and pressed into his chest about an inch and a half. She repeated the motion for two minutes. "No!" She gave him two long breaths then checked for a rise in his chest. She began the procedure again.

"He's gone, Jane!" Barry tried to pull her off. "He's gone."

"No!" She pushed him away. "He can't be!" She could hear the ambulance getting closer. She continued performing CPR on him. And ignored the pain in her own abdomen. Tony needed to live. For Eve. For Ava. For Avery. Fuck, for her. He needed to live. She gave him two long breaths.

"He's gone, Janie." Barry pulled her off but she kicked and screamed until she was out of his hold. She ran back to Tony and started CPR all over again.

"He's not gone!" The only sounds now were the sounds of her pressing into his chest. "Not like this, Tony." She told him. "You're not leaving her like this!"

There were quick footfalls. "Out of the way!" The EMT's called.

"How long have you been performing CPR?"

"Four and a half minutes." She said without missing a beat.

One of the men began pulling out the AED.

They quickly tore at the fabric of his shirt, the buttons flew in six different directions, as she continued CPR. They put the pads on.

"Checking for pulse." The automated voice informed. "No pulse found. Shock advised." Jane looked at the paramedics. One of them pressed the shock button. "Providing shock. Please stand clear." Barry pulled her hands away. Tony's body jerked. "Checking for pulse." The automated voice informed again. Jane couldn't hold back the sobs. She'd gotten him into this. She'd allowed him to come. She'd allowed him into her life. She'd gotten all of them into this. She heard Tony's lifeless form jerk from the second shock. She couldn't will herself to look at him nor the paramedics. His blood was on her hands.


	27. Against My Advice

**A/N: It's short but...**

* * *

The hospital had a wind of gloominess that raced through it, a dark cloud full of despair and misery. She wondered if it'd been that way before or had she missed it because perhaps she was just happy to be alive? Maura watched Eve, and perhaps it was conspicuous. Perhaps it was guileful. She wasn't entirely sure how well her skills were, she wasn't very grand at being a detective. Which was why she'd gone into medicine instead.

"I'm not bad," Eve said again to Maura. She knew she was being watched, which answered Maura's earlier question. "Tony wouldn't do this unless he had a good reason. Maybe it was a part of their plan? Maybe going to Doyle's men and being captured by them was a part of some plan to keep Baker away from you?"

Maura didn't respond. Frankie slid the glass door opened and kept his head down as he closed it. He knew something, she was sure of it. "What's going on?" she asked. Her voice was hoarse. Her throat was dry and it hurt as if she'd spent the entire night screaming. Only it didn't matter. No amount of pain mattered.

"It's…." He turned to Eve. "Tony."

"What happened?" Eve stood abruptly, flouting the officer next to her and the gun he had pointed to her. "Is he okay? Where is he?"

"He…he wasn't bad."

"I know that! What happened?!" she crossed the room to him in only seconds and he took her by the shoulders because somehow the look in his eyes told her everything she needed to know. "He's dead." It wasn't a question. It was a proclamation. She stared him dead in the eyes, however the look was vacant. As soon as she'd realized it, it was as if she'd left her own body. Eve slunk to the floor. She was soundless. She was hollow.

Frankie crouched down with her. "He's not dead. He was shot in the chest. They're working on him."

The cloud behind her eyes slowly dissipated and she turned her gaze to him. It was still a little austere but he could see some comprehension. "Where is he?"

"They just brought him to surgery."

"What happened…exactly?" she took a deep breath, preparing herself. "I need to know."

"I don't know a lot of the details. There was a lot of gunfire back at the factory where Jane killed Doyle." They heard Maura's breath catch from the bed. She stayed silent. "Frost said it looked like a trade was being made instead Tony didn't keep his end of the bargain or maybe they just wanted him to deliver Jane and they were planning on killing him anyway."

"He saved me." Jane stood at the door. Eve's head snapped up. Tears spilled from her eyes when she saw her friend covered in blood. She knew it was Tony's. "I got out. I was supposed to stay out until Frost showed. I went back in. I don't know if his plan the entire time was to save me, Eve. I can't tell you if he betrayed me. I don't know. I don't feel betrayed. I feel like I owe him my life. And I need to protect you."

The smaller woman was in front of Jane now. "You let him go out there! You let him follow you out there because you knew he would! He thought he had so much to prove to you all because you couldn't fucking tell him he was a good investigator!" She was pushing Jane. She was punching her. She was crying and hitting and Jane didn't know what to do so she took the hits. "He…he looked up to you! Why'd you get him mixed up in this? We were just going to protect Maura! He wasn't supposed to be put in danger like that, Jane! Dammit you only think of yourself!"

"I know, Eve. I know. I only thought of one thing I didn't care. I should have gone alone." She took the punches and the pushes and the slaps to her face. She took them because she knew that Eve was right and right now she needed to hit someone. She understood. Only when Eve punched her in the stomach, it hurt. And she remembered she'd been shot.

"Alright, that's enough!" Frankie pulled the still swinging Eve away, also discerning the blood on Jane's shirt wasn't just Tony's.

"Jane, I think you've been shot." Maura said. She sat up in her bed and beckoned Jane over. The brunette glanced to Eve but walked over anyway. Frankie had her detained for now. Maura lifted her shirt and gasped when she saw the bullet wound. She turned Jane around. It'd gone through. "How did you get here without passing out from the pain?"

"I needed to see you." Jane said merely. And rather darkly. "And her." She nodded to the still hostile Eve. "I needed to explain it. I needed to-," she was cut short by darkness. It overtook her quickly; she hadn't even had a chance to distinguish was going on. Jane's body hit the floor with a lurid thump.

Maura listened, well attempted to, as Jane's trauma surgeon went over the procedure. However, it was hard to keep focus when she knew Jane would be okay. The bullet missed organs and had gone straight through. Of course, a surgeon, Maura knew Jane's odds were in her favor. That didn't mean she didn't still worry. It was what girlfriend's did. They worried.

"When can I see her?" she rasped.

"Well, she's still under the gas right now but we'll have her transferred in here as soon as she's awake." He smiled. It was a proud smile. He turned his face to hide it.

"Thank you." Maura said. She truly meant it.

"No problem. Now, I suggest you get some sleep. Your body needs rest to heal. If you want to get out of this bed any time soon, we'll need to know that your body can handle it." He pressed the morphine button for her. "We won't be able to know that unless you rest enough and stop stressing."

"Given the circumstances, I believe I'm allowed to stress at least a little." She yawned.

"You're right. Still, if you plan on ever not needing the morphine, gotta use up you dosage."

She nodded and closed her eyes.

* * *

Jane tasted cotton. Maybe not but it felt like there was cotton in her mouth. She opened her eyes and it took them a moment to acclimatize to the fluorescent lighting. The heart monitor was aggravating her so she removed the thick piece wrapped around her finger to measure her pulse. She noticed there was a button for the nurse so she pressed it.

It took a minute. "You're awake." Frankie was the first to show. She only noticed by his voice.

"Yeah," she pointed to the coffee in his hands. "Can I have some? My mouth is wicked dry here."

"I don't think you're allowed to have coffee, Janie." He frowned. "I'll get you some water."

As her brother left, the nurse came in. "Hey, how are you feeling?" The woman was tall and skinny. That was all Jane's eyes could see for now.

"I'm fine." She lied. She felt sore and exhausted. The last few days had finally caught up with her. However that didn't stop her from the job she had to do. "Where's Maura?"

"I'm sorry?" The nurse was writing something on the board next to Jane's bed.

"Dr. Isles?"

"She's been moved to a more secure part of the hospital." Jane nodded, satisfied for now.

"Can you?" She pointed to her IV. "I think I'm good on the drugs for now."

"Your body is under a tremendous amount of stress. It would be best if you just let the-,"

"No." The brunette shook her head. "Right now I have a gang war going on over my girlfriend. I want out of this damn bed right now."

"I'll have to get the doctor." She frowned.

"Then get the doctor." Jane sighed as she let her head fall back to the bed.

Frankie returned with a cup of water. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I steamrolled." She took a sip. "How's Tony?"

"They got the bullets out." He heard Jane sigh. "But he's not out of the woods yet, Janie. They have to go in and repair his heart."

"Remind me to thank my company's insurance provider."

"Noted."

"Eve?"

He shook his head. "She's really pissed at you. But, I heard her asking your doctor how you were so I think you're good. With time you'll fix it."

Jane nodded. "I gotta get out of here, Frankie. Killing Baker's and his men only made things worse. We're gonna get pinned for killing Jones and his boys."

"We'll figure it out, Janie."

"I hope so." She licked her lips. "We need to have Maura and her parents moved out of state. Tony too."

"There's a hospital in Seattle with an excellent cardiac surgeon."

She looked at him.

"Maura told me." He shrugged. "She says she could probably convince them to meet us halfway at a hospital. It gets Tony out but he doesn't have to travel so far."

"No, go to Seattle. The local PD owes me a favor for a case I solved. They'll protect Maura, her parents, Tony, and Eve."

"What about the kids?" he encouraged her to take another sip when it became difficult to understand her. "Where are they?"

"Eve says they're with her sister but Angelo told me Baker has men on them. I have to get them out."

"You can't do anything." He gestured to her in the bed. "I don't think Ma is going to let you go."

"Fuck," she sighed. "Ma."

"Yeah, so unless you've got some magic healing juice you been holdin' out on from humanity,-"

"No. Where is Ma?" she sat up. Frost leaned back as he thought.

"She's at BPD."

"Okay she's safe for now." She breathed then waited a moment. "We need to get her out too. Anyone Duffy can use to get to me or Tony. That means Tommy needs to go too. Tony has a brother in New York. Call him and I'll let NYPD know they need to have a few officers around him at all times."

"You don't trust our men, Janie?"

"With all due respect, it's a bunch of your men that got us in this shit to begin with."

He only shrugged.

The doctor knocked as he walked in. "I hear we have an Investigator that's awake."

"Yeah, cut the crap. I just want to get out of this damn bed."

"Jane," the doctor lifted her gown and pressed against her abdomen. "We can't just let you go."

"Sure you can." She rolled her eyes. "I'll leave AMA."

"I can't encourage you to leave against my advice."

"That's kind of why it's called AMA, doc." She cleared her throat. "Look, can you just let me out? I mean I'm not contagious with anything so if I leave I'm not harming anyone." She winced.

"Alright," he snapped his gloves off. "I'll have the paperwork delivered to you within the next twenty minutes."

"I'll be upstairs with Doctor Isles." She informed as the nurse removed her IV.

* * *

"No," Maura's voice was firm. "No, I'm not leaving you, Jane."

"Maur, I love you and I know this decision could make or break our relationship but you actually don't have a choice."

The honey-blonde scowled. "I think I get to decide where I go, Jane. I would prefer to go home."

"Y-you can't go home." Frost cut in. "There's been a break in."

"What?!" It was simultaneous between Jane and Maura.

"What the hell do you mean there's been a break-in?" the brunette continued. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I just found out a few hours ago. You were a little occupied, Jane." He frowned. "From what my buddy in Robbery told me, she basically doesn't have a home to go to. It would be easier if she just went to Seattle."

Despite the news, Jane gave Maura a pointed look.

"I'm not going."

"Maura you don't have a choice." Jane was tired of going around in circles. "My job is to protect you. I'm going to fucking protect you by sending you across the damn country away from all of this mess. If I knew that I was out there and you were in here vulnerable, I wouldn't be able to think straight." She took Maura's good hand. "I need you to do this for me. Please?"

She was silent in thought. There were very few times Jane begged her. Maura could still remember the last few times. When the brunette shot Patrick, Jane begged Maura to talk to her at the hospital. When Patrick was pronounced, Jane begged Maura to forgive her. Even when Maura had the bright idea to go undercover in the factory. Jane begged her to rethink the decision. Let her go instead. All of those times, Maura had gone against Jane's wishes. She couldn't help but think if she hadn't, if she'd listened to Jane, if she'd tried to forgive her, or even if she'd just let Jane go inside of the factory instead. They wouldn't be here. She wouldn't have dove into her work and worked other cases to forget about Jane, she wouldn't have been a target. Jane would still work for the Police Department. Patrick would still be alive. Their lives wouldn't be this dangerous. If she had just done what Jane asked.

So she nodded. It was slow at first then grew frantic. "I'll do it." She sighed. "I'll go."

A look of relief crossed Jane's face and she dropped her head to Maura's leg. "Thank you," she kissed her girlfriend's hip. "I'm going to keep you safe, Maura. I promise. I'm going to protect you."

"I know, Jane." Her fingers laced through Jane's hair. "I know you will."


	28. The Action of Protecting Someone

**A/N: This chapter may or may not contain major character ****_friendship_**** death.**

* * *

When Jane looked out the window the snow had turned to mush overnight. Puddles of it were stained the ground on every corner and then some. She wondered if she could convince Frankie to go home and get her boots. Unfortunately, Frankie or anyone else in the hospital aside from Maura had any idea where she lived exactly. Also, getting into her home wasn't going to be easy. She was not regretting the decision of pushing everyone out of her life for five years. She'd begun regretting that decision the moment she'd seen then in the bar. Their lives had gone on. They were still happy. It was only her that used drunken women every other night to make up for the pain she felt in her heart. She used those women to warm her empty, cold, and lonely bed for her and every morning she woke up unsatisfied.

Jane turned her eyes if not her attention back to Maura, whom had been dead to the world. She stroked the honey-blonde's good hand with one hand and her hair with the other. Most of all, she'd missed Maura. She hadn't known she could miss someone so much, even the little things. She missed the factoids that spewed from Maura's mouth like imprudent fire. Always giving information about things. Jane wouldn't admit it but some of those facts saved her ass on a case. Maura just didn't need to know that.

Jane hadn't noticed Frost and Frankie entering the room. She should have been alarmed, but if it hadn't been for the doubled security and more officers she'd thought could fit in a single hallway, she might have thought they were someone else. It was almost like going through security at the white house, she imagined. She would have to ask Maura when before she left.

"Find anything new?" she asked without looking up.

"Not really." Frost sighed. "Just the usual. Baker was definitely calling hits from prison but-,"

"How did Baker get out?" Jane asked, suddenly as if she'd caught onto an idea like a police dog with a smell. "I mean, we went to see him he was still comfortable in prison. How did he get out?"

"Price says he broke out." Frankie cut in, going over his notes. "Actually, when I asked him he seemed adamant on the idea."

"You think that's it?" She asked her brother.

He shrugged, genuinely unsure. "I think if Baker got out, he definitely didn't do it alone. One of his boys must have helped him-,"

"It would be very difficult to help someone get out of prison when you're on the outside." Frost murmured.

"True. So he had help on the inside." Jane bemused.

Frankie laughed. It was equal parts irony, disappointment, and infuriation. "Price has a habit of hiring crooked guards."

"You're telling me." The Investigator cracked her neck, not disagreeing with her brother one bit. "You think you can go back with a warrant for employee records?"

"Sure,"

"On it,"

"Actually I'm going to need one of you to stay." She winced at the word 'need' it was such a strong word. "Now that Tony is…" she looked at them pointedly. "Well you know. I'm a man short. I have a lot of my guys deciphering Maura's cases, trying to figure out if there's another party involved or if there is something we missed because I have a feeling."

They did a quick round of Rock-Paper-Scissors, and then Frankie proceeded back to the prison. She watched as he asked for one of the officers to join him. He was smart. Never go on an assignment alone. No matter how small it is.

"So what's this feeling you have?" Frost helped her to her feet.

She was tired, not old. "It's bothering me that Baker basically avoided going back to the streets for so long. He did what he could to stay in prison and then suddenly he wants to be out again?"

"Yeah, that is weird." He agreed. "You think there's other business he wants to take care of?"

"I think so. But if that business is Maura, I'm thinking there's more to it. I think either Maura is holding back on something or Baker thinks she knows more than she does."

"Maybe she's protecting someone." He suggested.

Jane's face was scrunched in thought, maybe even confusion. "I can't figure out who'd be this important to protect."

* * *

"I just want to stop here for a second, okay?" Jane whispered to Frost. "You can get the car warmed up or something."

"You sure?"

"I have to do this or I will never get the chance." He nodded and started to walk away. "Also, I need you to get a few officers from BPD to come with us. If there are men holding Eve's sister and kids' hostage we're gonna need some back-up."

"Got it." He walked away at a fast pace and Jane wondered if all of this was as important to him. Or did he want to just get it over with so he could go back to his wife. At that thought she dropped her head at her own stupidity. She was doing it all over again. If something happened to Frost, she'd never forgive herself. How could she even expect his wife to forgive her?

She took in a deep breath and it was shaky. She knocked once on Tony's door. Eve's head snapped up. Her eyes were red but she hadn't been crying for at least half an hour. She straightened her seat and cleared her throat.

"Just hear me out, okay?" Jane almost begged. "Please?" There it was.

"Fine." Eve's gaze turned back to Tony. She touched his face and once more Jane felt a wave of guilt hit her.

She sat across from Eve at Tony's side. She imagined that was where Avery and Ava would have been. Eve was completely clueless about the danger her girls were in. She thought it would be healthy if she didn't know. Her husband was still hanging on by a thread.

"I'm sorry." She said. She rubbed her hands on her jeans. "I was foolish to bring him along. I should have thought about the danger it would put him in."

"It's no different than all the other times you've put him in danger." She said with steel.

"I know. I do that a lot. I put those I love in harm's way and I don't think about how they could get hurt. I try not to, Eve you have to know I try. I mean we're all here because I didn't try hard enough with Maura. But, I can't stress how much I wish I could be here instead of him. Tony was-is a good friend."

"You know what hurts Jane?" she wasn't really asking. "When they saw Tony shooting, they questioned me. They questioned my loyalty to you. As if I've been an outsider to your circle of friends this entire time. I'm starting to see the way your family and friends see me, Jane. I was just the replacement. That's the way you see me too, isn't it." The hard look on her face dared Jane to lie.

So she nodded. "Sort of."

Eve let out a sigh. It wasn't of infuriation or relief. It was just a breath.

"You mean a lot to me, Eve. You and your family. You all are like my family. Without you I have no idea where I'd be. I don't know who I'd be."

"You used me."

"I didn't."

"But you did, Jane. You wanted someone you could make fun of like you do with Maura. Someone who could take your teasing. You wanted someone you could sit down and watch the game with and have a cold one along with it." She turned to Tony with a sad look. "You wanted someone who could help you figure out cases or take care of you. You used me to replace every single one of them and you know it. I had all of their qualities, Jane. You saw that when you hired me and you used me to get your old life back without just manning up and going to get it."

"Eve-,"

"No."

"Please just listen."

"No, Jane." She let out sob and it almost broke Jane's own heart. "My husband will probably die because of you. Because you were selfish. Because you don't think of anyone but yourself. Because you're just so goddamn stupid, Jane. I can't forgive you. I want to but I can't. When this is over I can't work for you. If Tony lives, I won't make that choice for him but just know I absolutely refuse to work for you ever again."

Jane wanted to tell her that Tony betrayed her. She wanted to tell Eve that for a few hours he wasn't the man she'd fallen in love with. But, he'd saved her life. So what he'd done didn't matter anymore. And the moment Jane got the girls back to Eve; she was going to stay as far out of their lives as possible. She was going to transport them to Seattle but what they did after that was completely their decisions.

"Okay." She stood. "I'll go."

Eve didn't say anything. She just poured herself over Tony.

Jane remembered. This had happened to her before. Eve had been here before. With her first husband. And it made her feel even worse. It made her feel so bad she wasn't going to allow Frost to come with her.

* * *

Frost was sitting in his cruiser when she got outside. He'd pulled it up to the entrance. She knocked on his window and he rolled it down.

"You wanna take your car instead?"

She bent down a little, using the frame to keep balance. The drugs were wearing off. "Nah, I have a sports car that's faster than your car and mind combined."

"Then what's the matter?"

"I need you to not be near me."

He gave her a confused look. Then it turned to worry. "What you can't trust me? You think I'm a bad cop? Did Eve say I was lying about Tony? I know what I saw Jane, he had a gun to your head and was shooting at me." His words became rushed.

"No, I trust you, Frost. It's me I don't trust." His looked even more confused. "Look, Maura is sitting in the hospital because I couldn't do my job. Tony is in the hospital because I couldn't do my job. I can't do that to you. I can't do that to Kelly. I need you to go home. Go spend time with your wife. This isn't fair to her at all."

"Jane she understands."

"I understand why Maura doesn't trust me but that doesn't mean I like it. That doesn't mean I'd rather have her trust me. Just because she understands all of this doesn't mean she wouldn't enjoy having you home instead."

She back away from the car. "Come on, Frost. You gotta go home."

"No." He opened the door and got out. "I can't do that."

"Why?"

"Because," he sucked air through his teeth and looked down the way. "I wasn't there for you before. I wasn't acting like your partner when I let everyone turn against you. I wasn't being your partner when I let you leave. I wasn't being your partner when I let you stay away for five damn years, Jane I'm not letting you do this alone. We all made mistakes back then and it's not fair that you're the only one having to fix yours."

She saw the guilt in his eyes and she didn't know how to resolve it. "I'm not alone." She gestured to the other officers behind them. "I'll have back-up. I'll be okay, Snow White."

His jaw clenched at her joke. She wasn't taking him seriously. "Jane you're not doing this without me." He spoke through his teeth.

She sighed. "Frost I'm saving your ass. I don't want you coming with me. I don't need you, alright? So go home and play house with your fucking wife. I don't have time to help you get over yourself."

He glared at her. "So suddenly I have to get over myself?"

"Yeah," she nodded. "And unfortunately not everything has to be about making you feel better about yourself. I'm doing you a goddamn favor so let me save your life and just go."

"Are you sure you're doing me a favor? Or are you trying to keep my blood off your hands?"

She felt her blood boil. She didn't even realize she had him pressed against his car and her fingers wrapped around the lapel of his coat. He only stared at her. His face was neutral. "I don't want you anywhere near this fucking case anymore. You understand me?"

He pushed her away and fixed his coat. "You got it, _boss_."

She watched him drive away and wondered if she'd just ruined a perfectly good friendship for nothing. Maybe he wouldn't have died. But, maybe he would have. It was a risk she wasn't willing to take.

"You ready to go, Rizzoli?" One of the officers asked.

"Yeah." She turned. "Yeah, I'm ready."

* * *

A/N: Do you think Eve is really never going to forgive Jane? Do you think Frost will realize what Jane is doing for him? Especially if she ruined their friendship just to protect him? Thanks for reading I always appreciate reviews but of course you guys don't have to. I was expecting at least a hallelujah or something. Also sorry for the short chapters. I got used to writing long ones on AO3.


	29. One Step Forward

Jane rubbed her palms and wondered if the pending rain could make her day any worse. She decided that anything from this moment on, her day couldn't be any more terrible. Only, she wouldn't dare say it aloud. That would just welcome tragedy through her front door. Instead, as she led the officers inside of her office, she walked with feigned confidence. She wasn't feeling what they hoped she would.

"Got anything on Nina's daycare?" She asked Paul. Luckily for them, Eve's sister Nina owned a daycare. It was their luck because inside of the daycare were Nina, the two little girls, and security cameras all around the building.

"Two Caucasian gunmen. I can't make out their faces but one walks with a limp and I think that could be from a torn ligament in his knee. We found that Baker hung out with someone like that in prison. The other one seems to be alpha dog of the two." He downed the rest of his coffee.

"But aside from that, all we know is that none of them have left the daycare yet." Paul gestured to the large LCD screen in the conference room. Jane gestured for the officers to take a seat. Until they knew what they were up against, they were going to be there for a while.

"Have they hurt her?" She asked, despite her attention being on Ava and Avery completely oblivious to the man holding a gun to their aunt's back. They were playing with building blocks while Nina knelt beside them. There was a look of guilt and fear on her face. Jane wondered if she thought this was her fault. If she'd done something to make these men come after her and just by her unfortunate luck, she happened to have her nieces in her care. She wondered how much Nina knew about the situation.

"What about her cell phone? She got it on her?"

Paul typed on his laptop then looked up to the screen. "It's in the building. It's not on her."

"Okay," Jane sighed. "Show me entrances and exits. Any possible way someone could get into there."

On another screen, a smaller screen, various boxes of various exits were displayed. There weren't many, but possibly enough to sneak someone in. "Can you show me the time her visitors showed up? I want to see how they got in."

She knew Paul couldn't pull up both things and analyze a strategy to get someone inside the building so she asked one of her investigators to do it instead.

As the video rewound, Jane was able to watch the men capture and threaten Nina. The entire time the little girls probably assumed they were just friends of hers. The brunette rubbed her hands again. "Okay, stop there." Her eyes were glued to the screen. "Go."

The men entered from the back door. As the alarm went off, Nina had run to the back to turn it off, separating her from the girls. Jane watched as they whispered something into her ear.

"Paul, do you think you can hack the alarm system?"

"I could try."

"If he's able to do that then we could possibly send a few people in." Jane hoped. "I don't want these men dead. If we interrogate them the right way, they will crack. They have to know something about Baker."

"I'm in." Paul stood. "I can turn off the alarm for ten minutes before the company notices and sends a cruiser by and possible call her."

"We don't want anyone to call her." Jane said. "Okay, I want two people coming inside with me. The rest are going to surround the building. I'm going to send the girls out first before Nina. Be on alert for them and keep them out of gunfire if there happens to be any. Got it?" She waited for a nod from every single officer.

* * *

The back of the building was wet from snow. There were puddles deep enough her ankles were soaked. In her ear she could hear Paul telling her that after he turned off the alarm, they only had at least ten minutes to be inconspicuous. After that, he wouldn't be able to manage to stop the company from sending someone and calling. Jane nodded and asked him to turn the alarm off.

Once on the inside, Jane was sure she could hear a penny drop and roll if it had. There were no movements and for a brief moment she wondered if their mission had been compromised. She moved slowly through the back, the two officers behind seemed to be trained in stealth. The voices they heard were young. They were innocent. They were oblivious.

"Is mommy okay?" Ava asked. She could tell because Avery was going through a stage and she pretended she didn't care about the well being of her parents because it seemed like something a big girl would do. Caring was for babies.

"Mommy is fine." Nina promised. Her voice didn't break a bit and Jane had newfound respect for the woman.

They came to the front section of the building. It was a large open section filled with toys and structures for the kids to occupy and be distracted by. The two gunmen had their backs turned, which made it easy. She just needed a distraction so they wouldn't shoot anyone point blank.

In the passage way had been two large hampers on each side. They knelt behind them.

One of the officers backtracked to the back of the building again and made a large sound with what Jane could never know. It sounded like glass breaking and metal colliding. She sent kudos his way.

One of the gunmen turned. "What the hell was that?!"

"I-I don't know." Nina stood.

"No sudden movements!" The man with the gun pointed to her instructed. He looked to his partner as if the man was stupid. "Are you going to go check it out?"

The shorter man looked hesitant as if he knew he was possibly walking to his dead. He drew his gun up and walked right past Jane.

She heard a commotion then a body dropping to the floor.

"Alright let's go." The other gunmen decided.

"Where?"

"We're getting out of here." He grabbed a back and shouldered it.

Once the door was unlocked Jane stood and pointed her gun to the man. "I don't think so."

"Who the fuck is you?"

"You said a bad word!" Avery said with disappointment.

"Aunt Janie!" Ava greeted with a wave and a grin. But it fell quickly when she noticed the gun her aunt's hands.

"Ava, Avery, I need you to do Aunt Janie a favor." Jane didn't break eye contact with the gunman. "I need you to run as fast as you can through those doors."

"W-why?" Ava frowned.

"It's kind of like the game we play on Sundays. You know when you guys get to run as fast as you want in my backyard and the person that's the fastest gets their ice cream first. The person that reaches the officers outside gets the biggest scoop of ice cream you've ever seen. Can you do that for me?"

It took them a moment but they nodded excitedly.

"Okay, now run." She instructed.

"No!" The gunman pulled out another gun from his waistband. "They're not going anywhere."

"Aunt Janie!" Both little girls screeched simultaneously. The second gun was pointed to Jane.

"I'm a trained officer, do you really want to try your luck with me?" her jaw was clenched. "Let them go. It's already over for you."

"If I let them go he's going to kill me."

"Who?"

"Baker." He spat, as if it was already a given and Jane was too stupid to catch up. "I ain't letting them go."

The officer on the other side of the pathway stood. "You're outnumbered." She watched as the other officer walked carefully to Avery and Ava. "We can protect you. I'll make sure Baker never gets to you. I can even shoot you and make it seem like you went down with a fight."

"You really think he would fall for that?" The man laughed. "He knows everything."

"Put the guns down."

"No."

"Put the guns down!" She was beginning to lose patience. "Now!"

"No!"

Jane wasn't sure which gone had fired. She was only positive it wasn't her gun. She waited to feel a sharp pain. She waited to be shot for the second time in twenty-four hours. But, there was no pain. And she wondered if she'd died.

Then she watched as the gunmen's body dropped to the floor. One of the officers was protecting the civilians from the flying glass. The other officer only looked at her as if she was crazy to actually shoot him. She carefully put her gun into her waistband of her jeans and walked to the open space. She looked out the large glass windows to see a figure moving from a window of a taller building across the street.

"Baker's been watching the whole time." She growled. "That's how he would know."

"He doesn't have a pulse, Rizzoli." The other officer knelt beside the gunman.

"Alright, get these three out of here. I'll go get the other gunman. I want both of you on this. If they start shooting again, you need to protect them at all costs." Both men nodded and used their own bodies and shields.

In the back of the center the man down was gone. He wasn't dead but physically gone. The back door had been left ajar and she knew her men hadn't done that. Jane couldn't help the rage that tore through her and she kicked at whatever her leg could reach.

"Fuck!"

* * *

When Maura awoke her parents had been standing at opposing points in the room. She tension between them was palpable but she didn't have the energy to even ask why. Instead she turned to her mother and asked for a cup of water. Instead her father agreed to retrieve it. Which made her mother scowl.

"Is…something…wrong?" she asked. Her voice was raspy.

"No, darling." Constance tried to smile. She touched Maura's hair. "All that is wrong is our only daughter is in this predicament."

"I'll…be…fine, mother."

"I know. Your surgeon tells us you are well on your way on the road to recovery." The older woman smiled genuinely this time. "That doesn't mean we don't worry."

Maura only nodded. She looked around the room again and noticed Jane still hadn't returned.

"She called an hour ago." Constance filled in. "She's going to be at her office for a while. There were some complications in her rescue."

"She…okay?"

"She's fine." She thought it over. "Though I suspect the morphine may be working its way out of her system. She must be in a lot of pain right now."

Maura groaned.

"She will be back, darling."

She tried to clear her throat of the dryness. Her father had returned with her water. She took a sip and tried again. "With another bullet wound." It was supposed to be one of Maura's jokes; however she only realized how much she expected it. It seemed Jane could only save lives if she risked her own even more so.

Either way, Constance let out a dry laugh anyway. "This time the bullet was not aimed for her."

The honey-blonde only relaxed slightly. "Mother, I don't want to be here anymore." She cleared her throat.

Constance thought it over for a moment. "I'm sure your father and I could monitor your bed rest from our hotel room until we go to Seattle."

"I would like to spend that time with Jane, mother."

"She is very busy, Maura."

"I know," she licked her lips. "We are going to spend an unpredictable amount of time apart. There are things we need to discuss with no interruptions."

"By discuss, do you mean…" Constance appeared merely interested, but Maura could see under the exterior of her mother's reserve. On the inside if was she freaking out about the thought of her daughter having sex. She could understand it. They'd never discussed anything so intimate. Constance had only ever told her to just be careful. It never meant anything; Maura hadn't been seeing anyone at the time. In fact, she'd just turned eighteen and was going to college in the states. Her mother's only advice for her was to be careful. Maura purposely interpreted it as advice for any situation she could find herself in.

"I mean to talk, mother." _Patience, Maura. _

"I'll call her. I will tell her you're awake. Perhaps you could take care of that request?"

"Most certainly, mother."

Maura watched as Constance left the room. She was left with her father. He obviously didn't want to talk. She was okay with that. Instead, she watched the walls. She watched the ceiling. She watched anything and everything except for her father. Finally, it began to bother her.

"Father," she merely said.

"It's my entire fault." He rushed.

"Father?"

He was at her side now. "Had I simply gone to the police with the first note. All of this could have been circumvented."

"Father, you had no way of-"

He looked at her.

"Does mother blame you?"

"Not directly." He dropped his head. "But I can feel it. However, she should. It is my fault."

"No, it's not." She grasped his hand. "I have done this to myself. I wanted to help others. This is my doing. You can't possible shoulder any amount of the blame."

"I should have-"

"It was a silly note with empty threats." She dismissed. "You didn't know. You couldn't know. As far as you were aware, I was fine. Had you gone to the police in New York, there would not have been much help they could offer. None of this is your fault. I'm sure mother doesn't mean to blame you. She's only confused and terrified. In time, she will apprehend the truth."

He kissed her hand. Then smiled. "We raised a smart woman."

"Some would be inclined to disagree." _Jane._

"That does not mean it's not true."

Maura smiled. She only hoped she could get the rest of the night alone with Jane. They truly did need to talk before she left for Seattle. Possibly before she would never get the chance to truly tell Jane how she feels. They needed to talk.

* * *

A/N: What do you guys think? Is Maura going to get the change to tell Jane everything? Do you think Jane's going to want to hear it after realizing Baker is just one step ahead of her now?

You should know Jane wasn't going to shoot the gunman. She's not legally allowed to do so anymore. I mean there's the whole civilian helping out another thing but let's be real. But that doesn't mean she can't point her gun and play cop.

Also, I'd like to state Bass is with Angela. I kind of forgot to mention it I guess but I figured it was a given and that's my fault. By Maura being in the hospital, when Angela went over, she took Bass to her apartment to monitor him for Maura.


End file.
